Divya - posted on 06/27/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )
Divya - posted on 06/27/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )
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Sinclairbrooks - posted on 08/02/2012
I have never felt guilty or felt the need to have another child (I had my son when I was 40 - and he was planned after several years of marriage). I have a 5 year old son and he is and will be an only child. He has never brought up the issue of wanting a sibling or asking if he was going to have a sibling. He is well adjusted, well mannered, polite.. He is very social & loves to play with other kids (just about any age), Mom & Dad. He also enjoys playing by himself & has quite the imagination. I pick him up from daycare around 2:30 in the afternoon (3:20 from school once he starts Kindergarten this year) & his dad gets home around 4:45, so that time between is usually filled with us talking, having a snack, "hanging out", him helping doing a few "chores", crafts, projects, getting a bath or shower in, and playing some by himself. When Dad gets home, they play for about 45 minutes before dinner at 5:45, then after dinner we all help clear the table & then we have some quiet time (books, puzzle, board game) before bedtime routine starts around 7:10. The weekends are usually doing stuff around the house while he plays by himself and helps with some of it, then we do the library, errands, pool, park, have a friend over, etc.... He really doesn't have time to be lonely or bored. We have a pretty simple, but full life. Lots of love and he is happy!
Sammi - posted on 07/25/2012
I know your feeling we adopted my daughter as a newborn and she is 9 and she seems lonely sometimes too and I feel really guilty but we just can't afford to adopt another baby it is so expensive. We just try to keep her involved in alot of school activities for the interaction and she has friends over alot. My self I wish I could adopt one tommorrow but its not going to happen.
Ana - posted on 07/25/2012
Hi! I have a 4.5yr old, and I'm experiencing those same feelings. Plus she keeps wishing & asking for a sibling. Don't know if I should have another.
Bethany - posted on 07/07/2012
When my son turned 3, I battled with the decision to have another child for awhile. I weighed the pros and cons of having just one child or several and decided that it was pretty even. My son is now 5 and it is nice not to have to share my attention with other children. He has a lot of cousins and friends at school and in his Taekwondo class. I do not have to worry about him being lonely. I have also taught him to treat others nicely and with respect so he makes friends wherever he goes (at the park, at the pool, in the museum, etc.) . My husband and I are both from big families (I am 1 of 6 and he is 1 of 4) and we didn't get to do the things we wanted to do. I am glad we have the money to allow my son to do whatever he wants and we will be able to help support his dreams! I also like not having to worry about being fair between siblings and dividing my attention. He is at the age where we can go places and do things too without having a baby to worry about.It's also nice to think that once my son is of the age where he can go hang out with his friends, my husband and I will get time to ourselves again :) Don't get me wrong, I am extremely close to my 5 siblings, but it was a crazy lifestyle and I hated watching my parents struggle even though we were happy. My husband is quite the opposite and doesn't speak to any of his siblings, so having siblings doesn't guarantee they will have eachother later in life. I hope this helps!
Rachael - posted on 07/02/2012
I think the key is to aknowledge you are having that feeling and then move on from it because if you aren't going to change the situation then you need to be able to deal with the things that come up because of having one child. I do feel guilty at times, it does come up peroidically but I have learnt that it is a waste of energy and the worst thing is if you little one picks up on it when they might ordinarily be happy and not at all concerned with the things that are making you feel guilty. If you are happy then that is the best thing you can give your girl. I have a 7yo boy and he is a very happy well socialised child, his manners are often commented on (in a good way) and he has been noted in his school reports as being considerate and compassionate. The old sterotypes don't apply in most cases I have found. Single child families are the fastest growing family type and as these children grow up they will meet lots of other children who also have no siblings. Enjoy your little girl, embrace the decision you have made. x.
Louise - posted on 06/28/2012
I know what you mean although I have three kids. My first two were 2.5 years apart and they grew up together and had each other for company. My daughter is now 3.5 and my sons are 21 and 18 and left home. My daughter needs so much more of my attention and she is very lonely at times, although she gets far more than the boys ever had. I do feel rotten for not having any more as she would of made a great big sister. It also worries me at times, if something happend to me what would happen to her. The boys had each other, she has nobody! All things that should of passed my mind before having her, but didn't.
She does not know what it is like to have a brother or sister of a similar age so knows no different but I do and sometimes that hurts!