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Need help dealing with women who are pregnant

Erin - posted on 11/29/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I lost my baby when I was 18 weeks pregnant and found out there was no heartbeat. I honored my baby boy with a funeral and everything. Even though he was born still, he was and always will be a part of our family.

Since this devastating news, I've had to switch jobs (not voluntarily . . . I'm a teacher, and I got involuntarily moved to a new school). At this new school, it seems like EVERYONE is pregnant. It is like a giant slap in the face. Especially, since no one knows what we went through earlier this year (September 2011). It seems like every time I blink, someone else I know is pregnant.

I want to be happy for them all, but I'm still so upset that this happened to me and my family. I so want to be pregnant and fear that it won't happen as quickly as it has in the past (I got pregnant with my daughter--who's 2 after the 2nd month of trying and pregnant with my angel son on the first try). I just wish that I was pregnant too so that I could share in the joy that so many others are feeling. I'm struggling with why this happened to us. Does anyone else feel this way? Does anyone have suggestions as to how to get through it?

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3 Comments

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Carmen - posted on 01/02/2012

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i had the same problem, i suffered 3 miscarriges and was told i would never have kids. i avoided ALL pregnant women and was really rude. i regret it but i think they will understand. its a hard thing to go though but you need to allow yourself grieving time. and one day you may decide to have another baby and it might not hurt as bad. good luck and im sorry for your loss

Ikia - posted on 12/23/2011

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Hey Erin I know how you feel. I was 9 weeks pregnant when my mother forced me to get an abortion. It has been really hard since then me and my boyfriend are steadily trying to get through it day by day. But I am the same way when I am at work and a pregnant women walks up for help it kills me inside to look at her or even a infant child. But think of it this way you have children that I believe love you no matter. Be blessed because now there is a chance because of my blood type I wont be able to have children anymore and I get this news now and im only 18yrs old. So just try and get through it be strong and look past it.

Belinda - posted on 12/18/2011

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Just try to look past it. You dont need to look at their stomach while you talk to them, look at their faces. I know how you feel my son was born still at 21 weeks and without word of a lie 7 of my friends got pregnant after and two of the are due within days of my sons anniversary. Inside I am bitter and torn apart and when i think about it it cuts me up and i end up a blubbering mess. But they are my friends its not their fault ive been through what I have and they deserve their own happiness. Whilst some dont have the decency to not go on about scans etc in front of me I just zone out on it. Go blank and think about something else. Its all that keeps me sane.

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