Kelli - posted on 12/18/2009 ( 11 moms have responded )
Hello, My name is Kelli and I am new to this site so first off I wanted to introduce myself. I had a stillborn July 1st of this year and it has been tough and almost impossible to deal with. I have a healthy 18 month old boy but I still feel so empty and lonley. But getting to my point... I was un able to bury my still born daughter. I had a small family get together right afterwords, but for whatever reason I chose not to bury her. My main reason was I just simply could not afford it since I am a single mother. This is my biggest regret ever! I recently took a friend of mine to the cemetary to visit her grandpa. While I was there I ran into a tombstone of a stillborn! This has been messing with my mind ever since. I wish I had some place to go visit my daughter. All I have is a few blankets of hers that I kept and they allowed me to take pictures of her in the hospital. Does anyone else have this problem... and how do you get over it... is there a certain thing you do when you just want to talk to your angel. I have been able to talk to a member of my church and the only advice they gave was that God knows my heart and so does my babygirl and they both know I would have burried her if I was able to. This does help, but it still does not make it right in my mind. Sorry if i rambled on but I am just a mess right now especially because this is the first christmas without her. I am very greatful for my son and he is the only thing that is giving me reason to go on at this point, but its still soooo empty, lonly and sad without my daughter.