My baby girl was murdered.

Kerry - posted on 12/20/2012

I'm so so sorry to hear of this tragedy.. Don't blame yourself! U didn't no this was going to happen.. I can tell just by reading how much u loved ur child! I cannot believe ur husband took ur other children and left u alone after going through this. This is a truly tragic story I have just read and again I'm so sorry.. U should fight for ur kids because u love them, it shows hun.. It wasn't your fault. Lots of love and best wishes and stay strong for urself and ur kids! Xx

Rhonda - posted on 12/18/2012

My child was murdered as well. He was 21. It's been 4 years and it still semms like yesterday. Everyday is hard but some days are better than other"s. May he rest in peace and to everyone who ost some one t murdere you are in my prayers

Jessica - posted on 02/28/2012

My baby girl was almost murdred by the grace of God she was saved. She was 10 months old and was supposed to be taken care of by my "bff". This is a long and crazy story but if you need someone to talk to I would love for you to email me jsouth2822@yahoo.com.

Fiona - posted on 10/25/2009

theese storys are so sad i am thinking of all of you god bless rip to all who passed xo

Ellen - posted on 10/23/2009

I am so very sorry for your loss. Losing a child in any circumstance is hard, but what you are going through is unexplainable. I lost my daughter 15 mins after she was born. She had a defect in which we knew she would not live, but I had to carry her to term due to FL laws. All I can say is that support groups, conseling and friends/family are the best....Just remember, IT WAS NOT your fault, your daughters I'm sure know how much pain you are in and that you love them with all your heart. God Bless!

Paula - posted on 10/20/2009

I am so sorry for your loss and for what is going on ....how hard this must be but like the others have said, please seek counselling. I can tell you it has saved me this year talking to someone and venting off the feeling of dispair and hurt. The pain becomes more that what wee can bear....and someone needs to help you open and let it out. You are not at fault for any of this....please don`t ever think so.

Kristal - posted on 10/20/2009

It will get worse before it gets better. At least in my experience. I lost my son due to misscarriage only to deliver his twin sister a little over a week later. She died a month later. Its been 11 1/2 years. I dreaded the past year and still do. I delivered b/g twins last August and still worry that something will happen to my only surviving girl. I have 4 wonderful children now and I'm only afraid for her. Like I don't get to keep a girl. I have had 8 misscarriages and we know that 5 of them were supposed to be girls. You will get through this. And You are Not Crazy. They are. You are allowed to grieve.

Angie - posted on 10/20/2009

My infant son was also murdered by his babysitter. He was 5 1/2 months old. I know exactly how you are feeling. Children Services stepped in and tried to take away our 3 other kids because they said that they thought that we were responsible for his injury. Initally, we were not allowed to have unsupervised contact with our kids for the first 4 months after Trevor's death. We had to have a family member stay with our kids every moment for 4 months straight. It was horrible to have to "monitored" but it deffinately could have been a lot worse. Thankfully, the judge did not place our children into temp. foster care. I know that the sherrifs dept is still investigating and are hoping to have an arrest soon. It is so hard to understand why these kind of things take so long. Trevor passed away July 8, 2008. This has been very hard on all of us. The sherrif dept even went as far as saying in the paper that we refused to take lie detector tests about Trevor's injury when THEY were the ones who gave us those tests 2 days after his death and then they refused to release or tell us the results. I felt like I was living in some sort of twilight zone or there was some sort of conspiracy going on. We live in a very small town and we were so publically blamed for Trevor's death from the very beginning, but now that the sherrifs dept realizes that they were wrong with their original investigation, they are not speaking of it at all. It is so hard going any where in this town because I know there are people looking at me like I am a murderer. I know I have to stay strong and keep one foot in front of the other. I realize that my life will never be the same again but I have to believe that my life will move forward. I wish you the best and hope that you will be able to live a happy life again. I know Emmy would want you to be happy again.

Debbie - posted on 10/20/2009

Libby - I to am dealing with what I call "grief like no other". To have your child taken from you by murder is incomprehensible. My son who was 29 years old (still by baby) was murdered in FL by an 81 year old neighbor. The murderer had harrassed and cursed my son's 9 year old son and my son went out to confront him and he shot him 3 times. Our case is also pending trial because it happened in April of this year. The grieving process is such a roller coaster of emotions that you do find it hard to face another day without your child. I turned to an organization called Parents of Murdered Children (POMC) which has helped me tremendously. You are with people who have gone through the same thing and can give you guidance. I find bonding with people who have experienced something similar to what you have gone through gives you the support you so need. You are also given support throughout the court proceedings. This group is not only for parents of murdered children, but for parents who have lost their children in any manner. If you are interested you can check online for a chapter near you. I pray to God that he will provide stength for all of you moms to get through this "grief like no other."

Fiona - posted on 10/18/2009

im so sorry for your lose, words are hard to use, i found it hard to read as i started to cry. may she rest in peace



love fiona

Tammy - posted on 10/17/2009

My heart goes out to each of you....please accept my deepest condolences. And Libby, you did NOTHING wrong. I hope you can find some counseling to get you through this horrific time. Talking to people helps, but I, too, find that most don't want to talk anymore. We get told to move forward......I find that to be insulting and insensitive.



My daughter was murdered January 5th this year. The details I have received make me sick to my stomach, but I just need to know. I keep going for my other children, but who can really let this go? She was 26 and had a 7-yr-old son who lives with his father. Nobody should have to live through this hell.....Blessings to All~

Julie - posted on 10/16/2009

my daughter was also murdered ....i found her dead next to her father(my husband) he was passed out...i won't go into too much detail because there hasn't been a trial yet but i guilt myself to death almost everyday..it's really hard, i trusted him completely and he was very good with my other daughter(his stepchild) so i could have never seen this coming...I don't know what to tell you because i haven't figured it out myself but i will pray for you i find that prayer helps me out a lot...and the antidepressants and my therapist...i am so sorry for your loss.. i know exactly how you feel

Shannon - posted on 10/01/2009

I have two girls by different fathers. When my little baby girl died of SIDS, DHS tried to convince my older daughters father I was an unfit mother and let it happen. I am blessed my first baby was with a good guy whom told the DHS workers to fu** off, and that he would never take my other daughter away from me, especially in my worst time ever. I can't say it ever gets better-half my heart is buried in the ground. I don't know if it helps any, just wanted to vent.

Lisa - posted on 09/29/2009

I have read your stories and my heart goes out to all of you. I lost my daughter 21 years ago when she was 3 to a drunk driver. It was 10 am and his only comment was "why are they in the street?" We were on the sidewalk. I went through the trial and his laugh of a sentence. I went through a divorce and even contemplated suicide. But I had a 2 year old boy to raise. I started a career where I could help people, got remarried, and had 2 more children (both girls). I have tried to help my son deal with "survivor's guilt" and the trauma of witnessing such a horrific accident. Together we made a special spot in the backyard with a bench and rose bushes. This is where I go mainly, but the kids too, to talk to Becky or just sit to feel her with me. I miss her just as much today as I did 12/07/87. Even though the pain has gotten easier to handle, I still cry many nights for her. These techniques worked for me and may not work for everyone. I hope and pray that you all can find some peace in your lives.

Casey - posted on 09/27/2009

wow. i dont think it ever gets better. my son was born preterm and he died and it doesnt get better. but for you to know that it was so violent and so ....well i think that anger and hurt will rip at you forever. there arent many people who will understand unless they have lost a child. you feel crazy , and helpless and like theres no purpose. crazy definitely . it was all i could do to force myself to feed my kids after my sons death, i certainly couldnt care for myself. im so sorry for what happened. if you need anything.....let me know

Alisha - posted on 09/27/2009

My son was also murdered just over two years ago when he went for a weekend visit with his 'dad'. We are still waiting for trial but his 'sperm donor' is charged with first degree murder which carries a sentence of 40 to life. I understand where you are coming from, I trusted him to take care of him! My son had been shaken an beaten an then left lay unconcious for at least 4 hours before they called an ambulance. I had to then fight for custody of my younger daughter who had been there when it happened an for my visitation rights to my oldest who lives with his dad. They took my daughter the day after Devin's funeral an I didn't see her for 3 days an then couldn't take her home or be alone with her for another 2 weeks. My family keeps telling me that I have to forgive him for me but I don't think that is possible! I think the hardest part is when my other kids come to me an ask when they will see him again an why he had to die... If it wasn't for almost losing my daughter to the state right after he died I really don't think I would have made it. An really her an my boys are the only reason I pull myself out of bed most days.... without me my daughter has nobody at all!!

Bets - posted on 09/24/2009

the guilt you feel is completely normal. You trusted this man, and he took one of the most precious things away from you. You are not alone in these feelings. Seek out a good therapist, or on-line support group. Talk to your friends and family. Don't try to do this on your own.



My 5 year old grandson died after he fell out of a 3rd story window earlier this month. He fell 32 feet onto the cement. It was a complete accident - he was leaning against the screen to see the kids outside and the screen let go. But the guilt is still there. My daughter lives with it every day too.



you still have your memories, and NO ONE can take those. You also know what kind of mother you were to her. Don't let them tarnish those thoughts. Fight against the feelings you have.



You are in my thoughts. Best of luck.

Julie - posted on 09/23/2009

I 'm so sorry...My little girl was murdered by her father and i feel guilty everyday it happened last month and I'm just trying to make it day by day

Donna - posted on 06/14/2009

Death leaves a heatache no one can heal! Love leaves memories no one can steal! You will always be your babies mama, so just do good by the other children and make her proud! My son took his own life on 1-13 09. he drank irrespomsibly. Nobody made me feel responsible, but I do understand that time just makes us miss them that much more. It is hard when other people seem to move on and we are STUCK in our greif. It is hard to understand why these things happen, but we are mot alone. I am so sorry for your loss. I beleive we all have our time and for some reason my son and your daughters time was short. I love the song by Kenny Chesney " who youd be today!" I will keep you in my prayers.

Tonya - posted on 06/05/2009

I totally understand how you are feeling, I lost my 16 yr old son to an electrical accident almost 2 yrs ago. The police looked at me like I had done something to him. They went through their investigation and figured out that it was an unfortunate accident. It is peoples first instinct to automatically point the finger at the parents, even when it is clearly obvious that it wasn't them. My prayers are with you and your family and I hope the man (and I use that term loosely because any male who does that to a child is not a man) who did that to your baby girl, gets exactly what he deserves.

As for getting better, It has been almost 2 yrs for me and I have had countless people tell me that time heals all wounds, That is a wound that can NEVER be healed. I will not say that it gets easier, it just gets less painful as time goes by.

Tabatha - posted on 06/05/2009

oh my hun you are not in the wrong your daughter was killed and i couldn't imagin what you are going through, i would be dieing inside, i am very sorry and i sure your other 2 daughters love you and feel your pain and mourn for their sister and you, i know right now they may not understand but in time they sure will.

Libby - posted on 05/26/2009

Julie, what Libby has described sounds as intentional murder. Her child was shaken and we all know what that does to a child. I can't imagine having to deal with that. Libby, I think that perhaps some deep therapy would be good for you right now.

Julie - posted on 05/26/2009

My son passed away at a friend's house at 18 months when I was at work. My husband and I were blamed for his death and we had to wait 3 months to find out how he died. I believe they thought they did the best they could after he hit his head, because they had a son of their own the same age. I know they were more nervous and scared and hoped nothing bad was going to happen and it did. As far as the word murder, I agree, you probably feel it so strongly right now but I feel that word is for intentional harm. If it was, I hope it can be proved, if it wasn't intentional, I hope he did the best he could have done at the time. It is very hard to deal with the loss of a child, you're not crazy, you're just going through a lot right now, emotions, court, trying to love your children, wondering why...Just take time to heal. Be around supportive people... A counseling group really helps, not judgmental and very caring. Having custody taken away doesn't mean you're a bad mom, there is just a lot to deal with and the first person that needs the most caring is yourself to get through everything until you are a little better. The pain never goes away completely but it gets better. You will get through this, be strong.

Terry - posted on 05/25/2009

Since YOU did nothing WRONG ... quit letting other people's opnions to so sway your world, hon. Remember, opinions are like a**holes, everyone has one! But that does not mean they're all working right! Some people just like playing the blame game, and to do so to YOU, of all people, should tell you how terrible they are. As far as your other girls go - they KNOW what kind of mommy they had and have. They might not be in your care now, and frankly, they might not NEED to be, if as you say, you are not getting any better. You DO have the right to see them, get into counseling so you have a good chance to get them back --- and to get your own marbles back, too! When my child died, and it was NOTHING compared to what you have endured, I felt so incredibly guilty; it was only due to my baby son that I was able to return to the land of the living. I had to force myself to do more than go thru the motions of being Mommy. Had to force myself to get on the floor and play cars, to go to the park, to church, etc ... when all i WANTED to do was climb in bed, pull the covers over my head and sleep til doomsday. BUT ... where did that leave my son?? I fought back by jumping thru their hoops about 'recovery' even though I still do not believe you EVER really recovery. The pain remains, it just gets more private. Take care of YOU now ... the girls will come back after YOU are ready, two yrs or ten. Thy love you. You know that. No one can take that away. Good luck, hon. And get into grief counseling.- FAST.