Siblings of special needs children

Amanda - posted on 05/25/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I have a 6 year old who just told me she is jelouse of her younger sister who has PDD NOS. She feels left out and told me she wants her sister to die. How do you deal with this? I want both of my daughters to feel loved.

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Jane - posted on 05/26/2011

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Early on my daughter and I set aside one day a month to go shopping. Even at age three she loved this, and the first word she could read after her name was "sale." The next was "clearance." I have also made a point of listening to her complaints, often issued when the two of us were alone in the car, and of praising some aspect of how she deals with him. When she got a little older she went to Girl Scout sleep away camp, and when she got to be about 10, she got to go to a really great camp in the Texas hill country, where she could just be herself, not the girl with the crazy brother. In fat, she liked the camp so much, and the staff liked her, that for the past two years she has been a counselor there, the youngest they have ever had.

I make sure that she knows that I know how hard it is to have him as a brother and that I appreciate her.

Schyla - posted on 05/25/2011

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sounds like Your big girl needs some reassurance and you need to make arrangements to have a special day once a month or even a week with just her. My Oldest is high maintenance and has SPD (sensory processing disorder) she requires A LOT of my time and I often feel like my younger two get left out so I try and include them Goose dose all of the same exersises as Miss Bit when we do her sensory diet in the morning and once a week I'll take Just Goose with me to the store or over to Grandma's and X-man is only 6 months old so he gets a lot of one on one time as well. I have a good suport system so even though it's not always easy I trust Miss Bit with her dad or Grandma for half an hour while I take the time to spend with Goose. A little one on one with just her a nice long walk in the park with ice cream where you can talk and tell her how special she is and ask her ways you can help her feel more included she's 6 but there is a lot she can do!

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Amanda - posted on 05/26/2011

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@Jane thank you for the help. My daughter and I do a daisy troop toghter that is one of our one on one time.

Amanda - posted on 05/26/2011

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@Schyla thank you. I do do mommy daughter day with her and we do a daisy troop together.I try to make special days just for her.

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