Will they listen to me this time?

Michelle - posted on 12/10/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I was a week before my due date when I went to "the appointment." we didnt get a heart beat. I was devastated immediately. the doctors said a prayer over me and sent me directly to the hospital. there they confirmed the worst, i wanted so bad for them to be wrong. they admitted me and that night they induced my labor. I had her at 5:09AM dec, 19, she was 5ibs 6oz her name was raylynnd marie. she was perfect. for months i couldnt wait to have her. one, because i wanted to hold her against my chest as she slept and just feel her and love her. two, i was tired of being pregnant. i had a bad pregnancy, i was sick almost the entire time and had high blood pressure at the end. I knew things werent right, thought i had a stroke dec, 2 and they just wrote me off. apparently goodsam was packed with the high risk patients that night. i went in because i lost some use of my left hand and leg i was affraid i had a stroke. When i got there they hooked me up to monitors where they saw baby wasnt responding to well so they put me on fluids with sugar. rthey did tests that showed i did in fact lose use of my left limbs. they did and ultra spund said my placenta was calcified, saw a heartbeat, diagnosed me with carpitunnel and sent me home. later that week i had my appointment, at this time i still hadnt had an appointment every week and i was 34 weeks. there i told them again the baby wasnt moving. my blood pressure was really high. they sent me home a bottle to pee in and scheduled me back in two weeks. About 1 week later i couldnt sleep, kept feeling like i was smothering and couldnt feel baby move. I was told it was because i was close to my due date. dec 18 was the two weeks and thats when we couldnt find the heartbeat. If they would have just listened to me this situation probably could have been avoided. I half believe its because of the insurance i carried because it was through the state. maybe i would have been more important in their eyes if i paid privately for my insurance. I dont know. You get a lot of mixed feelings and thoughts when something like this happens.



Im now pregnant again, and im nervous. I have different doctors this time around and i hope theywill take me more serious. Im only 12 weeks and have a very long way to go. this is hard and very scary. Its a little to soon to be pregnant again

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6 Comments

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Natasha - posted on 12/19/2009

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keep strong ! and keep asking question and don't be afraid to ask for a second opinion stay strong! and positive

Teresa - posted on 12/16/2009

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YES! Make sure your partner is in with you! My husband kept saying, "stop you're gonna get in trouble". Really? Are you kidding? This is our CHILD! Man up, you are a jerk any other time.

Teresa - posted on 12/16/2009

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I know about feeling like it is too soon to be pregnant again! Just a thought, the next time nobody will listen, use it, get mad! Do not be afraid to yell. I actually "fired" an OB nurse at the hospital once. I told her to get me a new nurse immediately. If you go to the hospital and no one is listening, get a new doctor. No matter where you go, there will be another doctor somewhere. Start calling out of the phone book if you have to. Make sure you let them know this is your child and your body and you know when something is wrong! BTW, it was my 7th pregnancy of no one listening to me to get than mad, so I know it's not always easy. If you need to, find a mouthy friend or family member to help you out. =) Good luck hon.

Emer - posted on 12/16/2009

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IM SO SORRY FOR OU SAD LOSS I 2LOST MY FIRST CHILD JUST A COUPLE OF DAYS B4 MY DUE,I FELF TAT THE HOSPITAL DIDNT LISTEN EITHER I FELT LIKE SOMETHING WAS WRONG BUT THEY JUST BRUSHED ME OFF WEN I WENT BACK IN 4DAYS LATER WE DISCOVERED MY BABY HAD DIED.WIT MY NEXT PREG I GOT D HIGH RISK CONSULTANT I DEMANDED REG SCANS& CHECKUPS AT 37WKS THEY INDUCED ME COZ I WAS SO ANXIOUS THANKFULLY I HAD A HEALTHY LIL BOY WIT MY NEXT PREG I DEMANDED THE SAME TREATMENT I GOT 38WKS WEN MY WATERS LEAKED THEY WUD NOT AVE BROUGHT ON MY LABOUR IF I DIDNT HAVE A PRVIOUS STIIBIRTH SO U CALL ALL D SHOTS HUN TIS IS UR BABY BEST OF LUCK&I NO UL HAVE A HEALTHY BABY TIS TIME XXX

Heather - posted on 12/11/2009

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First of all I am so so very sorry for your loss. But also congrats on the new pregnancy!

I lost my son May 8th, 2009 it was 12 days before my due date. I was also at a normal appointment and no heartbeat was found. Two weeks prior I told them about my drop in fetal movement and I got the brush also of 'your near labor' it was the worst experience...I hated my doctor before I lost my baby as I was told I was gaining to much weight and lectured over the conversation about my drop in movement.

I am also pregnant again. It is number 4...I have a daughter who is 3 in Feb, miscarriage at 8 weeks, a fullterm stillborn son, and now 20 weeks with another boy. I havent seen that doctor since the day my son was born. My new doctor and rn-p that I see seem to be very understanding. I am on highrisk now but last appointment I asked for ultrasound and she ordered it just to set my mind at ease. I hope you can find a doctor also that attempts to understand what your going through. If you want to talk write me. This has been the scariest thing I have gone through, mentally it just seems unbearable. I compare everything and well worry like crazy! Your not alone-hang in there!

Trish - posted on 12/10/2009

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Firstly, I want to say I'm so sorry for your lose and the trauma that you had involving it.



All I can suggest this time round is if you are unhappy or nervous about anything don't budge until you're happy with the answer they give you. I know it's hard and they treat us a bit like cattle at times, but you or your partner need to stand up and shout and scream if they won't listen to you.



I would suggest that you sit down with your doctors at your next appointment, if you haven't done so already, and tell them what happened and how you felt you were sidelined with your requests etc. Gauge their response and if you feel you'll get a similar reaction from them then change doctors again.



I was fortunate that I found a wonderful doctor when I was pregnant with my first daughter and explained to him about my son etc. He made sure that I was happy with everything every step of the way and would speak to me on the phone if I had a question to ask him.



Good luck and I hope you have some really wonderful and supportive doctors around you this time round.

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