Libby - posted on 02/27/2009 ( 66 moms have responded )
1st pregnancy...easy, text book, born at 37 1/2 weeks, the result is a healthy 7 year old.
2nd pregnancy...complications from the beginning of the 2nd trimester, hospitalized from week 25-27, had unexplained bleeding, the result is a healthy 4 1/2 year old born 10 weeks early due to preterm labor.
3rd pregnancy...complications from the beginning of the 2nd trimester, bleeding seemed to get worse quicker than last pregnancy, she lost all of her fluid, the result was Trina was born into the arms of Jesus at 20 weeks on December 3rd, 2008.
4th pregnancy...currently 7 weeks pregnant.
So, there's my history. I'm having a hard time not expecting something to happen this pregnancy. It was very unexpected as it took us 2 years to get pregnant with our 3rd child (even tried fertility meds), so even though we wanted to try again, we never thought it would happen so soon. So, here we are, just 12 weeks after our daughter has passed away and we are thinking about our next child already. I never thought we'd lose her. I thought the worst that would happen is that we'd have another preemie. And I knew I could handle that b/c we've already had one preemie. Now this time my fear is the actual worst...will we lose this one too?
I've already decided no sex during this pregnancy. That is how my spotting started in my last 2 pregnancies and I don't want to risk anything. I also will be discussing with my doctor our game plan this time around. I think I will ask him to see if I can get the steroid injection for this baby's lungs at 24 weeks. We had discussed that for the last pregnancy but we only made it to 20 weeks. I had the steroids for the 2nd pregnancy at 25 weeks because I was having problems. So, I think even if I'm not having problems I want to see if I can get the shot as a preventative measure. Other than that, I know my doctor will perform a lot of ultrasounds to check on this baby. So, I don't have any worries with that. My doctor is always very thorough.
I'm also hoping that we don't have any complications so I don't have to go back to the specialist this time. I don't feel like he treated me very well after he did some tests on me after I wasn't pregnant anymore. I waited for over 2 weeks for the results that I ended up telling my regular doctor about and he got me the results I had been waiting for. But if I have to see him again,of course I will, for the benefit of the baby. But again, I hope I don't have to b/c that only means that things are going great!
So, how do I not worry about every little twinge? How do I not over do it? How do I not let the stress of worry overwhelm me? How do I get through pregnancy milestones that I didn't reach in my last pregnancy? How do I not fear the worst?