"Welcome to Holland " I have 2 s/n adult children this was shared with me many years ago

Ericka - posted on 04/13/2012

Thank you Deborah, your page is the most inspiring.

Christy - posted on 04/11/2012

I absolutely LOVE this! My pediatrician gave me a copy years ago (1980-something) when my son was diagnosed with ADD, motor dyspraxia, dysgraphia and numerous other developmental issues. When I would get discouraged at a slump in progress I would read this and my energy for helping him thru the tough spot was renewed! I've passed it on to many other mom's over the years. Every time I read it I still feel spurred on!

Deborah - posted on 04/09/2012

You are very welcome Erika. Real quick I will share will you that when my daughter was born I was first told I would bury her. When it was obvious she would survive I was told I would have to institutionalize her. Shannon was in a wheelchair and I was told she would never walk. Shannon does have a shunt and has had 6 brain surgeries and a 12 hour back surgery. On Sept 14th of 2008 when I married my husband, Shannon walked me down the aisle. In April of 2010 Shannon married her husband Paul and is doing fabulous. She will celebrate her 29th birthday on May13th!

I promise you will learn more from your 2 little girls then ever imagined! Mt very best to you and your family Erika!

Ericka - posted on 04/05/2012

This story is right on the nose. I cried while I read this. it is so hard to explain to other people when they say "what is wrong with them" and I say "nothing". I love my twin girls so much and could not ask for anything more than the adorable sweet daughters god gave to me. When they were first diagnosed with developmental delay/speech delay/sensory/anxiety at 2 years old, now they are soon to be 7 years old, I thought they would never be able to experience a normal life, but their challenges made me realize, what everyone views as a normal life is actually what we make of life and how we accept life's challenges/opportunities. Everyone has them and everyone is special in their own way. I love this story and printed it to keep as there are so many people that don't understand challenges /opportunities in life. Thank you for sharing this story with us.

Linda - posted on 04/02/2012

This was amazing and brought tears to my eyes, You truely are very blessed.

Hazel - posted on 02/05/2009

i hope you don't mind but i had to keep a copy of these poems and put them on my page,

i've a few friends with 'special needs' kids and a few have taken these and posted them on there own support sites. i thought i'd let you know, it's toughing the hearts of a lot more mum's :)

Libby - posted on 02/02/2009

Thanks for such a beautiful reminder.

Deborah - posted on 02/02/2009

You are very welcome. I never have made it to Italy, I am sure it is a very beautiful place but I must say I have quite enjoyed Holland!!!!
Below are 2 other poems please enjoy < soft smile > :
The Special Mother

by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice,
a few by social pressure and a couple by habit.
This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.
Did you ever wonder how these mothers are chosen?
Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth
Selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.
As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew."
"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Celia."
"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
Finally he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who knows no laughter?
That would be cruel."
"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair.
Once the shock and resentment wear off she'll handle it."
"I watched her today.
She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of it's own.
She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive.
Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.
She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.
She will never take for granted a spoken word.
She will never consider a step ordinary.
When her child says momma for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.
I will permit her to see clearly the things I see--ignorance, cruelty,
prejudice--and allow her to rise above them.
She will never be alone.
I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life
Because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air. God smiles.
"A mirror will suffice."

This is not quite a poem but it certainly hits home !!!
Why We Drink As Parents !!!!

A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
"Hello?"
"Is your daddy home?" he asked.
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
May I talk with him?"
The child whispered, "No,"
Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes,"
"May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No,"
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked,
"Is anybody else there?"
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman".
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked,
"May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy" whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman," came the whispered answer.
Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A helicopter"answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again, whispering, the child answered, "The search team just landed a helicopter,"
Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle... "ME"
little Kevin

Hazel - posted on 02/02/2009

my son was born 3yrs ago with distal arthrogryposis, this was a poem given to me to help me when he was only a few months old. it's helped me to come to terms with my wounderful son.

i've enjoyed holland ever since :)

thank you for reminding me of it.

Heather - posted on 02/02/2009

Someone gave me a copy of that when my daughter was born (15 years ago now) - and Im glad I got diverted to Holland, my Special Needs daughter is indeed very very Special x

Deborah - posted on 02/01/2009

Not at all. My Children are now 24 and 25. When I was in labor with Shannon I was actually told I would bury her, then she lost the ability to walk and we were told she would never walk again. On Sept. 14th Shannon walked me down the aisle!!!. There are 2 quotes I really appreciate and live my life by. 1 ) Live in the solution < I find we as humans love to see everything as a problem when it is just as easy to see everything as an experience in life and what could be the best solution for us???> 2) Say what you mean and mean what you say!!!!! lol Speaks for itself lol I use to be shy, then God saw me as a special parent and blessed me with 2 very wonderful children. Might I say the quiet soft spoken person I once was no longer existed lol.
I am so happy you found "Holland" this is one of my Favorite Poems
Have a great day,
Sincerely,
Deborah

Dixie - posted on 02/01/2009

What a beautiful way to describe the experience.  I hope you don't mind if I use this description when working with soeof my parents.  I am a special ed teacher and this is great!!!

Christy - posted on 01/31/2009

Thanks for thepost that is soo true.  I have a 12 yo daughter with Spinabifida and that was how I felt for sooo long I could truely enjoy her and finally some one told me that if I didn't enjoy her now I would always wonder what I missed out on and what a joy she is.

Christy