Fighting the School District

Melody - posted on 08/20/2010

congratulations on getting your son into the right school.

Allyssa - posted on 08/20/2010

Hi - JahCai has been to, since age 3, 4 schools in Boston and 3 here in Georgia and he is just 9. What I had to do was become a true mean person to see that consistency in his life is what he needed. I have a lot of friends in school systems and they like we parents get as mad as we do because our children are not taught because of teachers with a bias. I encourage you to stay on them and become a harder person, the more anger you internalize, the more hell you give them. Have fun, Its ALL for your baby.

Lisa - posted on 08/18/2010

Im sorry you are having to go thru this, I decided to pull my son out and homeschool him he had ADD and SID and it has just been so much better for me and for him. I hope you can get the help you need from someone.

Mary - posted on 08/18/2010

I will pray all goes well for you .
God bless

Jakethia - posted on 08/18/2010

Ms. or Mrs. Morgan, you are doing the right thing for your child by asking question about his or her education, if I was a parent of a special need child, I would do the same as you. They have some people who won't give any information out, but to people who they know. So, that why you have to do your research on your child and any other information as well. I advise you not to depend on public school too much, you have to start looking else where, but once again, I do wish you the best with your child education.

Jean - posted on 08/18/2010

I have experienced both sides of the school dilemma, first as a parent of a special needs child and now as an employee. My advice in this situation has not changed, even after seeing things from "inside" the school district. DO NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER. YOU are the person who knows your child best. YOU know what's best for your child. YOU are NOT ignorant. You have the right to call for an IEP meeting to make changes at any time. DO NOT let them bully you into accepting their terms. Your son is entitled to an education that meets his needs.

I started out my journey as a mother of a special needs child naive and meek. I learned with the help of friends and online research not to give in. I was the one who had to advocate for my son. It's not always an easy road. No one will offer services or equipment that are necessary for your child's development. You have to request them...over and over if that's what it takes. The saying "the squeaky wheel gets the grease" is true. Don't let them get you down.

Okay...I'm stepping off my soapbox now. I wish you the best of luck and hope that your son receives nothing but the best in his life.

Oh...in answer to what you may be thinking...yes, I am slightly crazy. lol

Deborah - posted on 08/18/2010

Thanks for sharing your story. I have had similar barriers and have so often been disappointed when the required action that was recommended in an IEP was never delivered. I kept praying and hoping that something would change, when what I really needed to do was to make some noise! You're right, we are our kids' advocates, we have to stand up for them and make the school system do its job. I had an appointment with a hospital paediatrician at one point and he asked, 'why are you here? this is the school's job, they should be doing this, this is not a health issue' - it really made me think differently about it. It WAS their responsibility. Silly me, I was expecting the educationalists to be the experts and tell me what needed to be done, and then actually do it. Unfortunately that wasn't true on any level.

Iridescent - posted on 08/17/2010

Fights I've had with our schools...
1 - my 3 year old autistic son was left in January during a blizzard at the wrong house, where nobody was home, by the bus driver. A neighbor found him 3 hours later. The school was found not guilty of neglect and maltreatment of a minor, the bus driver and company was found guilty. The bus driver was promoted!!! I addressed the issue with the school board and they chose to do nothing. I transferred him to an out of district school at local school expense (as open enrollment is not free or an option in Preschool), and all of my other children have since gone to the other school at our home district's expense without objections for Preschool.

2 - My second son was dropped off his IEP when he still had difficulties. I did not appeal, and am now having huge issues as a result (2 years later). The school agreed he needs help yet refuses to put him on an IEP. I requested the testing last year, and they delayed it and did the evaluation the day after school was released for the summer this year so I couldn't appeal their decision for months. Some shocking things came about because of this though! The school informed me they don't believe he was ever on an IFSP or IEP and called me a liar until I brought in my (signed) copies. I set up appointments with an excellent clinic, 4 hours from here, and my son is being fully evaluated. It's a slow process but I will certainly trust those results. His language, the biggest concern we had, was not tested by the speech therapist despite us specifically requesting it AND a 21 point lag on his IQ testing between nonverbal and verbal skills (23 points is automatic IEP required). They informed me that he can pronounce college level words (great) yet admitted that he lacks understanding of words that are his age level. Despite coming into our home and knowing our parenting, they said we need to take him to a museum this summer to improve those skills and make him read more. They also informed us that the fact that he is continually last to finish testing, he is being held in for recesses to finish it, and this year he may have to start coming in after school to finish tests (he is just starting 4th Grade). And homework last year took 6 HOURS daily, with him in tears. They did not pile on too much work. Something is wrong with his ability to do it though, and we don't know what. They said that's fine and he has to "learn to manage his time better". I do not find this acceptable at all. Anyway, all that said, I filed an appeal and requested an IEE this week. I was told by the District Manager of Special Education that the school was totally out of line with their entire process, SHE found his old IEP's within seconds of looking, and I will have my choice of two clinics that will perform his testing by Friday. I filed this less than 24 hours ago, and she's on vacation!!! I am so impressed. Things we will do once he is on an IEP again - he will be considered as having completed his tests and homework at a set time limit, and graded on that alone, not the unfinished portion. They will work with him on his reading and understanding vocabulary. He will no longer be disciplined for things not his fault, and he will be happier. Will the amount he learns decrease? Possibly, but his happiness is worth more to me. Also, through the course of the testing we are going through, it appears he may also be autistic and we missed it because his brother's autism is so severe we thought less was normal.

3 - One of our kids is missing an immune factor and definitely autistic. We had to fight for therapy, specifically sensory. Again, same speech therapist, agreed he needed a communication device and said she'd set him up with PECS and less than 2 months later refused to. He was nonverbal and still cannot express his needs, and he is 3 years old and it is important to his development. She will most certainly be in trouble over this as I am not happy and will report it to the child advocate as well as the special ed district manager. He has multiple food allergies, and during summer therapy he was given a food he's allergic to despite them promising us in the hour he was at the school no food would be served. It did cause problems, and now he will have a PCA with him any time food is present for this school year as a result. He is also going to the clinic for the full evaluation our other child is, and they set us up with PECS for him. So many things...

When you run into roadblocks, do all you can to go around them. There is always a boss! Always a reporting agency.

Iridescent - posted on 08/17/2010

I am in the process of fighting the school (again). It's been different issues each time, and is always frustrating. First, get duck skin. Don't feel sorry for the school any more! Don't listen to the sob stories. They are there to educate all the children as each child needs, and that includes yours. That's their job!

Next, get a child advocate. Each state has different names for theirs, and I've found a local one for us that is absolutely excellent. When school officials know an advocate will be present at a meeting, or that we're reviewing the proposed IEP with her, they are much more careful.

Use appeals! You can appeal any decision of the school's within a certain time frame (it states on the paper for each).

Cara - posted on 08/17/2010

Sabrina, was there anything in particular that helped you? Certain statements that the SD took notice of, certain advocates? We are starting the process right now and I want to have all my ducks in a row. Thanks.

Deborah - posted on 08/17/2010

Thanks for your response. In my experience, it HAS been about the teachers and their lack of insight and training about what could be going wrong, especially with the sublter forms of 'special needs'. Maybe at the base of this it is a funding issue - classrooms are quite full so teachers can't focus on kids who are well-behaved but not achieving.

Kimberly - posted on 08/17/2010

Wrightslaw.com is a very helpful resource for parents who are in this predicament and can offer advice on both the law and proven approaches to advocating for your child. I don't think you are in MA, but if you are, SPEDWatch is also a very helpful resource and does a lot of special education activism. Bottom line, it doesn't matter about the money or whether the school district has the service, if it is what your child needs in order to be in the least restrictive learning environment, it is what you should be fighting for. Unfortunately your situation is all too common and it is hard as a parent to not take what these "professionals" are saying to heart. Just remember that you are your child's best advocate. I'm glad it worked out for you this time. Hopefully, you won't have to go through this again.

Kendra - posted on 08/16/2010

It's not about the teachers or the students, it's about money. Public schools are 100% political these days and it's sad. We live in a rural community so special education is really challenging here. My best advice is to keep your lawyer on speed dial. It's sad that we have to resort to such drastic measures, but we do not have any other choice.

Deborah - posted on 08/16/2010

I know what you mean. My son has specific learning difficulties (dyslexia, spatial awareness, etc.). The 'experts' say the earlier you diagnose the better... well, I've been trying to to get that for 5 years! One teacher said he just needs to work harder, another said he's a perfectionist and afraid to fail, another said he's just not that intelligent... All mainstream teachers, none of whom seem to know anything about the basics of different learning styles. Incredible in this day and age, I think. Finally at the end of last year we found a school that caters for kids with learning difficulties. It costs heaps, but I'm praying it'll be worth it in the end. At least they understand how intelligent he is! I hope you've passed your education obstacles now and your son gets all his needs met.

Sabrina - posted on 08/14/2010

Hi Ashley, I pray all goes well for you.

Ashley - posted on 08/14/2010

My son has also been to 3 different schools. And I've probably been walked all over because I'm also quiet and passive. This school year will be a new school so we'll just see how it goes.