today, my baby would have been a year old.

Lorraine - posted on 10/02/2012

Hi all - sadly I share the same feeling. I have a 3 year old boy. Last year november I gave birth to my 2nd son, around his 10th day of life he start having a kind a blue-ish color. After going to the doctor they diagnost him with a born heart disseas. After operating him he got some complications and passed away. He was one a half month old at that time. Now november is almost here and it seems like everything is comming back. I had some tough times since he passed away but it suddenly seems like I was in kind of denial and suddenly reality slaps me in the face. My 3 year old son asks me everyday for his lil brother and when I tell him he's' with God now he askis me why we can't also go with them. So I alo have to deals with his questions as well. Its very hard and I'm not sure how to deal with all at the same time. I guess time and prayers will be the only thing which will help us all get through thee tough times. I found this quote a couple of days ago and thought maybe it will help you in some way: "An Angel in the book of life wrote down my baby's birth. And whispered as she closed the book "too beautiful for earth."

Linda - posted on 09/30/2012

Tendai,

It will get better with time, prayer, support... That doesn't mean that you won't have days where you just want to curl up in a ball and cry, but over time the gaping wound in your heart will heal. Right now the wound is raw with all the nerves exposed and the slightest thought is enough to cause pain. As you make it through the grief, over time and with practice you will start being able to think and even say things that right now put you in tears. Slowly the wound will scab over and become less sensitive. You will always bear a scar in your heart (it has been 15 years for me) and your baby will always be a part of who you are. You can and will heal.

Linda

Tendai - posted on 09/28/2012

Thank you Sharon, I am trying to get help and support. I am just dying inside. I pray it will get better. Bless you and the soul of your little boy.

Sharon - posted on 09/19/2012

I am so sorry for your loss, please don't blame yourself, there are many here that understand what your are feeling including myself, we are all here to support you okay. I share this experience, for me it will 3 years since my son died, and with many prayers and support I am here today, I didn't think at first I would make it either, but I reached out for help and there are so many here that will support and help you in this time of your life. Keep reaching out for support and little by little you will get stronger, with prayers of comfort for you and your family, Sharon H.