hurtful daughters

Barbara - posted on 06/02/2009 ( 8 moms have responded )

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i have two daughters who have broken my heart ,one is to high class for her family,,and the other one has a boyfriend that uses her up,,,he don,t work and spends all her money,,

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Teresa - posted on 07/06/2009

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Kids can be very hurtful, even when they get older,married and have their own kids. I think it an authoritative issue with them, they feel they can treat us anyway they want with no remorse but........remember this, what comes around goes around and it may take some time before it goes around but I can assure you when it does you can be 100% sure it will come at the most perfect time. There is nothing like good old experience. Just sit back, swallow the hurt, one day, (speaking from experience), your kids will see the light.

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Love them unconditionally... You will be a soft shoulder for them someday... If you get too involved and negative they will leave you forever... Just listen and love them... constantly let them know you love them that's all Do Not Give Them Advice, they do not want it and will push you away harder & faster than a jack rabbit...

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Lanie - posted on 05/10/2010

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All you can do is be supportive and love them unconditionally, I experienced similar with my daughter as I also thought she acted too high class. i was wrong, she just wanted a better life for her and her daughter and when I changed my attitude towards her opinionated personality and quit taking it so personal and realized that some of it came form her own unadmitted low self esteem, tehn things changed. Whatever you do taht your daughter may not approve of -- don't lie or try to hide your behaviors or habits. Honesty is what is appreciated and then you and your daughter will have a better relationship. Do not be afraid to tell your daughters how you feel but be diplomatic about it and love the grandchildren no matter what! Ask God to guide you as you put it all in His hands!

Pam - posted on 05/07/2010

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Unlike you it is one of my sons that I have problems with,he gets hooked up with women that use him and alienates him from his family.We are ok when she kicks him out or he is hurt or not working, and needs a place to live but when he is with her we dont hear a word from him,unless he has a problem. One day they will learn mom will not always be there.

Dorothy - posted on 03/30/2010

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I know what you are going through, it happens no matter how much we think we are staying out of their business. A comment can be misconstrued to be critical of the decisions they are making. It is so difficult to let them get hurt but we can't prevent it from happening. Just know that when they really need you they will show up. Keep busy, volunteer, if possible join a health club and work out. Hope it gets better for you.

Joan - posted on 03/18/2010

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Not sure if you want a reply or not, but here goes. I have 4 grown daughters who have pretty much made their own decisions. Their decisions were pretty close to what I would have done in their circumstances, but of course we think NOONE is good enough for OUR children. LOL

Georgia (Jade) - posted on 07/07/2009

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I understand how you feel!! Although I dont have any daughters...I do have 3 sons...and they have all hurt me at some time or another in different ways. I try hard to be there for them and even though soem of them might not think so...I try VERY hard to stay out of their business. That one can be a real toughy though when I know they are going down a very bad road and I just want to help them thru my own experience so that they dont hurt themselves so much.

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Love them unconditionally... You will be a soft shoulder for them someday... If you get too involved and negative they will leave you forever... Just listen and love them... constantly let them know you love them that's all Do Not Give Them Advice, they do not want it and will push you away harder & faster than a jack rabbit...

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