Laura - posted on 05/12/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )
hey guys i have a ten year old step-daughter. i have been in her life since around her 8th birthday. my hubby and i have custody during the school year, bio-mom has her for the summer and lives across the u.s. my problem is that she is SPOILED. she never had to clean her own room before and mom still cleans her room at her house. she is very lazy, leaves her dishes and garbage whereever she wants, dirty clothes on the bathroom floor. etc. i wasn't brought up this way and she is TEN. she should have chores and clean up after herself. we have a daughter who is almsot one and i think its going to be hard to teach her to clean up her own messes and have chores when her big sister doesn't do it. my husband is very lax and she knows how to work him....like when she is supposed to be cleaning her room and she keeps coming out to talk to him until he forgets. or she will say she is done and he takes her word for it. she knows she can get away with it and i have pointed out what she is doing. he is ready to sit down and we are going to make rules chores and consequences but i wanted feedback on what kinds of chores your kids do at this age. we told her once she can do her chores without being reminded ot having to re-do them she will receive an allowance (her response was she doesn't want anything, she can ask mommy or grandma if she wants something) this is not the way i want MY daughter growing up and i think it is unhealthy for her too. she should be learning responsibilty. my parenst were strict, his were not and me and my husband can't decide what to do. anybody wanna chime in?