Molly - posted on 03/28/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )




My daughter is 5 1/2 yrs old in kindergarten. She is extremely bright and social. My only problem is that when she is doing/has done somethiong potentially dangerous and I try to explain to her why, she goes into hysterics. Like, mortal danger hysterics. Shrieking, crying, plugging her ears, screaming "dont tell me anything scary!" For example, just the other day, she stuck a jingle bell up her nose. We managed to retrieve it, and the event istelf made her cry, especially when she discovered her nose was bleeding. When I tried explaining to her it was dangerous and if we hadn't gotten it out she would have had to seen the dr., she FREAKED out. Keep in mind it was 9pm and she was screaming like her life depended on it! We couldnt calm her down. Are these kind of responses over such minor things normal? On one hand it bothers me to see/hear the pure terror in her. On the other hand, I worry that the whole neighborhood can hear it and, god forbid, think something is terribly wrong. So, how do I explain consequences to her without this horrible reaction? How do the rest of you with 'passionate' children deal with these situations?


Louise - posted on 03/28/2011




It is a learnt responce to act like this which becomes a habbit. To get on top of this when she starts to scream and shout tell her to go and calm down and place her in her room and tell her that you will talk to her when she is calmer. Let her throw a wobbly away from the family and when she stops go into her room and get down to her level and discuss why she is crying like that. Tell her mummy does not like it when she does that and you are going to put you in your room to calm down every time you do it. Tell her she is a big girl now and that big girls talk things through and don't act like a baby.

If you make it clear to her that you are not going to react to this behaviour she will stop. I know it is motherly to want to calm your child but she is reacting to the attention. I expect that you cuddle her and try and soothe her when she does this, so this bad behaviour is being rewarded so she will keep doing it.

Turn the tables on her and try what I have suggested after a couple of times of being removed from the situation she will stop and learn how to deal with her emotions.

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