help

Kelly - posted on 02/03/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My son is an only child, kind of !

My son is an only child in my house but from his dad he has 3 sisters and a little brother. His father was around for only one full year out of 9 years now, it was between the ages 5-6 years old he spent time with the sisters and brother got to know them and love them, and than his father just stop coming stoped calling for like to years,than calls up out of no where to tell my son the grandfather my son dont even know, has pasted. I dont know how to deal with my son when he misses his brother and sisters.Every christmas my son wants to get his little brother something,

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Hello, My daughter is an only child(sort of ) as well. Her birth father (BF) has two more children, a 4yr old half sister & 5 month old half brother to my daughter.
Even though my X husband left when my daughter was 3 months old, I have always tried to maintain contact between him & my daughter...not for his sake, but for hers. My child is 8yrs, turning 9 this April...I email her BF several times throughout the year giving updates on schooling, life in general etc...he never replies. He lives in New Zealand & we now live in Australia. Over the Xmas period my daughter & I went home to NZ to visit family, I made sure she took back gifts for both her siblings. In my calendar I have the birth dates of both children & am diligent to allow my daughter to post cards & gifts over for special occassions. I don't particularly get on with my X or his new partner, but I always encourage a relationship between my daughter & her birth father...& my daughter & her half siblings. She speaks often of her little sister & half brother... I think it's great that she has such a caring heart. It would be great if your son could have contact with his siblings as well, maybe he could send photos,cards etc to them...I don't know your situation. Also like Denise mentioned, you can bypass the dad if the situation is tricky & at least exchange postal addresses, possibly phones numbers so your son can contact his siblings. All the best, Chey

Sam - posted on 02/05/2009

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why dont u let ur son get his little brother something and send it to him... it will be between them and not the father, atleast then u and ur son would have tried and when the brother is older he will no that his big brother cares. maybe even help him write a few letters? maybe the mother of the other children and urself can arrange a meeting every so often? x

Denise - posted on 02/04/2009

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My 8yr old son is also 'kind of' and only child, having 3 older brothers from his Dad's previous 2 marriages. What I have done is establish friendships with the other Moms and bypass Dad so that my son can keep in touch with his brothers. Just an idea. Good luck.

Melissa - posted on 02/03/2009

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Thats a very difficult situation.  He sounds old enough to understand that sometimes people don't have there priorities strait.  This doesn't mean Daddy doesn't love him.  I guess you could call his dad and let him explain his absence.  Depending on how he acts when he explains stuff.  If he has a good stepdad you might explain that while sometimes one daddy makes a baby a different daddy raises it because he loves it.  I'm sorry you little one has to deal with such a bad situation,

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