We lost two babies in 16½ months.....

Shea - posted on 01/30/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

My name is Shea. I have 3 daughters here on Earth, Shannon (My gift from my husband when we married) who is 27, Kayla who is 23 and Marygrace who is 13. In December of 2006 I was pleasently surprised with a positive pregnancy test. This would be my husband and my first child together. We were over joyed and excited. It was the best pregnancy I had ever had, I felt great and had no complications as I had while pregnant with Kayla and Marygrace. Then at 3 AM on June 23rd, when I was 29½ weeks pregnant our world started to fall apart. I went into labor, I at first thought it was Braxton-Hicks and tried to wait it out. At 6:15 I was spotting and having contractions every 15 mins. We went to the hospital and they tried to stop the labor and it was no use, she was coming. I was stressed and nervous, but at 29½ weeks, I thought everything would be OK...My then 11 year old was born at 25 weeks 1 day and she was healthy and completely fine now. I delivered her and she came out kicking and moving, I started hemoraging and they gave me something to make me sleep and the last thing I remember was seeing her moving her little arms. When I came to, the neonatologist was beside my bed. I was expecting him to say that she was on a vent, etc....but, instead he took my hand and said he was sorry...we had lost Olivia. They couldn't understand why they couldn't get her to breathe and so they did an autopsy and found that I had some how contracted Listeria and it attacked her lungs and liver. We were heartbroken.

12 months later I was excited to find out I was again pregnant. We had a couple of scary moments in the beginning with spotting but, everything seemed to be going well. At 17 weeks I felt her move for the first time and she never seemed to stop. She was the most active baby I had ever carried. We thought everything was going to be wonderful this time. We named her Alessia and were happily planning her nursery. On Novemeber 11th at 23 weeks, I had an appointment with the high risk specialist. The night before she was moving all over the place, but when they did the sonogram, there was something wrong. The sono tech went and got the doctor, whom I hadn't met before, and she looked at the sonogram and said, "I'm sorry, your baby's gone" . I freaked out and called my husband at work and we called my regular OB and they had me come right to the office. I wanted my doctor to tell me it was a mistake...but, she was gone. They induced me the next day and at 7:30 AM my tiny little girl was delivered. She had a true knot in her cord and then had managed to tangle herself up to the point she had basically hung herself.

So, now, we are again dealing with the heart break. Both the babies were as my doctor said, "Healthy and beautiful" until they each were taken by a fluke thing.

So, we are hoping that we will once again get blessed with a pregnancy and that it will be healthy and have a beautiful, healthy outcome. But, I am 42 and my husband is 51, so, we are not sure if it will happen again.

Some days I feel like curling up and dying. I miss my babies so badly. Anyway, that's my story.