worried about next pregnancy!!!!

Jocinda - posted on 01/21/2010

thanks but im finding it so hard to trust the doctors as with my last pregnacy with my son all the way they said he was healthy and there was nothing to worry about his heart beat was so strong his movements were so strong even the scans showed nothing was wrong then i went into labour at 24 weeks i went into labour with him and he passed away at half hour old and my poor lil boy had so much wrong with him so many disabilitys the midwifes were so daffled every thing should have been seen on the scans but they did not pick anything up even when i was in labour they said everything will be ok so it shall be so hard to trust the doctors and midwifes x

Dawn - posted on 01/19/2010

I completely understand where you are. Our son was stillborn in second trimester in July '08. We're at the point now where we want to try again, but it's SCARY! I am so worried something will happen again, even though my OB and high risk doctor assure me it's unlikely.



Honestly, I don't think that fear ever goes away completely. I think you have to focus on the good parts of the experience and not go nuts worrying about what might happen. Trust your doctors, trust your instincts. Know that you aren't alone in how you feel.

Kerrin - posted on 01/19/2010

I'm in the same boat.
Hubby & I have had a miscarriage @6 weeks & a stillbirth @36 weeks (our daughter was born Jan 09) & we've decided to TTC again. We so want children & while we're excited to think about our next pregnancy, part of me is really nervous. We have almost no chance of the same complications that we had with our daughter but it's still nerve wracking. I think it always is for any of us who have lost a child. All we can do I guess is get all the info we can depending on circumstances, have open communication with our partners & do what we feel is right for us in our hearts.

Jocinda - posted on 01/19/2010

thanks ladys me and my husband are still talking and were going 2 c the doctors. thank you again you have all been so much help x

Victoria - posted on 01/16/2010

My daughter was still born at 20 weeks after she died from a knot in her umbillical cord. That was May 06. I was desperate to get pregnant again. Then 6 months later we got pregnant again and had a very early miscarriage (6.5 wks). Blew my mind. Couldn't believe it would happen to us after losing our daughter. It took a while after that for us to try again. We did get pregnant the summer of 07 and I gave myself shingles at 8 weeks because I was so worried and stressed about it. I rented a doppler from bellybeats.com and that was a great comfort to us. We got to 20 weeks and I thought my fears would subside, only to find out that our little one had a slow rate of growth, eventually diagnosed with IUGR (intrauterine growth retardation). We had to have u/s every 2 to 3 weeks to check growth and at 32 weeks started going in 2x a week for fetal monitoring. At our 37 week appt, the dr did an u/s and our baby showed no growth from the u/s 2 weeks prior, so he set up a c-section for that night. It was terribly stressful and terrifying, and I completely believe that if we had not been monitored so closely because of our previous loss, our baby would have died. As it was, she is 21 months old now, little, but completely healthy. I am 18 weeks pregnant and have tried very hard this time to treat this as a "normal" pregnancy. I worry, but try to push it aside. I have worried much less this time, but panic every once in a while! I don't know that I will ever feel the same "carfree bliss" I felt with my 1st two, knowing now how many things can and do go wrong. And pessimisticly, I know that if something does go wrong, I am much better prepared to deal with the decisions we will have to make... All this to say that you probably won't every be ready, not like you were before. You have to decide if its worth taking the chance, however slim it may be. It was worth if for us, and I'm thankful for our toddler and for however much time I get with the little one inside me... I hope our story helps you figure out what you need to do.

Leanne - posted on 01/16/2010

i lost my son a year ago on 23rd jan after 4 days i would like more children but i am also worried that something could happen i have been told there is a 1 in 3 million chance of any babies i have in the future having the same problems my son had dextro cardia if you arevery worried i suggest seeing your doctor to discuss about any problems or worrys they may be able to help and give you advice hope this helps

Rebecca - posted on 01/15/2010

I'm sorry about your loss. Same thing happened to me my son CJ died 2 days after he was born. We got pregnant about 2 years later and had a healthy baby girl, who just turned 2. It is going to be hard not to worry. The Dr kept track of me more, I called them all the time. My Dr. told me that 1 year before we were gonna start trying again I should start taking prenatal vitamins, that would help prepare my body for the pregnancy. I don't know how your pregnancy was with your son but I had problems with my son CJ around 20 wks so I know when I hit that milestone I felt a huge relief. I don't know if your a religous person or not but believe that God does not give you more than you can handle and that i felt that God wanted us to have her when we did because I was on Birth Control when we got pregnant. Good Luck and I hope everything works out for you and your husband.