I hope to bring my next baby home. . . .

Amber - posted on 05/02/2013 ( 190 moms have responded )

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It's not easy walking in the shoes that were given to us. The sadness that lingers of knowing we had a beautiful baby, but the baby became an angel and did not come home with us.



This conversation is to provide HOPE.

Hope to have nights of crying less from sadness.

Hope for a positive pregnancy test when trying to conceive.

Hope for no fear of what this next pregnancy will bring. And finally hope for the cutest, cuddliest bundle of love in our arms.



Do share what you plan to do on your journey after your pregnancy loss.

xo

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Nini - posted on 01/04/2014

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Hi jamie and all the mums -
Jamie you can do a little service - to remember him dosent need to be sad


Cathy thank you xx
She is the best feeling the best thing xx

Cathy - posted on 11/04/2013

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It's ok babe, u can vent and get angry all u like...Bcoz ur aloud to! This is not what u should be dealing with right now, we should be cuddling our baby girls, so if u wanna scream and get angry every now and then, then do so. Sometimes when my hubby isn't home, probably more so after I lost our rainbow baby I would just go in the shower and sit on the floor and cry and scream at god, I'm not religious but I had to yell at someone. Made me feel a tad better I guess. Trust me when I say this that one day u will smile again, I know it doesn't feel like it now,but I. Can say I'm pretty happy with my life, I have to look around me and look at all the good things in my life, and I know u don't wanna hear that Bcoz it's all so fresh for u babe, but u will get to a point and be happy. There will always be a lace for u daughter and no other baby. Will ever replace her, but it will be her siblings and there the closest thing we will have to our baby girls. My brier and his wife had there second baby 5 weeks ago today. And he has been the best thing that has happened to me. Wow...he's what made meso happy again and I know Im guna be the best mum to my next baby..Who I WILL be brining home from the hospital. I love her name honey, it's weird Bcoz her middle name is my daughters middle name, but we spelt it Kaylyn. I miss Ariana sooo much, but I know she's watching over me.
So where are u from babe,?? I'm from south Australia.im 28 and Im a hairdresser. I manage and run a massive salon in the city, and it's been the best place for me to be whilst I was heeling. My clients have been amazing, coming and sitting with me at home in the beggining and making lots of food and bringing it over for me. They have watched me grow up since I was 18 so for them it was hard to hear I lost her. Everyone is just in such shock. I hope ur doing ok? I know ur not and I know it hard but I'm here for u Hun. Xxx

Cathy - posted on 11/03/2013

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Hello beautiful angel mummy, I'm soooooo sorry for ur tragic loss. No words will ever make this better babe, but just know we are all here for eachother and we are all in the same boat. I don't know why life has to be soooo cruel to such beautiful ppl. Our angels are always with us. I swear sometimes I can feel Ariana around me. U have a long road ahead if u babe, it's not going to be easy and u and ur man will pull through this. I know it doesn't seem like it at the moment, it's just a big fat daze....I remember just drifting through the first couple of weeks after giving birth to Ariana. It will be her 10month anniversary on the 15th of November, and I can say.....wow...what a difference 10 months makes. I'm feeling back to almost normal, I guess it is a new normal. I still have my days...but there never full days of sadness. Work was the best thing for me and I have amazing co workers and clients and family and friends who have been their for me in my time of need. We lost our rainbow baby at 6 weeks....I feel pregnant 4monthe after having Ariana. So we are just taking the time to heel this year and starting next year we will try again.u need to do what's best for u and hubby babe. Some days I feel as though some one cut a limb off me....she was apart of me as ur daughter was a part of you. What did u name her honey? I hope I havnt said anything to upset u but please trust me when I say one day we will get our rainbow baby's and even though they will never replace our first born love...it will fill our hearts up with love once again. Xxxxxx

Vivian - posted on 11/01/2013

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Hello all! My name is Vivian, and I came across this website while searching for ways to grieve and cope. 2 days ago, I was 38 weeks gestational with a baby girl and went in for my weekly pre-natal check up, the nurse did a routine weight and BP check, then preceded to check her heartbeat. When she couldn't hear one, she quickly rushed me next door to the fetal specialist who took my ultrasound. Only to find that there was no heartbeat either. He gave me the most devastating news I could ever imagine possible, and I soon went into the hospital to be induced. Within 4 hours of getting the gel to open up my cervix, I found myself in labor and delivering to a lifeless baby. Everything happened so fast and was physically, mentally and emotionally draining! I could not keep myself together knowing that I would endure 9 months of an emotional attachment only to have to let her go within hours of delivering her. Today my milk is coming in and I feel a great emptiness and depression knowing my body is going through so much pain and changes all for absolutely nothing. My fiancé and I are now trying to cope and accept what has really happened to us. We are still in so much shock and disbelief that we don't know where to begin to grieve. It is truly devastating and the worst thing we could ever expect to go through as a couple. We already decided that we want to try again in the ear future, but is this too soon? We both agree and understand that no one or nothing can replace our first love, but I feel as though this will help us fill a void and bring joy to us again. We also planned to take a vacation after the funeral has passed.

Amber - posted on 10/15/2013

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Hello ladies!

Today in North America marks pregnancy and infant loss day. I miss Isabella every day! I lit a candle for her and all of you who miss your bundles of love!
However, I believe I have her as my angel looking after my new baby! Yes, you read that correctly, I'm expecting!! Not till May, so I am almost 12 weeks!

Thinking of our pain today. Praying for a healthy baby and sending everyone love!!

xo

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Bianca - posted on 04/14/2014

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Hi all my baby girl was a still born 3-29-14 37 wks 6lb 15oz 20inch. it was the most devastating heart breaking thing ive ever gone thru. I had a docters appointment the 28th of march nd she was fine. Friday came and I was getting bad contractions so my bf rushed me too the hospital. As soon as the nurse tryd too fined a heart beat there was nothing. I was soo scared. My mom and mother inlaw tryd too calm me down by saying maybe she was in a certain position. They did a ultra sounf and there was no movement no heart beat. Those words im soo sorry coming from my doctor. I felt like I was hit my a truck. Like my heart was ripped out. I felt like my life was over. How can you say good bye too ur hopes and dreams. Too a child that you love soo much. :'(. Everyone will say ohh shes in a better place. Theres no better place than in my arms. I miss my baby girl so much I miss her kicks and her rolling around. I cry everyday. I will literally die of a broken heart :"( but I kno I gotta be strong for My son joshua who is 6 years old and also autistic. It broke my heart when he seen me cry and he tells me ( No dont cry) my babyboi new I was sad :'(. Me and my bf been trying for years for another baby nd as soon I get pregnant and get my baby girl. Shes gone :'(. I wouldnt wish this pain on my worst enemy :'(. The docters couldn't explain wat happend. But im upset cuz my doc appointment prior my doc had mentioned that I was showing signs of preeclampsia. I dont understand why she wouldn't pute me on bed rest if I was showing signs. Me and my bf want another baby soo bad but im soo scared. I dont want too go thru this again. My baby girl was soo beautiful looked just like I imagined. She looks just like her daddy ♡ . We will never replace our daughter. She will always be our baby girl nd her big brothers little sister. We just want a bigger family nd a brother n sister for joshua. Idk what too do I want another baby soo bad. losing a child nd coming home with empty arms is the worst thing and feeling a mother can go thru. :'( shes forever our babygirl nd our lil angel ♡

♡lylah celest♡ 3-29-14 we love you baby girl

Jamie - posted on 01/03/2014

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I lost my Little angel on 12/24/13 I was 37 weeks pregnant. I had gone in to the dr. for my weekly ultra sound and dr visit. the ultra sound tech could not find my little boy's heart beat I was brought over to the hospital and they started my induction right away 16 hrs later I gave birth to this perfectly formed beautiful little boy the only issue he was sleeping never to wake again. I had him cremated but now what do I do I want to have a memorial service but I don't want it to be sad we have had enough sad any ideas.

Cathy - posted on 01/02/2014

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Nini.....OHMY gooooood......congrats babe. Ur the first angel mummy to have there RAINBOW BABY!!! I'm sooo happy with tears right how. I wish u and ur family well and the new year for u....is looking soooo much brighter than last year, lots of loooove. Xxxxx
And I'm sooo Tiara this is such a lonely place to be in...but in time it will heel. It will be Ariana's 1st birthday on the 15th January and I'm happy to say that after loosing our rainbow baby in June we have started the new year with trying again. Fingers crossed ladies. Our storm is slowly passing and our rainbows will soon be on the way. Love and strength. I'm feeling soooo great in the new year. Lots of love and new begginging's for 2014!!!! Love to u all. Xxxx

Nini - posted on 01/01/2014

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Hello ladies how are you all???

Guess what?

I had litttle baby Evie- dec 16 her due date at 3 mins to midnight -
She is a 3.6 kilo baby at 54 cm
And she is my angel :))

All i can say is i still cant believe shes in my arms or mine -

All i can say don't give up
I lost my son - but i bought Evie into life and i never gave up - just believe in ur selves

XxxX

Tiara - posted on 12/30/2013

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I posted this in the thread I found this conversation in but thought I should post it here instead:)
I lost my son, Elijah, on 12/19/13 at 23 weeks. He was 1lb 1ounce and 11in long. He had huge hands and feet and was beautiful. He had been sick and struggling with low amniotic fluid since 18 weeks (never more than 2cm) due to my membranes rupturing at 16weeks, Placenta Previa and SCH caused too much pressure. When he was born he had multiple contractures and hip dysplasia along with the cord being wrapped tightly around his entire body. He wasn't healthy, happy or safe. God intervened when I could not and granted me the Mercy of taking my son before he suffered and even if that Mercy entails me never hearing his laugh, falling in love with his smile or even learning his voice I am grateful. I'm not angry or bitter towards anyone, I don't feel regret (mainly because we fought HARD for him for as long as we could) or jealousy. What I do feel is an aching and a longing that I've never known. I am a mother, Elijah makes me one obviously, but it's more than that. I've been a mother since I found out he existed, since I felt his first kicks and saw his little heartbeat flickering on the screen. I am a mother with no child to hold, and my arms are painfully empty. We are trying again as soon as possible. Not because another child can replace Elijah; he will always be our son, he will always be present in our minds. I'm not trying to "get over" him with another baby it's just I don't see the lure in waiting...but then again I was born a whole 8 months after my mom's stillborn son. I think this decision is highly personal and people who haven't been there can't understand the desire and love associated with it. I'm very happy to have found this thread :)

Cathy - posted on 11/05/2013

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Naw, thanks babe, Ariana has made me strong, and even though u don't feel it in the beggining your baby girl will make u this strong amazing woman who can face anything.
U are very lucky u didnt have to work your whole pregnancy, u have a good fiancé honey. I worked up u till 35 1/2 weeks standing on my feet 40hours a week....aghhhh, I was sooo excited to finish up and begin mummy hood. =[
Did they know the cause? Ariana's was a tight knot in the chord.
We have no other children,just Ariana and our rainbow baby who we lost at 6 weeks. We had every test under the sun done to us after Ari passed away, but our health and everything is perfect so it was just a horrible accident. And jellybean...well...I think it was too soon after having Ariana and that's why I lost it. Less than 4 months after we had her, they did recommend 4-6 months then try. Us ill know when the time is right babe.
And ur aloud to envious it's only normal, I felt that. Way Nd probably still do a little bit,but I am happy for ppl toget there healthy screaming baby's Bcoz u wouldn't wish this on ur worst enemy's, love and hugs honey pie. Xxxx

Vivian - posted on 11/05/2013

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Cathy,

You're such a strong and incredible woman! Thank you for taking your time to talk to me! Your story made me feel so much better. I'm 25, I'm from the US. I stopped working as soon as I found out I got preggo bc my fiancé is such an amazing soul that he wanted me to just have a happy and stress free pregnancy, so he pretty much took complete care of me financially. I am so thankful for him!!!! My heart aches for him the most bc he has worked sooooo hard these past 9 months for this family. And even to this day he's had a better attitude about this whole thing than I! He's been the one to keep a smile on my face when he sees me completely zoned out and thinking of Sinalee.

There are times when I see my friends who are new moms, or who are expecting and I'm so envious of them. I long to be a mom and I feel so angry that it has been taken away from me. My family and friends are all in complete shock as well but everyone has been so supportive of the both of us these past few days! I absolutely love the name Kaylen/Kaylyn :) I think I may name my next daughter after her sisters middle name!

How many kids do you have? Are you planning to try again?

Vivian - posted on 11/03/2013

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Her name was Sinalee Kaylen :)

I feel as if I'm just drifting and I've lost all control of my life. I feel like there's no more meaning to it and it feels empty. For 9 months, my fiancé and i turned our life around to build a future for her, every single day, we talked and thought about her for 85% of the time, now that it's all gone, what is our purpose now? Where do we begin to grieve and move on? I want to try again but I have to wait until my body is healed after a vaginal delivery.

I'm just really venting but I'm so happy to know that I have people I can talk to and relate to.

Cathy - posted on 10/22/2013

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Congrats amber, that's soooo. Great. A, sooooo happy and excited for u and ur family. Ur angel will make sure everything is perfect. Xxxx yay.
Nini, wow...not long at all to go. That's awesome for the both of u. Babies are just popping out every where. Lol my nephew was born on the 1st October, just perfect. He's been great for me to have around, I just take over and my sister in law doesn't care at all. She knows how good this is for me. Love it. We are waiting till after Ariana's first birthday to start trying again. New uear,fresh start. I just think I couldn't Handel another loss this year. But next year is guna be my year and I can't wait. S happy for u ladies. Love to u all.x xxxxx

Nini - posted on 10/21/2013

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Congrats amber:) and good luck :))

Im now 32 weeks - and our baby is doing well - everytjing so far is good - i have her monitored at hospital every second day - n she just never sits still- she kicks very hard and. All the time i hsvent had much sleep in my third trimester - the morning sickness has gone - but my heart burn is back -

How are all you ladies doing ??

Hii cathy :) hope you well

Xxx

Cathy - posted on 10/15/2013

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Hey ladies, how are we all doing?? Long time no chat. Hope everyone is well. Love to u all! Xxxxx

Lana - posted on 09/20/2013

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Hi Nina! I am so happy for your next addition to the family! wow two more months! are your drs planning to induce you? I really miss the kicks and cant wait to feel them again!
all is good on my end. Baby girl that is too sweet! Praying for you and your family! Keep us posted!!

Hey Cathy! How was Bali? I saw it on tv the other day and I was thinking of you! Good luck with the baby making soon!

Nini - posted on 09/17/2013

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Hii girls - its a beautiful baby girl :)
Im soo excited n so happy
I also received a letter from my gyni - the test has come and it says i have no diabetes :)))
Immm soooo sooo over the moon :) and that our baby girl is doing well
Also :))

All i can say is - dont give up xx

Cathy - posted on 09/17/2013

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Hey. Babe, that's soooo wonderful for you guys, so happy. So ur not telling ppl the sex then? Awwwwww......u must be glowing right now honey. I can't wait till I have something growing inside of me!! Feel so empty. Two losses in 5 months is just too much for me this year. We do wanna start trying but we don't. Aghhhh.....all to hard really. Xxxxx

Nini - posted on 09/17/2013

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Hello ladies ! :) how are we all ???

First of all i been feeling up and down but it has been the best trimester :)

We found out the sex :)
And it was hard telling ppl ...
Especially what happened to us -
But i see my gyni now every two weeks
I just had my gtc - test - ( glycose ) so i get results tommorow i seen our baby many times !! Im at 27 weeks n couple days mearly at my 7 months and all is going well
Baby is 1.1 kgs already which has made me soo happy and im past the mark of last time :)
And baby is always kicking - nearly 2 months left for me -
And i stopped work also last week on my birthday on the 12/9



Cathy!!! How r you ???
Lana???? How r things with you
Amber hows everything with you ???


Hugs kisses to you all

Cathy - posted on 09/15/2013

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I hope each day gets a dot better. For you. Honey. We are all here to listen...no judgments...just love and honesty, xxxxx

Nicole - posted on 09/13/2013

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Thanks Cathy, Thanks so much for all that you said. I also believe that our babies are up in heaven waiting for us. I think the same thing and always ask myself why my baby. At first I believed that I had done something so bad in my life to deserve that happening to me but realized that is not the case. I have to believe it happened for a reason. I miss him and will bring a baby home one day! I am glad you got to take a vacation that I bet was much needed. My husband and I took a little vacation as well just to spend time together and relax. It was definitely much needed! It helps after everything that happened.

Cathy - posted on 09/12/2013

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Hello Nicole, I'm so so heartbroken another mummy has to join this group. Welcome, we are here for each other, and if u need to be sad then be so or angry...let it out. It's not going to be an easy road babe, but each day u feel a dot better than the day before....then one day ul wake up and ul feel like ur right back at the beginning again....it comes in waves honey and I'm sure u have already found that out.
It's Ariana's 8 months in Sunday. I was 39 weeks when I hadn't felt her move, went and got her checked and she was gone. Tight knot in the chord...a freak accident. We just went to bail for 12 nights, just got back today, we stayed in the most amazing place u have ever seen....like crazy beautiful....$700 a night beautiful. We thought that we have earnt this and would spoil our selves. I can tell you it did us a world of good....but every time I'd feel really happy.....my mind would stop and ing of Ariana and that she should be here with us and it's just not fair...why my little princess. I feel like that feeling will never leave me....WHY MY BABY??? It's natural....it's not that u want it to happen to anyone else's baby....it's just why us? But know that I really sometimes feel Ari is with me...I can be alone and something comes on the tv...like a song I use blast when I'd be driving when I was pregnant with Ari...and she would always kick and go crazy when this song came on. When I was driving back from my mums today I was thinking of her and crying.....and then that song came on the radio....and I feel like that was her saying don't cry mummy...I'm with u always. Until we take our last breath we will never stop loving and missing them....never stop hurting and always wondering what they would of been like. But I'm not scared to die anymore...Bcoz I know when that day comes in the very very distant future....our baby's will be waiting for us...and we will never let them go. We get to have baby's in heaven...and I know that's no good to us now...and I'm not religious by any means...but I have to believe that there is something more than just this life. There always with us honey, just look for the signs. Sorry...I'm rambling and sorry if iv up set you. I'm a little tipsy, so a little emotional and I haven't slept from our plan ride this morning. 1am flight...ewwwww . I send u love and hugs honey. Xxxxx

Lana - posted on 09/06/2013

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HI Nicole! Welcome! we are so sorry for your loss...we know exactly how you feel. remember we are here to listen to you. I lost my son 10 months ago and there is not a day goes by that I don't think of him. in my case it was for unknown reasons at 37 weeks. wishing you all the best and make sure you are better physically and mentally:)

Nicole - posted on 09/05/2013

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Hello Ladies, I was hoping I could join. I lost my son Wyatt on July 29th at 31 weeks to what they believe was a cord accident. I miss him more every day and no day seems to go by that I don't think about him. We decided that we will start trying in a few months. Really hoping that we are able to bring our next baby home!

Cathy - posted on 08/29/2013

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Yeah, it's is weird that our Father's Day. Nd mothers days are different! I'm sure he will have a great day once we are in the air. Lol. Love to all u. Xxxxx

Lana - posted on 08/29/2013

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HI Cathy! i am well! lucky you vacation time!! Funny our Father's Day is in June:)
hope your husband have a great Father's Day!

Cathy - posted on 08/28/2013

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Hey ladies, how are we all?? I'm much better this week. My emotions have been all over the place the last 2 weeks, but I only have three more days of work and then it's Bali time. I'm sooo happy we are going on a holiday and leave on Father's Day. At least hubby's mind will be taken off of missing Ariana so much. Hope all is well. Havnt heard from u ladies in a while. Love u all. Xxxxx

Cathy - posted on 08/24/2013

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Hey lana, how are u honey pie??
Thank u for ur encouraging words babe. I was a little crazy last night.....and have been for the last week or so. I guess a lot of things have come up about Ariana this week and iv had a few clients return to me not knowing about Ari's death and them rushing into the salon with there baby pics and asking to see mine....and Bcoz I havnt gotten that in a while....like....everyone knows about Ari's passing...I guess this week it's caught me off guard and I have just crumbled. But feeling better today. Every day is a new face of greif so I guess I should be thank ful for my health and the the ppl in my life that love and support me and try be a bit more understanding with other ppls problems too.
Yeah....where has everyone gone from here??? Love u all?? Xxxxx

Lana - posted on 08/23/2013

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Hi Cathy! I know what you mean! We have been put in a terrible situation that is not the order of life. But remember that some people are stronger than others and that in the end we do not know what they are going through...They might have a mental disorder that they cannot cope with. I know what you mean some women who has everything they could ever want in life and they are not happy. I still wake up sometimes thinking I have to feed my son. You see some people who has everything yet they want more will put themselves in depression. I have start thinking our situations as a blessing and not a tragedy anymore because when I think of my son I don't want to cry but I want to smile. Smile the moment I got to hold him. Smile that he is an angel. Smile that no one can ever hurt him and he only knows love and happiness. But most important smile because he is ours!
so don't get upset that this woman is mentally ill and constantly complaining to you...maybe because she has no one else to talk and her life is not as what it seems.
Hope Everyone is well! Mariam and Amber has been M.I.A for a while! Hope all you ladies are doing well!

Cathy - posted on 08/23/2013

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Ok so this is guna sound like I'm a bitch......and I should be sympathetic, but some ppl in my life ATM are having break downs......for no reason. They can't pin point whyu there sooooo depressed......they have an amazing job, high paying has an amzing boyfriend has a beautiful house, money is sooooo amazingly beautiful and sexy. So this person in my life I love her dearly but she has now quit her job Bcoz she can't be bothered and is just depressed........and all I can think when this person in complaining to me is.....TRY GIVING BIRTH TO UR BABY U GREW INSIDE U FOR 9 months and know at the end of that natural labour u have a lifeless baby......u have a funeral to plan not a party to show off ur baby......try going back to work after 8 weeks of giving birth and be in a job that u have to pretend to be happy every day.....and all u think about is ur baby that never got to take it's first breath. I wake every morning knowing,,,.ari should be waking me up..not my alarm clock. Every minute of the day is a struggle.
She's on anti depressants and a whole lot of other drugs (prescription) plus goes to a psychiatrist.....and all I think is.....for fukd sake....snap out of it woman.....ur shit is nothing compared to what we have been through in the last 7 months....I know I'm sounding bitchy and I'm sorry but if I don't rely on medication....anti depressants and psychiatrist then why the fuk can't u snap out of it and stop complaining to me.
My hair is falling out in clumps...I have dermatitis on my face which looks horrible....I miss Ariana like the is no tomorrow but I still get up, put on a smile and go to work.
Sorry lady's...I can't vent to ppl about this but some times I just think toughen the fuk up. When uv been through what we have all been through....then come and cry to me. Iv got enough shit to deal with without other ppls shit and messy life.
I love u ladies. I'm sorry I rambled. Xxxx hope uz are all ok?? Xxxx

Lana - posted on 08/21/2013

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Hey Cathy! I know what you mean! That is nice that work understands because some work don't care! We are all lucky we work with great people! I hope you feel better soon!

Cathy - posted on 08/20/2013

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Hope everyone's hanging in there?? I got sent home for work today.....have been a frikn basket case today. Missing Ariana so much! Love u all. Xxx

Cathy - posted on 08/17/2013

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Morning ladies, how are we all? I'm going to a lunch with a friend from work her sister had her sleep angel 6 months ago,same as Ari tight knot in the chord at 36 weeks. He angels name is Anthony, his mummy's name is susie, we have become the best of friends. I'm meeting her family today, they have been dying to meet the girl who has made there daughter happy over the last 6 months. It's so nice to have someone who I can meet up with and just knows exactly how I feel...no need to explain.,,..like with my other girl friends, I love them to bits but unless uv been through it....u really have no idea how we feel every day. I hope everyone is ok? Mariam have ubeen to the doctors yet Hun? Hope ur ok? Xxx

Lana - posted on 08/16/2013

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Hi Mariam! it sounds like you are stressing a lot! (which we all have been through) ... my last period was 47 days! once i went to the dr and she was going to give me meds to start my period i relaxed and got it the next day!
so please try to de-stress yourself from pregnancy because once you do it will be easy! Also my dr said that if you have a period longer than 40 days you most likely did ovulate...did you check your CM during the middle of your month? what kind of preggo test did you take? some have higher and lower hcg level detected!

Cathy - posted on 08/16/2013

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Hey ladies, how are we all?? Hope everyone is coping as good as they can?!
Mariam, how r u Hun?? I'm sure things will get back to normal soon. I know ur guna hate me saying this but try not to stress about it....I know...how can u not....but I'm sure there is a good explanation for this. I hope ur doctor gives u. The reassuring answer u need.
Well we are off to Bali in two weeks on Sunday,sooooooo excited. Omg.....this is so wat I need right now. Love to u all. Xxxx

Mariam - posted on 08/15/2013

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hii every body, hopes every one is in their high spirits, girls im having a bit of a problem im on my CD 51 AND NO AF yet and ofcourse im testing negative for pregnancy. called my doctor she wants to do a ultrasound just to see if my ovaries are doing ok. it really sucks if feel like cryng after going through a loss u have to endure more. mmy body isnt comming back on track dont know what to do. clueless

Lana - posted on 08/14/2013

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Hi Nesha!
you are right you do feel that family and friends start to disappear but remember they are just so sad for you and don't know how to talk to you and if they cry infront of you they will make you sad and they do not want that. It is hard as this situation has cause me to lose relationship but at the same time realizing who are most important to me in my life. The test will help tell you and give you peace of mind. I wish you all the best!

Nesha - posted on 08/12/2013

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It's been 4 weeks since Vinnie Jr. was born. I am still having trouble sleeping, but it's getting a little better now that I'm doing some testing. I feel like I'm doing something positive to prevent this from ever happening again. It's helping... not just sitting around moping. I have a purpose, something to distract me when things get tough. My support group of family and friends just about disappeared after the second week. They don't know how to talk to me right now, and I don't have the patience to deal with them. I know it will get better... it's just slow going.

Cathy - posted on 08/09/2013

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Hello dani, congrats on ur beautiful daughters, u will hold ur son one day...in the very very very distant future. I really belive ill hold Ariana one day. But for now I must try give her a brother or sister to watch over. Life is just sooo hard...but no one ever said it would be easy. I pray for u and ur beautiful family that ur little bubba will come out healthy and screaming at the top of there lungs. Love to u and bubba and family. Xxxxx

Dani - posted on 08/09/2013

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I am pregnant now. I just pray. And think positive thoughts. I dont think there is really much else that can be done but hoping and praying. In the end though, I truly believe my little Sierra Louise (my 19wk old unborn baby) and Tally my 6 yr. old will bury me and her father some day. And then I will get to hold my son again even if it's just a hug/embrace and not as small baby in my arms.

Cathy - posted on 08/09/2013

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Hey beautiful ladies, for dsome reason the msgs are not showing up for 2 to 3 days after uz have posted. Not sure why. I'm sure ur period will come back honey, mine took 6 weeks after my miscarriage. So it's ovulation week next week and hubby is wanting us to try again. I'm not so sure. I think I should. Not try till October. I guess he is getting older and issooooo ready for a baby.
I can't. Sit till we are on holidays....3 weeks to go.yay,
Iv been pretty sad the last two weeks. Crying infront of clients......I just miss her so much! I hate it. But life must go on. I hope everyone is managing ok??
Love u all. Xxxx

Lana - posted on 08/08/2013

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yea mine came on day 47! so dont worry. its best to do things natural so that you do not worry about the side effects of drugs. Good luck this month!

Mariam - posted on 08/07/2013

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hey lana, i called my doctor today, she said the same thing that anxiety n stress might be delaying my period, she said to wait for a couple of days n let the AF start on their own, im also having verrry heavy white discharge (TMI) mayb aunt flow is on its way,im already on day 42 i dont know my body is acting strangely after all this. and yeah v have started trying this month but missed sum days as v were out of town. i wasnt very hopeful this month, but now i have other problems to cope with like AF not showing at all. it will be 5 months on the 25 of august since he went to heaven.
Cathy where have u been, long time??

Lana - posted on 08/07/2013

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no I am not using any strips i just monitor my cm...My OB says that if my menstrual cycle is longer than 40 days that mean you did not ovulate. Dont worry I know how to feel after losing a baby you even question if you are fertile...but once you go see your dr and ask for the medication to start your period you will feel better and not stress as much! are you trying already? This Friday will be 9 months since my baby became an angel...I am scared and nervous all at the same time!

Mariam - posted on 08/07/2013

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HEY LANA UR RITE I STRESS ABOUT EVERY THING AND I GUESS THAT MIGHT BE THE REASON. I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION, DID U TRACK DOWN OVULATION, I MEAN ARE U USING OVULATION STRIPS OR OTHER METHODS OF ANALYZING UR CM.

Lana - posted on 08/07/2013

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Hi Mariam!
My period was first 33 days, then 35 days then 42 days then 47 days! I went to see my OB and she gave me a medication so I can start my period but at the same time she said this medication won't harm you but make your uterus lining stronger and 2 % chance of conceiving twins! She said women who tend to have spotting takes this as well to ensure that their spotting is under control. Also you stressing can cause your period to be longer that was the reason behind mine. I have type A personality so I stress about everything. Maybe that is why my period is so off all the time:)
Once you stop stressing your period will come! Hope that helps!

Mariam - posted on 08/07/2013

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HII LADIES HOWS EVERY ONE, HOPE EVERY BODYS DOING GREAT, LADIES IM A BIT CONFUSED ABOUT MY CYCLES. MY LAST CYCLE WAS OF 35 DAYS( FIRST AFTER STILLBIRTH) BUT IM STILL WAITING FOR MY SECOND IM ON DAY 42 AND NO SIGN OF AF. HAD NEGATIVE PREGNANCY TEST. IM SOO IRRITATED I JUST WANT MY CYCLES TO BE NORMAL SO THAT I CAN GET MY RAINBOW SOON. DID ANY BODY ELES HAD THESE KIND OF ERRATIC CYCLES. IM SO DEPRESSED NEED ASSURANCE.......

Cathy - posted on 08/05/2013

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Hey ladies, how are we all?? Had a really rough night last night. Missing her so much. It's weird how time heels and I am better but at the same time.....it can just take one song, one little thing to set u off and then that's it....sad for the rest of the night. But all good after a nice nights sleep.hope everyone's ttc is going well?? Xxxxxx

Mariam - posted on 08/02/2013

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hii ladies how is every one, i guess Lana is right every body do get busy in summers, hey cathy whats up dear??
any good news from any body yet?

Cathy - posted on 08/02/2013

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Hey lana, oh uz all suck. It's winter here. Ha. I'm good, just busy at work with my bosses away in America. Running the salon....soooo frikn busy. I can't wait to be on holidays. Soooo jealous of hubby not working from finishing at holdens,.....he could at least clean the house for me. Grrrr. Hope ur well Hun? Xxxxxxx

Lana - posted on 08/01/2013

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Hey Cathy
Its summer time! i think everyone is on vacation or gardening :)
how have you been? Hope all is good with you!

Cathy - posted on 07/31/2013

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Hey beautiful lady's, where has everyone gone?? Hope all is ok?? Thinking of u all. Xxxxx

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