does anyone ever wish they had more children?

Ruth - posted on 04/07/2013

absolutely no no no no way

Rachael - posted on 11/03/2012

I think I am starting to wish I had another child, even considering perhaps trying again at 41 even though my son is 8 and I have always been a definite supporter of having just one child. I just feel perhaps I have been selfish and did not give enough thought to the whole idea of another child in the bigger picture, I just always went with how I was feeling at the time, as in I never really felt the pull towards another child. It may be that I sense my sons sometimes lonliness, it may be that I want to grab that last chance if it is available to me. We have never used any contraception but withdrawal and I have always believed if it was meant to be it would happen. It never has though. I just wonder if I should have been a bit more concious about trying.

Janelle - posted on 11/01/2012

I totally want another boy. Had a boy then twin girls. Love them all. My first pregnancy was a miss carriage then my 4th was also a miss carriage. I am so grateful for my three. Really it's enough. Good luck. God loves babies.

Rachael - posted on 10/26/2012

Hi Yvonne, I wonder, how do you respond when your son says he wants a brother or sister and how old is he? My son bought it up for the first time tonight, and I was touched by his honesty and also his awareness that he realised it probably wasn't going to happen. He is 8. We discussed it on a fairly mature level and he is okay with it, I think he just wishes he had someone to share things with, like when he is mad at me or there is a big thing going on ( we got some home improvements lately and I think he really wants to share with someone who is not me or his Dad).

I have never tried to not have another baby but have never conciously tried either, ie: we just use withdrawal for contraception. I just had the attitude that if it was meant to happen, then fate would lend a hand.

Gillian - posted on 10/25/2012

I actually Googled: "I wish I had one more child" because I was feeling sad about it today, and found this article. I have a beautiful boy who is almost 5, and just started Kindergarten, where he is doing really well. My husband and I got married 6 years ago after knowing each other for only about a year and a half (crazy?) and I became pregnant 6 months later. My husband and I were both older--in our late 30's-- and I believe we jumped into being married, and following through with the pregnancy because in our hearts, before we met, we had both started giving up hope that either was in the cards. However, our relationship had a rather rocky start. Getting pregnant so soon after getting married put a lot of pressure on our marriage, though, we both wanted to go through with it. However, my son's first year of life was difficult for me. My son was very colicky for many months on end he kept us up for hours and hours day in and day out with constant screaming. I didn't feel supported by my husband for several years, and in hindsight I see that he was suffering from depression, but my resentment kept us from having a good relationship which deeply affected my desire to do the things you need to do to have another baby! While we are in a great place now with each other and our family, and I'm very grateful for my little boy, I still can't help but be sad at times that things weren't different. I'm getting to old to have another-- 42 is pushing it I'd say. Also, in reality, I'm not sure I could have handled two in diapers, with a husband that worked away from home for almost a year. Sometimes you've got to make tough calls in life, and I guess I'm just going to try and be grateful for all that I do have.

Danielle - posted on 09/23/2009

I have a son who will be 6 in November and would love another child. However I worry about the whole money thing and not to mention my age I'm 37 and soon to be 38 and have issues with will I have a healthy pregnancy and give birth to a healthy baby. In March we were almost three months pregnant and I had a miscarriage and I got to tell you I didn't have the baby blues with my son but I sure did loose touch with reality with my miscarriage. I just don't know if I could put myself through that and the doctor didn't really help much by saying well dear your eggs are old. Have you seen the people in their 40's and 50's getting pregnant. I really think it's a decision that is best made between you and your husband. Only you know what's good for you. I do however, worry about my son growning up alone if something would happen to either one of us so what we are in the middle of doing now is making up a list of the pro's and con's of another child. Good luck to you all. Danielle

Hansy - posted on 09/21/2009

I have decided to stay with one child but sometimes I wonder if I am not being selfish. I have many friends but none of them could replace the bond I have with my siblings. Me and my sister share everything, even now that we are living thousand of miles away from each other. I want my son to experience that. If I decide to have another child will be through adoption, not because I can't have children but because I think that there are already many children in this world who need a loving family. Now if I just could convince my husband....

Florence - posted on 09/21/2009

Yes, all the time! My poor baby is 4 and wants a sister SO bad she can't stand it! Fortunately we don't have a problem conceiving but with both of working full time, we just don't know how we'd do it. I think things would be different if I were a stay at home mom but unfortunately we both HAVE to work! Maybe one day, though! I never say never.

Bitty - posted on 09/21/2009

no.....its nt like dat i have 5 yr old son n i love him 2much wana give my best to him.....he is demanding needs me so i dnt feel d need.....but if u wana have u must get d treatment done

Cyndi - posted on 09/20/2009

I was pregnant when my son was 3, but had a miscarriage. We did some minor fertility treatment but gave up when the fertility treatments became more involved.
We considered adoption, but that didn't work out for our family.
I still wish my son (now 10) had a sibling, but I know that will not happen. At the same time, I am thankful for my happy, healthy son!

Michele - posted on 09/19/2009

Thank-you Thank-you Ladies!! I am so happy to have found this group of mothers with only children. we have a 6 year old boy. He is wonderful in every way, but I desperately want another child, I am almost 44 and not able to have any more kids, we have been trying to adopt for 3 years, looked into foster care, then my husband got laid off and we moved, we have hit some financial troubles and it just looks like for now he will be our only child, not for lack of trying though. I am not giving up though, still would like to adopt or do foster care. What i hope for now is to be the best Mom and do my best for our family and not live with regrets. It makes me feel good to read similar stories and know I am not alone. And I think how grateful I am to have one child, some people choose to have one child and that child grows up just fine, some people are never able to have children......

Julia - posted on 09/18/2009

Yes, my son is 8. I am still young, so I have time, but my husband has no interest in another child. I've been ready for about 3 years now. At this point, if I ever have another one, it will be like 2 only children since they will be so far apart in age.

Susan - posted on 09/17/2009

HI There my son is 5. I would give my right arm for another child or two... I have tried numerous things to no avail.

Dawn - posted on 09/16/2009

I have a little girl, I lost my first child when i was only 4 months pregnant. My daughter was due 2 yrs to the day that I lost my first. I was afraid that something was wrong with me that i wouldn't be able to have a health baby. So after a very long 9 months and 4 days my daughter was born and she was health, except she got jaundice for about a week. I was so happy that she was health and okay that I didn't want anymore, then and I don't to this day. I was blessed with her and I don't want to push that button. If thing would have been different and that I wouldn't have left her father shortly after her birth, I might have changed my mind. I don't like that she is an only child in this big big world. I never thought about her being an only child and how that would be for her when she gets older. I can't change the past, I can only make the future brighter for her. As long as I have friends that are close, she will always have someone that is there for her if she ever needs them.

Michelle - posted on 09/15/2009

I would LOVE to have another baby. I have problems getting and staying pregnant, plus I am 42 which makes it more difficult to try for another one. It was shocking when I got pregnant with her and STAYED pregnant with her. Every time since, it has been a miscarriage. I am still hoping and praying that I can have another one someday.
My daughter has AHDH/ODD/EBD and sometimes I am glad I only have one to deal with, but I would gladly have another in a heartbeat, God willing!

Crystal - posted on 09/14/2009

I would love another child. however my daughter has complex medical problems and i dont know if it would be a good idea. not only that ima single parent by choice. I just love babies!

Breda - posted on 09/14/2009

I have one child, a nine year old. I think we have left it too late now to try for another baby because the age gap will be too big. In saying that, my husband would love another, but as long as i'm the one giving birth, it ain't gonna happen!!!!

Yvonne - posted on 09/14/2009

I definately wish i had more children, my son reminds me all the time that he wishes he had a brother or sister.

Angela - posted on 09/13/2009

tried for 2 years for my first. I I have a daugher age 7. Tried so hard with fertility treatments and the works for over 5 years. I gave up ONLY due to the financial costs of the treatments. I try to never give up hope that someday there will be another one in our lives. I read all the others comments about how they had one and the other one came as a suprise. I am still waiting. Good luck and may God bless u!

Cheryl - posted on 09/12/2009

Michelle, my daughter told me one time that she was sad that she didn't have any siblings. After visiting friends w/older or younger siblings, she was glad to be an only. She realized how good she had it..lol

Debbie - posted on 09/12/2009

Hi I am new to circle of moms. I wish their was more children for us, i almost died having my son. My body now will not allow a second pregnancy to happy. I still grieve about it, but it not as big of a deal as it was when ds was younger. He is 9 with special needs. Maybe he is all we were supposed to have so our full attention is on him and his needs.

Rachel - posted on 09/09/2009

my son is 16 months old, and I often think I'd like another baby. as far as i know, there are no only-children in my family, same with my boyfriend. when my son was first born, my bf told me one day he outta have a sibling...but yesterday when we discussed it he said he was happy with one. I hate bringing money matters into this topic, but we have a tight budget and are living comfortably with one child right now. Part of me feels guilty giving away his outgrown clothes: "what if I have another baby", same with giving away toys and baby furniture...I have stored most of it due to the guilt and longing for the day our second child can use all that stuff. But I am looking far ahead. I wouldnt want another baby till my son is at least in school, but since I kinda want to go back to work by that time (i'm a sahm), if i have another baby, I'll stay at home once again. So I'm kinda confused about my decision. =(

Brenda - posted on 09/09/2009

I would love to have another child (we have a six year old daughter)..not sure if it will ever happen, but it would be nice...our daughter mentions having a baby sister.

Dee - posted on 09/09/2009

It took us 8 yrs of trying with fertility drugs and shots. I finally got pregnant and miscarried. About 5 months later I got pregnant again and I carried her almost to term. She was born 1 month early. Our girl is now 12 yrs old. We tried and tried to have another child. My husband has a blood disorder and the meds that the drs put him on were causing me to have miscarriage after miscarriage. I stopped counting at 6. We finally just stopped trying. I had to have a hysterectomy a couple years ago so I guess we are done and I'm getting up there in age. But I tell you that when our daughter has her room full of pre-teens over and they are all screaming and talking at once I'm actually really glad we only have the one!!!

Cheryl - posted on 09/09/2009

I divorced when my daughter was 2 yrs old and did not marry until she was 8yrs old. My husband had 3 children from previous marriage and had a vasectomy.. I am now glad I only had my daughter, especially after surviving the wonderful "teen years".. Our daughter is now 21 yrs old, going to college and a very loving, beautiful young woman. Husband has been a wonderful dad to her and I could not have done it w/out him.. I have also come to the conclusion that the number of children you have does not make a family - it's how you raise and interact with your children, be it 1 or 19!!

I would rather have 1 smart, polite child than 3 or more obnoxious children..

(Of course, I admire the Duggar family because they have a lovely, large family. Very patient parents. )

Cindy - posted on 09/04/2009

I didn't reply to the conceiving part - I had a miscarriage and a tubal pregnancy and had to take fertility drugs to conceive. I also had a rough pregnancy with insulin defendant gestational diabetes. When our son was born he was also very sick which is all part of the decision to not have another child - I kind of feel like he is a blessing and we should just accept him as being the only one.

Cindy - posted on 09/04/2009

I have an 8 year old boy. I have thought about it but I definitely talk myself out of it every time. I was an only child and always wanted my son to have a sibling, like I didn't have. What changes my mind every time, and this isn't meant to be a bad thing, is that I had no idea how much work it is. He is in taekwondo and cub scouts and we are running around all the time. My husband and I both have 8-5 jobs and are exhausted. I just can't imagine adding another one to the mix. I also find it difficult to think about sharing my time with another child. My son is so connected to both of us - I think he would be very resentful about that.

Robin - posted on 09/04/2009

I have a 2 year old beautiful little boy that I love more then anything!!!! We had tried for 5 years, had 2 miscarriages and thought it would be just the 2 of us. He was a surprise!!!! He's a blessing that we are thankful for everyday. However, yes I do think of having another. My husband really wants another child. I'm 44, I worry that something could be wrong with the baby and that I'm just being selfish. But he's growing up sooooo fast! I'm 1 of 5 kids, I'd love for my little guy to have a sibling.

Jessica - posted on 09/03/2009

I have a two year old daughter, I'm 23 and I really want another child. Hopefully before I'm 25 but my fiance wants us to wait until our daughter is 5 and in school. Plus we want to make sure I'm done with school and we have somewhere to live and room for another one. So I'm going to have another but not right now.

Amanda - posted on 09/02/2009

thank you for saying that. I am having an awful morning and that made me feel hopeful. God bless you.

Amanda - posted on 09/02/2009

Well hopefully you knight in shinning armour comes soon :)

Amanda - posted on 09/01/2009

yes - sometimes I feel bad because my son asks me when I am going to have a little brother or sister for him. Another baby would be nice but I just can't do it again without being married. So I pray for a husband so he is not alone.

Amanda - posted on 09/01/2009

I have a 5 year old daughter, I was 38 when I had her and she was a complete miracle, as I was told I wouldn't have children, unless I had IVF, so I am just so grateful to have her, but if I were younger I would definetly have liked to have two, as I think an only child will be lonely :(

Suzy - posted on 09/01/2009

My son is ten years old and would love to have a sibling; he still mentions it and it breaks my heart. As Pie mentioned early on in the responses, I am now 43 also and realize that it's not in the cards at this point. I should feel blessed to have the healthy son I have! I grew up with a brother and would love for our son to have the relationship and shared experiences my brother and I have; I often feel guilty that he is missing out on both the joys, disappointments and life lessons of having a brother or sister. But...it is what it is and our choice is to make the best of it. If I'd had a choice, he would have a sibling.

Nicole A. - posted on 08/30/2009

I'm an only child and at 38, I teeter back and forth about not having siblings. I see the slight upside of not having to share room, clothes and other things but now, when I need the comfort of a sibling- I don't have that nor will ever have that bond. When my son was younger, he talked of having siblings and he still loves children. He's a gentle giant. I teeter with the financial side and living space really, emotionally and physically, I believe I can have at it again.

Shanine - posted on 08/30/2009

My daughter is 7 yrs old, and it took my husband and I 4 yrs to have her. It was so hard dealing with the disappointment of not being able to conceive, that I find myself lucky to have been able to have a child at all. I don't want to go through that again, I consider myself extremely lucky to have my daughter....and am very happy with just her.

Sam - posted on 08/26/2009

I also have PCOS and was told I'd never be able to have children. When I gave up trying I fell pregnant with my miracle baby. The pregnancy was great, the delivery was a nightmare... one that I didn't think either of us would survive. My husband and I both decided we would not have anymore after that. We feel lucky to have the one child we have. She is 11 years old now and over the years she has always asked why she's an only child and can she have a brother or sister....one day I'll fill her in on the details, and pray she doesn't have to go through the same.

STEPHANIE - posted on 08/25/2009

I think about it the most when I see him playing alone in the park. I want him to have that connection with a brother or sister. I'm just hesitant because I want to make sure I can handle another baby, especially since my husband is military, so there is a big chance I will be alone for the most part.

Yvette - posted on 08/25/2009

Hi Laura,

I am a 43 yr old mother of a 9 year old boy. I had no problem getting pregnant. I had problems maintaining pregnancies as I started to try to have children. I had multiple micarriages and even had 1 stillbirth. My heart was breaking everytime I lost a baby. I even began to be fearful and thought I would never have a live birth. I felt on edge the entire time I was pregnant with my son. I finally have an emergency c-section after little movement during an ultrasound. He was born not breathing and had to be resuscitated. The next 96 hours were crucial. But he made through. 5 weeks later he came home.

I felt so happy and blessed to finally be a mother!!

I started to long for more children and even became pregnant again and lost that baby at 12 weeks. I would feel depressed and unfullfilled. I just need to keep reminding myself that my son was a miracle from God to me. I don't know why, but that is just the way it is. I now feel blessed and thank God everyday for giving me the opportunity to be a mom. My son is the greatest gift . For me, it too painful after so much heartbreak of losses and I had to give up for my own sanity.

Emma - posted on 08/19/2009

Yes - my daughter is now 11 - its just never happened.

Gloria - posted on 08/19/2009

I have a 7 year-old and he has been begging me for a bro/sis I was pregnant but my girl passed away at 6 months of gestation so now I'm so afraid to try again. I do want another one but I want to wait for my body and mind to re-adjust because I couldn't stand going through the same thing. All I have to say is if I wasn't able to have another one I still be so happy with my boy, he fulfills me in every way.

Lora - posted on 08/19/2009

Not really. The only way I would have another is if I did not have to be pregnant or pay...like an orphan being abandoned on my doorstep with a trust fund. I am really content with just one. What I do wish is I could go back now and then to when he was a sweet little baby and visit...but him as a baby...not a new baby. But I have other babies in my family and that helps.

Crystal - posted on 08/14/2009

Yes, I wanted more than one child. Our son is 12 years old now. He still asked for a little brother, but my husband and I were young when we had him, at 21. We obviously didn't have problems conceiving, my pregnancy was perfect, but my delivery was very high risk. I had an emergency c-section because the baby was stuck in the birth canal, he wasn't getting enough oxygen. My blood pressure was rising and my uterus tore like a T. Luckily, the doctors acted quickly and were able to get him out in time to give oxygen and he has no problems or damage....hes a perfectly healthy, athletics, smart kid. We got very lucky because the truth is we both could have died that day. I too believe God has blessed us with one special little boy, he's like an angel. We've been married for nearly 14 years and our son has always been the center of our lives. I know one day our son will probably have more than one child, maybe many because he is an only child and me and my husband will then get the joy of being awesome grandparents!

Lucy - posted on 08/14/2009

Yes and sometimes No. I had my daughter really early in my marriage. Then decided to use contraceptives for two years b/c I was afraid to become pregnant too quickly. Then when decided to have more children b/c my daughter was lonely and kept asking, have had 3 miscarriages and trouble conceiving for 6 years now.. For the last 10 months I have been the foster mom of my great niece and nephew and I was really eager at first he is 1 1/12 she's 4, but even though I love the fact that I'm helping them and love them dearly and my daughter has the company she wanted, right? not quite they fight constantly and are too active for me to keep up with and many times I miss just me and my daughter time since she's 8, she's more independent. I have many mixed feelings, sometimes I wish to have a little boy and my daughter tell me "I want my own sibling b/c I will be lonely when they leave with their mom." Many times I feel like giving up but my daughter and husband have much faith, and looking at their little faces give me hope.

Gina - posted on 08/13/2009

When I was small I wished I had 12 kids know that Im older only had one and he is 14yrs. Only God knows why I only had one? But Im trying....

Courtney - posted on 08/02/2009

Yes, I would love to have another at some point. Two things are holding us back at this point. 1. My husband and I are carriers for a genetic skin disorder called Netherton Syndrome, which our daughter has. It was a complete surprise, because it is a recessive gene, we had no idea we were carriers. So, any biological children we have have a 25% of having the disorder - I wouldn't want another child of mine to suffer through what our daughter did when she was younger. 2. I'm going to be applying to PhD programs for a 2011 start, after our current child starts kindergarten, and I'm not sure I'd be able to handle an infant + grad. school + school aged child. So, it might be another 5 or 6 years before we even think about it, and then it'll probably be something costly like IVF or adoption to get another child.

Gretchen - posted on 08/02/2009

I would love to have another child. My only child just turned 2 years old, but I am raising him alone. I do not want to go through that again. I did not want to raise him by myself. As I get older, I wonder if I will ever have another one. I am beginning to accept the fact that it may just be me and him.

Karen - posted on 08/01/2009

my story is unique, we have an 11 yr old daughter, i am an only child and my husband is not in contact with his family for good reasons. my mother who i was extrememly close too died when our daughter was 7 weeks old. my dad died when i was 13. although i mourned for a few years and at times still do, another child was never a thought of mine, because i was depressed. then recently i have been regreting not having or consciencly trying, however i am now 43. we never tried for or prevented another pregnancy, so i truely believe our child was a gift from God who graciously waited for me to have my own family before he took my parent away from me.

Michelle - posted on 07/29/2009

me too! i am badly wishing for at least one or two more child. I have a 6yo and i got her when i was 21, it was an unexpected pregnancy. when my daughter got 4, my husband and i tried to have another one, but we are really had a hard time to conceive.
maybe it is not yet our time... so i leave it all to god.

Meredith - posted on 07/28/2009

I would like for my son to have a sibling but at my age I have enough trouble keeping up with my 7 year old. It's hard to balance work, marriage, parenting and time for myself. I try to keep my son busy with social activities. So far he seems well adjusted. I have a step-daughter but she is 10 years older and lives with her bio Mother.