Wanted to make sure everyone got a chance to read this...

Dana - posted on 05/10/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I came across this as I was cleaning out my personal papers, birthday cards, things that I have saved over the years because they have special meaning to me. I think it is beautiful and it makes me cry every time I read it. I hope you enjoy it too.

The Beauty of Holland (author/source unknown)

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability-to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this...


When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful vacation plans. The coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The Gondolas of Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italy. It's all very, very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The flight attendant comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland".
"Holland?!?!?!?!?", you say. "What do you mean, Holland? I signed up for Italy! I'm suppose to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for awhile and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills. Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they're bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.
But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.

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3 Comments

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Christine - posted on 05/12/2010

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dear dana, that is just so beautiful my daughter has global development delay,childhood apraxia of speech she is intellectually dissabled due 2 herhaveing a chromosone abnormality& that on itself is all new 2 me but after reading that i almost cryed bcos how true is it anyway id like 2 say a MASSIVE thanku 2 u 4 sharing that with us..we r still learning about my daughters dissability bcos wehat she has is rare she is the6th one in the world 2 have it so on fb i have started a group called chromosone abnormalities so we casn get further research & 4 pple with special needs children 2 share thier own personal experiences n pour there heart out as im always here 2 listen& once again that was beautiful thanku 4 sharing christine ((HUGS))) 2 u...

Vicki - posted on 05/12/2010

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Thank you for posting that. It is so beautiful and true. And maybe some of us are just meant to be in Holland instead because it takes some very special people to tend those beautiful tulips that make our world a more beautiful place.

Janet - posted on 05/10/2010

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WOW! That is wonderful! Thx for sharing and it brought tears to my eyes too. Great analogy. Makes you feel a little guilty fro wanting Italy huh?! But then you are so right..Holland is just as magnificent, just a bit different. Have to keep reminding myself. Thx for the beautiful reminder!