Something to share on my son's birthday with you all, if you don't mind

Rachael - posted on 09/16/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

This is the eulogy I wrote for Marcus, who was born premature and died after 2 hours. The minister read it at his funeral for me, no way I would have been able to read it aloud. In retrospect, it's a bit much??? really, but obviously I was in a lot of shock and pain when I wrote it. Anyway, 2 years on today, I wanted to share this with any other grieving Mummy out there, this space on facebook has been important to me - hope you don't mind. Love rach xxx



"There are too many things we will never know about John Marcus. We will never know the colour of his eyes or the sound of his voice. We'll never know if he was shy with new people or cheeky and friendly to strangers in shopping lines. We'll never see him on adventures with his father or chasing behind his sister and cousins.



But we are blessed enough to know some things about him in the few hours that knew him.



We know that as small as he was, he was strong and fought to live, and that his spirit was bigger than his body.

He had his mother's ears but for the rest he was the image of his father. He had long artistic hands and big footballer feet.

We know that he heard the voices he already knew best - his father's mother's and sister's.

We know he felt the loving hands of his father mother sister and Aunt Lauren. We know his life was witnessed by his Uncle Craig and sister Laura's father. We have to believe he was still close enough by to feel his grandmothers Jan and Jane, his grandfather Neil and his Aunt Rebekah.

He heard his mother sing to him and he knows he was her sunshine. And he heard the words of the Lorax, which everyone everyone everyone needs.



Everything else - the first ball he kicked, the laughter he shared, the tantrums he threw, the bad dream and comfort his mum and dad gave him, the blocks he built and knocked over, the first time he counted to 10 and the first girl he ever kissed, the hugs from his many family and friends, his visits back to England, the chocolate bowls he licked clean, the mud on his hands and his first day at school - everything else we will have to know in our hearts and dreams. Everything else is for us to create and imagine and believe to be true.



Thank you to everyone here who came to say goodbye."