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Jenny - posted on 06/22/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I had a baby boy 10yrs ago and gave him up for adoption ( i was very young), I got married 5yrs ago and have had 2 children since. One is 4 and one is almost 1. I have been in contact with the birthmom all along and had visitations for the first 3 yrs. Now its up to him. Reciently I have recieved a few emails from the adoptive mom, saything that he has been asking alot of questions about me. That makes me very excited and very nervous at the same time. I love him very much and always have, I just dont want to screw anything up. I want him to have a good life, and I dont ever want him to feel abandoned or unwanted. Wondering if he will want a relationship with me or what he will decide. Anybody been here or have any words of inspiration, that would be greatly apreciated.

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Jessica - posted on 07/20/2010

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Hi, I am not a birth mom, but an adoptive mom. We have a similar relationship with our son's birth mom. She comes to church to see him about once a month (my husband is a preacher, and her aunt and uncle go to our church). She chooses to keep the visits to this, except for Christmas and his birthday (he is two), when she comes to the house. She knows she is welcome, but wants to hang back a little until he is older and see if he wants more of a relationship with her. I'm sure he will be curious about her, as your son is about you. I hope they do form a bond when he is older. Don't be nervous, just explain things to him as honestly as you can and be there to answer his questions. I'm sure the rest will come in time. I think it's great that there are birth moms like you and ours who only want the best life for their child. I hope things go well for you! Jessica

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