Family Fighting

Roz - posted on 02/17/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Does anyone know how to deal with the hurt feelings and overwhelming sadness you can feel when your grown child and your other child's wife are fighting so much and so fiercely that it starts pulling your family apart? If you have any ideas I would be so thankful. I am at the end of my rope. My knees are too. (from praying). I understand free agency but when I ask them to please think of the family and lets have peace, I hear about what they need. Any help anyone? rozzi

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Melody - posted on 03/09/2009

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Just to let you know you are not alone.  I have the same problem with my son's wife and my youngest daughter.. They do not get along at all.  I love them both dearly they are wonderful, but they have actually got into a fist altercation and I have heart trouble.  It saddens me that when my son and his wife and daughter come to visit they could not even stay at my house because my youngest daughter still lives at home.  I finally told her to get over it.  She says she is grown and it is my house and she is causing me great stress.  We have finally come to a baby step terms and hopefully things will smooth over soon.  It is just not fair for the rest of the family and to me it seems very selfish of them.  No peace in your own house where can you go..

Paula - posted on 02/23/2009

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I wish I had some good advice for you. I'm dealing with almost the same thing. My oldest daughter has decided that I am a monster and has told anyone who will listen that she hates me and wishes I had died instead of her father. I don't know how to fix it so I've come to live with it, but I will always love her.

Gaylene - posted on 02/21/2009

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I have 3 daughters all grown and out of the house. My 2 youngest have fought all their lives I thought they would grow out of it, but they didn't they now have nothing to do with each other and when they do the older one picks at the youngest one. They only live 4 blocks away from each other and they don't go see each other the youngest don't have a car cause her boyfriend takes it to work so she sits at home alone while her sister could come get her or even just visit for awhile. This behavior tears me apart cause I thought I brought them up to beleive family was important. I have come to the conclusion I can't make them be kind to each other and I just back off and hope that in the end they don't regret their actions later in life. So my advice to you is to let them work things out and hopefully they will realize what they are doing to you and your family. Maybe your son needs to step in say hey this is my sibling we need to get along and your oldest child just needs to accept your son's choice for a wife. Sometimes it's a jealousy thing.

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