Guilt

Cindy - posted on 02/07/2009

I have times when I worry about my child's life as an adult not having a sibling to connect with or get together with at Holidays. But my husband is an only child and he actually doesn't worry about it and is often times he doesn't have a sibling especially when he has seen me go through conflicts with one of my siblings

Joyce - posted on 02/06/2009

Whether you have one kid or 5, you still will have to work and have to do your own stuff, so don't feel guilty. I agree with Neisha too, there is never a guarantee that siblings will get along and if you really think of it siblings rarely get along as children, at least what I've seen. All they ever do is fight with eachother! I wanted to spare our son the pain of having a sibling who in the end really doesn't like him, I don't want to listen to kids fight everyday, I'm happy with just our one little dude.

Sheri - posted on 02/06/2009

Having an only child means going out of your way to make sure there are playdates maybe weekly or every other wk. Don't feel guilty ! I think of how much less my son would get if I had more than 1. He get's everything he want's w/o the spoiled part. I always wanted 2....but when I should have had the 2nd, the time wasn't right. how old are you? How old is your child ? boy/girl ?

Beverly - posted on 02/05/2009

No. My daughter is in daycare and we schedule playdates all the time. It's not hard to get interaction with other children, you just have to look. Another good idea is "Mother's Day Out" which is an inexpensive way for SAHM to get a short break by leaving their child to be cared for at church. I know around here it's $20 per day, which is significantly less expensive than daycare.

Neisha - posted on 02/01/2009

Your not alone... I can relate. I very often feel that way and I am about to be putting in more hours. I most often have the month schedule out the month for us. NO Worries still trying to perfect it. I have to calendars up. My inspirational appt calendar and the school calendar. Pre plan out outings.... Some wit just you and the baby, Some wit just daddy and baby and some with the entire fam. This way the both of you begin to develop a strong relationship with your baby as well as all together as a unit. I promise you it will help with your feelings. Even if you plan it 2-3 weeks ahead it will be something to look forward to. But never tell the babies... always wait til that day and maybe even make it a surprise....that way just it case it doesn't happen for what ever reason your little one isn't disappointed. It's loads of things to do

Kim - posted on 01/31/2009

Thank you for that advice and I will try it. Sounds definitely doable and makes sense. I feel guilty I guess bc I work alot and when I finally get home, I'm too pooped to play. Her dad is around and is wonderful which turns into extra guilt bc he fills my void. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Neisha - posted on 01/31/2009

Ummm... I used to have that problem. I don't know if I could call it guilt but I did feel bad. I needed for my baby to get that desire out of her so that she doesn't attract the wrong friends being a needy person. Also having another child doesn't always been that the kids will be close so that helped with me feeling bad. For starters... we would pray together and I we ask God together to fill up any void that she think she may have. Even at the age of 2 I would make her say over and over..."All I need is God, Mommy and Myself." And when it was times to go on outings when friends would ask to come along with their kids I began to turn them down... so that Honestly we both can get used to and be okay with the fact it is just me and her. We go alot of places just me and her. This is advice I got from mothers of only children that kids are grown. We have been to Sesame place just me and her, we got to restaurants just me and her. I had to get used to it to. It's to the point now we like to be alone together. It ended being good for the both of us.