RAD Reactive Attachment Disorder?
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Kim - posted on 12/08/2011
I have a step daughter that has RAD..she was taken by the state from her bio mother 3 or 4 times...she had broken bones etc. My husband (her father) wasn't married to her mother..when she was first born he would go to see her and she was always laying in her bed screaming..the mother would be very upset she couldn't get her to stop crying. Daddy would pick her up, hold her, sing to her and rock her...and immediately she would fall asleep which angered the bio mother to the point she wouldn't let daddy (17 yrs old at the time) see his babygirl. He moved out of town with his mother...lost contact and didn't know until a year ago the bio mother had been forced by DHS to put his daughter up for adoption when she was 4 almost 5 years old) or she would be forced to give up the baby she was pregnant with at the time. It was very hard on him when he learned the truth..exspecially since when they would take childsupport (present and past) out of his pay check and he would call DHS to ask where she was so he could see her (this was when he found out she had been adopted)...one social worker told him "We don't have to tell you if we adopt your child out".
Here are the most common symptons...hope this helps you.
Attachment Disorder Symptoms
• Superficially engaging & charming
• Lack of eye contact on parents terms
• Indiscriminately affectionate with strangers
• Not affectionate on Parents’ terms (not cuddly)
• Destructive to self, others and material things (accident prone)
• Cruelty to animals
• Lying about the obvious (crazy lying)
• No impulse controls (frequently acts hyperactive)
• Learning Lags
• Lack of cause and effect thinking
• Lack of conscience
• Abnormal eating patterns
• Poor peer relationships
• Preoccupation with fire
• Preoccupation with blood & gore
• Persistent nonsense questions & chatter
• Inappropriately demanding & clingy
• Abnormal speech patterns
• Triangulation of adults
• False allegations of abuse
• Presumptive entitlement issues
• Parents appear hostile and angry
Any of the following conditions occurring to a child during the first 36 months of life puts them at risk:
• Unwanted pregnancy
• Pre-birth exposure to trauma, drugs or alcohol
• Abuse (physical, emotional, sexual)
• Neglect (not answering the baby’s cries for help)
• Separation from primary caregiver (i.e. Illness or death of mother or severe illness or hospitalization of the baby, or adoption
• On-going pain such as colic, hernia or many ear infections
• Changing day cares or using providers who don’t do bonding
• Moms with chronic depression
• Several moves or placements (foster care, failed adoptions)
• Caring for baby on a timed schedule or other self-centered parenting
In Oklahoma there is a place called "Shadow Mountain" that will take minors and work with them, help them understand what is going on and do therapy. She is living with us now...she did go to Shadow Mountain for a while and they did help some but no...she still exhibits all of the above.
Here are a couple of links that may help:
1st I recommend Nancy Thomas...she raised 4 RAD Children herself and I have been told she never turns a RAD child away...Here is her link!
Long but full of info and links at the bottom of the page...
Hope this helps! Happy Holidays to all!
Dawna - posted on 06/15/2010
Are your children adopted? The reason I am asking is that children with attachment disorders usually feel abandoned. They do not get a lot of affection or holding when infants. There are specialist who can asses and give you some contacts. They do have therapy if need be. Good luck
Maria - posted on 06/15/2010
My step-daughter has this amongst other serious mental health issues.It is a very tough thing to understand and go through. Not too sure if you have looked it up under WEBMD. It might be able to help you out some in figuring out whether or not this is something they may have.
She is newly diagnosed with this,but we have always known that there was things wrong with her, it just took the right doctor to finally get past the blue eyes and curly brown hair to help us out. It may take sometime and many different doctors, but don't give up if you really think there is something wrong. You know your children more than any person out there. Trust you gut and have faith in God to lead you down the right path.
Take care and good luck. I am here if needed
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