General Questions

Sarah - posted on 02/15/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Hello,
I have a daughter who is now 5 and was diagnosed at 2 but i still have days where I feel like I did something wrong and I feel like I am all alone dealing with the daily duties of managing her diabetes. My husband is around but his work hours always seem to leave me dealing with pump changes, sick days, and fighting to get her to sit still. She has also been hospitalized 2 times with in about 6 months. Both for DKA I feel like I am overwhelmed and that somedays I feel REALLY bad for her because she is the one that is going to have to deal with this for the rest of her life. I even lay in bed sometimes at night wondering what her life will be like when she goes to school next year and what can I do to make HER life easier. I also have a 1 year old and I feel like dealing with my oldest daughters diabetes makes me "favor" her and that I am leaving my youngest out. I just didn't know if this was a normal thing that will go away with time or is it always a mothers worry.

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5 Comments

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Anaya - posted on 09/26/2011

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Hi Sarah, wow my response is two years late, but I hope your daughter and you are doing better with her diabetes. I have an 11 year old daughter with type 1 and she was diagnosed when she was 3 1/2 yrs old and at the time I had a 1 1/2 yr old son. I too went through the struggle of what did I do wrong and is she going to be ok. I would have to say one of my biggest obstacles was and still is is not to be a helicopter mom. I can't help but worry a little more for her due to her diabetes, but for the past 2 years I have been volunteering at the local diabetes camp and I have learned a lot and am still learning.

As I said she is 11 and is managing well on a pump. There are days when she goes through the "I hate this" phase and she rebels by not checking her sugars and says she has. All in all she is a great kid, involved in sports who loves to read and spend time with her friends.

I also have a son who is now 9 and he felt for a very long time that she was my favorite because we focused so much attention on her diabetes and he didn't understand that. He has been going to the diabetes camp with us and has learned alot about diabetes and what it takes to manage and he now has a better understanding of what all our focus was for. Not that we loved him less.

I hope all is well for you and your family.
Anaya

Raewyn - posted on 04/06/2009

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Hi Sarah,  My son, Deacan is almost 8yrs old.  He was diagnosed when he was 9 months old.  I know exactly how you're feeling!!  I don't think you'd be normal if you didn't feel this way at times.  I still do and it's been 7yrs.  I know how heartbreaking it is to see your child go through what our children go through on a daily basis.  And it sounds to me like you're doing a wonderful job!!  You will go through stages of feeling like this.  It is unfair and as mothers, we tend to worry about our children in general - but when you throw this into the mix - it seems to magnify and intensify how we feel. 



As for your younger child ( I also have a nearly 3yr old), don't worry about feeling like your playing favorites.  When your older child goes to school - you'll have more time for the youngest one.  Kids are so resilient.  Moreso than we give them credit for alot of the time.



WIth that being said - you're doing a wonderful job, you should be proud of yourself!!!  Anyway, this is my first post on this forum - and I'm here if anyone needs to talk!!



Raewyn   :)

Michelle - posted on 03/31/2009

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Hi, I am not a mom with a little one with type 1 diabetes, but am an expectant first mom who has type 1 diabetes and has had it for 23 years. So long as you teach her to not be afraid to tell her friends that she has the disease, and to know what to do to care for the highs and the lows, and that checking her blood sugar levels always is very important, and that it is ok to have the naughty snacks sometimes I believe will help. I know she is only 5 but does she have any interest in learning, and is she capable of understanding the importance of being able to manage the pump with you just watching? That may help her when she goes to school. My mom was very active in making sure that the administration as well as the teachers knew and understood what to do in both instances. I know when I was a kid ( I was 7 years old when I was diagnosed), the JDRF had a local office in Seattle and my mom was able to get instructional videos to take to my first grade class after I was diagnosed to help my classmates understand my disease. I was a big fan of Mary Tyler Moore as a kid as she had the same disease that I had, so if she is into the Jonas Brothers, I would find all the information on Nick Jonas as a diabetic. Are there any support groups in your area? My mom and I belonged to one, it would have instructional time for the parents and the kids would get together during that time and play games, eat snacks, and have a little instruction as well. I feel like I am rambling but I do hope that this helps some. I don't think you are leaving out the youngest, it just takes a lot to manage diabetes, and if you can equip her now with it being no big deal, then that should help when she is a teenager. I would also make sure that the doctors you see for her diabetes are not the dread and dooom kind of doctors, you know the ones who only point out what you are doing wrong and what the consequences are. That turned me off from doing what I was supposed to do, I finally did better at managing it myself when I was older and had an endo that finally told me, I don't need to tell you what you are doing wrong, you already know that, but I am going to tell you what you are doing right, and go from there. I do appologize again for rambling, but do hope that there is some stuff in here that will help.



michelle

Emma - posted on 02/16/2009

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hello

my daughter megan was diagnosed as diabetic in may last year she was 7, it was a shock but we threw ourselves into caring for her and trying to make her feel like she wasnt different from other children megan is on 4 injections a day and dose really well on them, but over the last couple of days i have found it really difficult to cope with she is bruised all over from the injections but never complains, and i am sick of telling people that everything is ok and she is ok because its so sad that this is forever (she will still be coping with it long after she moves out etc). i worry about how she will cope in the high school, with friends, even if she will get a boyfriend who will understand it all (i know it is still along time off but all of a sudden it has made me feel so bitter towards it all and then feel guilty coz she seems fine with it all.

am here to chat if you fancy chatting

emma

Emma - posted on 02/16/2009

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hello

my daughter megan was diagnosed as diabetic in may last year she was 7, it was a shock but we threw ourselves into caring for her and trying to make her feel like she wasnt different from other children megan is on 4 injections a day and dose really well on them, but over the last couple of days i have found it really difficult to cope with she is bruised all over from the injections but never complains, and i am sick of telling people that everything is ok and she is ok because its so sad that this is forever (she will still be coping with it long after she moves out etc). i worry about how she will cope in the high school, with friends, even if she will get a boyfriend who will understand it all (i know it is still along time off but all of a sudden it has made me feel so bitter towards it all and then feel guilty coz she seems fine with it all.

am here to chat if you fancy chatting

emma

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