struggling lately

Danielle - posted on 07/22/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )




its coming up on 2 years in sept...when my dauther Hope Charisma died at 36 weeks pregnant from a knot in her cord...she was my third beautiful baby girl and looked just like her sisters...i've been having such a rough time lately. i keep thinking about her and wishing she was here i loved her so much and miss her so deeply...i believe my daughter is with the Lord and so happy i just hate missing her so much...

4 days shy of a year after she was born i gave birth to a beautful baby boy...he is awesome! and a true gift and makes me so happy everyday...i just wish i could have all my kids here with me. she was so beautful and perfect...i'm just so sad lately and people keep saying oh itll get better with time..but i dont see that happening and when they say that i just wanna scream " you dont get better when your child dies!" ... they have no clue and i know they ar trying to help but they arent helping...i know i need to let go of this pain but i feel like crying almost everyday still..usually after everyone goes to bed. i want my baby back soo much...i'm crying right now..i hate this horrible pain i feel.

sorry i just really needed to vent to people that know what i am going through.

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Grace - posted on 07/23/2010




im crying right now reading this i lost my baby boy Jordan Tyler on june 30th 2010 and im completly devasted i was 36weeks im hurting and i feel lost and im in pain im having a really rough time he looks just like my husband and daughter when she was a baby shes 4now looking at them everyday reminds me of him i agree with you 100% on the whole it'll get better i want to scream also and rip there face off lol but im sure it does get better but everyone is different and it takes time but i hope it does get better for you we lost a baby and that is the hardest thing i think a mother can ever go thru i cry everyday and at night when everyone goes to bed. i say everyday to my husband when he sees me crying i just want my baby back he belongs with me its not fair i miss him so much its always good to cry so let it out dont hold it in because you will drive yourself mad vent netime you feel the need us mothers will always listen it felt good reading your story thats exactly how i feel and thank you because i just vented good luck to you and your family and sorry for your loss

Brenda - posted on 07/22/2010




I am sorry you are struggling lately. Grief ebbs and flows just like life. It has only been two years since you lost your baby girl, with time it does "get better", but truly better is just your new normal. I too cringe when people say it will get better, or they see my new children and tell me it's great that I've moved on. No one ever moves on from loosing a child. Truly people just don't know what to say. I still don't know what I want people to say. There are no words or gestures that will bring back our children. Just acknowledge we live in constant grief, wondering what would have been of our children.

It has been 6 years since my first son was stillborn at 39 weeks due to a cord accident. I still think of him everyday and miss him as if it were the first hour without him. I have stopped crying everyday but that has only been recently. The hole in our hearts will never be filled, we will always long for our child. Remember your sweet baby girl, remember every detail. You are very blessed to have another child. Be strong, there are so many support groups, maybe just knowing others in your shoes would help you as much as it has helped me.

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