How can I get my child to do his homework?

Michelle - posted on 12/10/2009 ( 19 moms have responded )

3

11

0

I have a 5th grader who is 10 years old that hates doing his homework. What can I do to get him motivated possibly enjoy doing homework? It is such a choir and wearing me down! Ugh!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Melanie - posted on 01/12/2010

154

7

8

My daughter has just turned eight and yes you guessed it homework is an issue. Homework is up on her list of things to do in the afternoon (as is getting out of her uniform, emptying her school bag). Her reward for doing her homework is able to watch tv or play the playstation or DS, her choice.



The other thing I/we have done is to talk to her about doing things we don't like. Acknowledge that homework can be all those things they whine about (boring, hard etc), but someties you have to do things you don't like. Give an example - I don't like ....... but I have to do it because if I didn't........ Be honest (or at least as honest as you can). A good one always is I don't like having to make you do your homework but I have to do it because it is part of being a parent. Let him know it is okay not to enjoy doing homework but it is necessary and therefore it is much easier and quicker to just do it than to spend the time whining and having mum riding him to make sure it is done.

Amber - posted on 01/04/2010

49

1

3

I found with my daughter that the best way to do it was to keep her in the school mindset. Before i go to pick her up, I set up a snack and all of her homework essentials (pencils, crayons, ect) at the table where she always does her homework.

They have uniforms at her school, so I have her stay in her uniform and immediately sit down to start her homework. This way she's still in the school mindset, you know?

Also, I'll sit with her and do my bills, read a book, or figure out our meals for the week so that it seems as if this is a work time for everyone. If there's a TV on in the house, that kid is going to think, "Hey, I want to watch TV, not do this lame homework" and that's a huge distraction. Besides, if there is an issue and she needs help, I'll be right there. I find the second she has to get up for anything, I've lost the war. She'll get distracted and the fight is on!

And finally, we try to do the stuff together. If she needs to read a story, I have her read it to me, or we'll eat take a character and read their lines like a play. If it's math, I'll have her do the paper and then I'll check it, like a teacher would, and give her a sticker if she gets them all right the first time. And if it's science, we really have fun! I find out what she's studying and I'll go online to find a movie that talks about it. We watch it together and talk about the new things we learned. I find that it makes what she's learning more relevant.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

19 Comments

View replies by

Shelly - posted on 01/12/2010

12

30

0

Give positive verbal reinforcements. As a reward give time to play games, treats.etc it works for me and he is actively involved in getting work done. Try also removing activities such as televison, or DS or PSP time. I also remind him that he will have the ability to enjoy the activities once the most important task is completed.

Jennifer - posted on 01/12/2010

9

8

0

I have been through this. My daughter would argue with me and I would argue back. The thing is, you have to be firm and consistent. You set them down at the table at a specific time and make sure it gets done. They are expected to do it and the only rewards must be verbal. I used to bribe my daughter but no more. Do not allow the child to argue, this is what they want, attention and a way to stall. Do not engage in this behavior.
My friend advised me on this and it worked. My daughter is 8 but is gifted and was moved to fourth grade so, I think it is very common in this age group.
I watch while she does her homework but do not allow her to argue or get off the subject. Set aside a time frame and phrase him when he gets correct answers or works well during homework time. You set the rules!!! This is their responsibity!!!

Maria - posted on 01/09/2010

1

1

0

the best way is to limit what his fun time is. i have a 7th grader and since she started school the rules were as follows: no computer (unless its homework related), no xbox, play station, game boy etc... Sun- Thurs period. 30 minuets of tv time after home work is done. 30 minuets of reading before bed(which we do together). if you keep it structured he'll eventually fall into line. my daughter is an outside kid so she didn't mind the things i took away but if the rules were broken then the outside as well is taken away and that motivates her to work harder. Most kids i notice don't like losing out on their play time so if you stick to your guns ( and believe me it's hard at first) he should be fine. you can also sit and do it with him that helped too. it does take tough love sometimes. my daughter is now a straight A student.

Tammy - posted on 01/04/2010

11

3

5

My method was simple and effective. I simply asked her if she liked the feeling of seeing a good grade on her schoolwork and her tests. I told her she could have that feeling all of the time if she did her homework and studied for tests. It was not easy, but then it never is. But, that is the way I handled it. If she got all A's on her report card she got 50 dollars from my dad and 5 dollars for each A from my brother. Then she could spend it any way she wanted no questions or limits. It really worked for her, but each child is different and you have to find your way to what works for that child.

Catherine - posted on 12/28/2009

4

1

0

I have been told that boys are much easier to raise than girls, but not always so with the attention level for homework. I am not a fan of the reward system: homework is part of their life, just like brushing teeth and getting dressed. My only child has just started college this fall. I found that the thing that works the absolute best was to sit at the same table with her while she worked. Being a single mom, I would do some of my "work" first: pay bills, figure grocery list etc, then I would get my reward: read, knit etc. That way you are handy for questions, are there just for basic support and teach by example of doing the necessary task then have my own reward.

Stephanie - posted on 12/28/2009

4

13

1

I have to agree with these moms. I had a hard time getting my son to settle down in class and do homework when he got home.. I tried everything I could, I have a stubborn son taking things like tv away didn't work. What worked for him was when he got his own pony and was told only way he could go to the barn and work with it and ride it was he had to do good in school and do his homework so that he would have time to go work with the pony. I am still having some problems, now that it is to cold to go to the barn but to make spelling exciting for him I spell things out when talking to my mom and he will tell us hey I know that one and also I let him have game time on the computer but only if he can get his homework done in timely manner. FB has helped my child with reading because he likes the games on it and has to read it in order to play them so his grades have gotten better in these subjects.

Carol - posted on 12/28/2009

4

5

1

Take stuff away that he/she loves if it doesn't get done. For example, no TV, no games, no going outdoors, etc

Carol - posted on 12/28/2009

13

25

0

I agree with Becky!
my is 4th grade and school indicate that they carefully design the daily home work for each grade level and for 4th graders, shouldn't be taking child(ren) more than 1 hour of his/her time. if child takes longer than an hour, talk to the teacher and all together should find out what's the key problem.
soon as our son reached school age, we taught him to accept he has his own job which is to be a good child and student. home work is part of his job description.
good luck.

Amy - posted on 12/21/2009

21

11

1

I let my daughter take breaks, she gets to let her brain take a rest. If the homework is hard I try to help in some way. And don't underestimate the value of letting your children teach you! Children recall much more when they do the teaching. As far as my daughter knows she always does her homework at her desk in her room, but sometimes when it's hard or there's a lot I "let" her do it at the kitchen table. Then I keep an eye on her and I'm available to help. She sees it as a reward and gets done much faster.

Rose - posted on 12/19/2009

31

4

3

I had this problem with mine too. I got him into a routine whereby he came in from school, had a snack, changed out of his uniform, I'd make a cup of tea and grab a magazine or a book, we sat at the table, discussed what needed to be done and how long it should take for him to do it. Then I'd sit with him, drink my tea, read my book, write a letter, whatever, and every now and again I'd ask him how he was getting on. If he went over the time due to his wasting it then there was no tv, games etc. after dinner. No arguments, no telling off, just pack up the books at a certain time, and a note for the teacher saying that his work wasn't done. (I was in cahoots with the teacher on that!) After a few detentions at school when he realised we meant business he got into the way of it and although he still hates it now he does it without attempting to argue! Good luck.

Josephine - posted on 12/14/2009

12

10

3

10 years old? Negotiating time. Mine is 7 and I share your woes. It's worse over here in Spore. Tons of homeworks. Some call it bribery but I call it incentive. Work for a win win situation but make him understand . He gets good grades , he gets the goodie but clear terms and conditions set. Deal is off if he aint working on it.

Amrita - posted on 12/12/2009

2

7

0

I guess this problem is suffered by many....just develop his interest with rewards...u can make himunderstand of 24hrs he as to give u only 1 hr for this job n rest his time...hope it helps

Kerri - posted on 12/12/2009

2

36

0

My son had trouble with math. I use to act like I didn't understand what he was doing and had him teach me. Made him think he was smarter than Mom. =]

[deleted account]

I teach school and I hear this complaint every year so you are not alone! Is the work too hard? That could be part of the problem. Make sure he understands the work and is able to do it. If not talk with his teacher about it.

You can also do like the others say and try making it fun. Keep a sticker chart for each night homework done and give small rewards for doing homework. Make sure you have a routine that you do each night and stick to it. Consistency is key. :D

Veronica - posted on 12/10/2009

6

20

1

make it a game that's how i got mys to do her's and sing a song so they can learn how to spell the words

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms