Having a hard time!!!!!

Mandy - posted on 04/17/2009

Hi all



Thanx for all your replys and kind words. It really helped a lot. Strating to feel a bit better now seing the light again. Hugs and kisses

Ginny - posted on 04/12/2009

It's always hard, every year. I think it always will be. It has changed, but I will always miss my son, and you will always miss your son. And it's ok to hurt - it stinks, but you need to feel what you feel. Hugs.

Mary - posted on 04/12/2009

Mandy, I am sorry for your loss. Do whatever it is that you need to do to ease the pain. No one can know but you what that is.

Beth - posted on 04/12/2009

Thinking of you today Mandy

Sharon - posted on 04/09/2009

Mandy~I completely understand how you are feeling. My son would of turned 4 on 4/18/09. The days get harder right before his bday and right before the anniversary of his death. He was 7 months and 8 days old when he passed away 11/26/05. I still just have to take it minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. That is the only thing I can do. It really helps when there is someone who actually does know how you feel. Feel free to add me as a friend and vent away! I am right there with you! You are in my prayers!

Tab - posted on 04/06/2009

July 1st will be ten years since i lost my daughter Zoey, and June 3rd will be 7 years since i lost my son, Jordan. time makes things more bearable for me, but i will always miss what could have been with my babies. i understand completely what you are saying...

Rose - posted on 04/06/2009

You have the right to do what ever it is you need to! I have learned to cope with those special days. I like to put flowers and Balloons down where DJ's memorial is. I lost my son when he was 14. It is still hard to this day, it has only been 4 years 4mos. Seems like yesterday. Grieve how you need to. May God bless you and your Family. I will pray he gives you a little peace. Bitter Sweet Days is what I call them.

Monique - posted on 04/06/2009

a year after my son passed away i met an elderly woman who had been through the same thing years earlier.she told me that although the pain is always there,you never get over it.my son would have turned 14 on April 4th.although i was sad,i coped.and so will you.So you go for it,rant and rave to your hearts content.those of us who have lived a tragedy like this,fully understand and wont hold it against you.will be thinking of you on the 12th.

Karen - posted on 04/05/2009

No matter how many years pass, you will still feel sad on your child birthday or special days. My son would have been 31 this May, and every year I feel a sense of loss on the day he was born and died. It is not as raw and painful, but sad none-the-less.

Lori Rice - posted on 04/05/2009

May you find peace and tranquility during your times of need. Those who know, know we get through the best way we know how, those who don't know try to tell us how to do it. All you need to know is how to do it your own way.

Stephanie - posted on 04/04/2009

Our daughter's birthday just passed on March 14th.  She would have been 5.  It still stings and every year around this time I just know I'll need to take some time to reflect, be sad ect.  I find it better if I don't bottle it up, I spend some time alone going through her things, looking at pictures and crying.  I don't think I will every stop my yearly ritual.  I think it is how I stay happy, positive and well balanced through the rest of the year.

Tammy - posted on 04/03/2009

Mandy- your son's bday will be his day even when your 90+ years old- he's your son... I agree with the others- do whatever you need to do on that day. For 5+ years, I had a very difficult time being around anyone else on my daughter's bday, it gradually got better.  Have you attended any support groups? for me , they were helpful.  I also did a memorial garden for her- since her bday's April18,  d.o.d. is May 31, spring can be very difficult- even after13 years. Whatever traditions you can do to help you through- it's OK... praying for you.

Pamela - posted on 04/02/2009

I try to take time for myself that day so I can be quiet, loud or whatever. It's O.K. to be emotional. It's also O.K. to take time to think about how special your son is. I'm religious so I pray and wonder what it's going to be like when we do finally meet.

The bond between a mother and child is precious, even when they are no longer with us.

Marinda - posted on 04/02/2009

Those special days I know will always be difficult for parents, I`ts as if I miss her that little bit more, thinking about what could`ve been. I always bought jenine a bunch of her favourite flowers (some people may think, but why? well because I believe in my heart that she can still enjoy the beauty of them with me, and I also lit a big white candle that usually burns for 2 days, and burns her favourite insence. I`ve noticed that people around us tend to forget and I do not remind them (meaning family/friends) it`s enough for me that her brother and father celebrate her special day with me, the sad thing about her birthday is that it`s the day after christmas,making christmas a very sad time indeed, it took me 2 years to celebrate christmas time again.but I must admit that it makes me sad to know that she was here for 20 years and that it is as if she was never here for others, but I suppose thats what life is like.Maybe you can also begin a little ritual that you can have on your little ones birthday to make it special for you and to remeber all of the beauty that he had brought into your life, I always say that our children were more than that awfull moments that we`ve lost them.I will be thinking of him on the 12, maybe you can share his name with us. Love and hugs to you, always

Beth - posted on 04/02/2009

Thinking of you... Also having a rough time, and I've learnt it's best to just get it out...

Libby - posted on 04/02/2009

Rant and rave all you want!  You deserve to be able to do that.  You are experiencing a loss no matter hold old or new it is, it's still yours.  I wouldn't expect you to not have a hard time for his birthday.  I hope nobody expects you to just be a certain way when those days come around.  Or even if it's not a "special day", you still have the right, no matter how many years later, to have a hard time.  I hope you have a wonderful day of rememberance on April 12th.  May God bless you.