i have lost my son 14th april. he was only of 9 days.i can't forget his face.

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Summer - posted on 07/02/2012

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Shahnawaz,

What is your son's name? Would you share any memories with us?

I lost my oldest daughter, Rose, when she was 12 days old, over fifteen years ago. I still remember her face, and as someone else said, her smell, her touch, etc. I remember how hard it was to nurse her and how nice it felt to hold her. I didn't think that I could survive the pain, but my grandmother had lost a 2 year old son and she comforted me. I loved to talk with her and hear her stories, it relieved me to know that the memories (and pain) would stay with me, it had been 50 years since her son died.

One of the things that comforted me was knowing that the pain is a memorial to your child. While we shouldn't let the pain consume us, know that it is normal and it is because you love your child so much.

It is okay to feel the pain. It does change with time. I look at my friends with teenagers and think of my daughter, but while it hurts still, it doesn't consume all of my thoughts. I think about her often, but I am able to go through my days. I believe that I will see her again, so I don't feel as though she is completely lost to me. You are in my thoughts and prayers, my heart goes out to you.

Silvia - posted on 05/17/2012

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Im sorry for your loss Romela. I totally agree with you, My daughter would have been two this july and i still find myself crying almost everyday. I thought it would get easier for me but so far it hasnt :(

Romela - posted on 05/17/2012

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I also lost my son, Lorenz nine days after birth, due to neonatal sepsis. It was his 4th birthday yesterday...I still remember his face. I never had a chance to carry him in my arms while he was still alive because he was incubated...he was only 27 weeks in my womb...Although some may say time would heal...but as moms, we will still find ourselves crying over the loss of a child even after quite a long time have passed...

Silvia - posted on 05/16/2012

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I am so sorry for your loss and everyone else's loss on here. Losing a baby is devastating, and i wish none of us had to go through it. My daughter was stillborn in 2010, 4 days after her due date and I can still remember her face. I don't think I will ever forget it. Im glad your on here. This website has helped me alot and I hope it helps you too. Please hang in there and know that none of you are alone. We'l see our angels again someday ♥

Caitlin - posted on 05/12/2012

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I am very sorry for your loss.

You will never forget his face and nor should you. I lost my son who was 13 days old in August of 2004. I remember everything about him and my heart still has a tremendous hole in it.

All I can say is time does help but never fully takes away the pain. I suggest a support group- it helps to know your not alone in this and you weren't singled out or being punished as I felt. I found a wonderful friend in support group and 8 years later we are still close. It really helped..

Again I am so sorry for your loss but I mean it when I say it does get easier...

Renee - posted on 04/29/2012

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I too have just lost a baby. Her name is Samantha and she was 8 days old. We just laid her to rest 48 hours ago and I'm at a loss of what to do now.

Katherine - posted on 04/27/2012

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It is totally normal. You don't want to forget him and so your mind will try to capture every detail. The good (while alive) and the bad (after he passed). If you find your mind is sticking a lot to the negative, please talk to a counselor. You may have PTSD, it's not uncommon after losing a child, but it can rob you of the blessing of your child (if that makes sense).

I am so sorry that you are here.

[deleted account]

I am so sorry for your loss.
You never will forget his face. His smell. The way he felt in your arms. Nor, should you. However, you WILL heal. When I was told of my son' s death (at age 35 - by the police, as he lived out-of-state), it was like being shot in the heart by a shotgun. I could literally feel a huge hole appear in my chest. The pain was indescribable - and SO real. I had to figure out how to tell my husband, our other children, etc. The important thing is to focus on the love you HAVE - and always will. Focus on daily celebrations of life with your family members. You MUST focus on life - and the happy memories. Sadness will come - when you expect it - and when you least expect it. Let it happen. Hug someone you love - or call them. Know that you WILL HEAL. Know that the scar will always remain - but the huge gaping hole heals - and your heart is once again able to hold love within it. If the sadness begins to affect every aspect of your life - getting up, functioning on a daily basis - talk t you physician. Situational depression is very real, and being so soon after delivery is so chemically based - you may need some chemical re-balancing.
Again, I am so sorry for your loss. It feels like the pain will never go away, and no one knows what you are going through - and you are right - loss is so different for each of us. However, your son was created in love, and that love will never die. Try to be thankful that you were blessed with the creation of love and life - if ever so brief. After all, it is always too brief. Peace be with you.

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