Has any mom lost custody of a their child due to drug use?

Melissa - posted on 02/03/2010 ( 207 moms have responded )

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Well I have and I want Gregory back, its been 31/2 years since I have had him in my custody. Gregory will be 4 years old Feb. 4th and the paternal aunt and uncle refuse to let me see my baby Gregory:(They are determined to keep me from him (they even have Gregory calling them mommy and daddy!!!) I have been trying to get custody of him since I lost him. I refuse to give in or give up!! Is there any mom that can give me some advise? or maybe just to vent...It's almost Gregory's 4th Birthday and this hurts my heart soooo much that once again I will be missing another part of his little life. I still have my 16 yr old son Robbie with me, that I got custody back in 2007 after loosing him for 1 yr. I love them both with all of my heart:)

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Let me just say that you people use the word disease like a scapegoat. It is like you think that because it is considered a disease it is ok to shoot up, abandon your kids, abuse your kids and excuse yourself from the responsibility that you, yourself created. Then when the addict cleans up for a couple months they think that because they are clean for the time being that they should have all rights to their children. I am sorry but that is a bunch of BS. I have been addicted to things before. Nicotine was my weakness. I told myself that it isn't right. God gave me my body to take care of and to me using tobacco and using drugs is a form of suicide. You are killing your body, it may be a little slower suicide but suicide none the less. I dont care what you are addicted to when you set your mind to something, you can accomplish it. If you want to quit, you can. It is sad how many people are treating drug abuse with drugs. Methadone clinics are a dime a dozen. WTF how did this behavior become acceptable????
My words are not ignorant, heartless or ugly they are the TRUTH. Sometimes the truth hurts dear! I do know my babies bmoms past, I have tried to help her many times, she chose the drugs. I know what my child is going to have to go through because of her BMs choices, ignorance, lack of maturity and lack of common sense. It is the children that are hurting because of this stupid 'disease' word you people like to lean upon. GROW UP AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE CHOICES YOU MADE!!!
The whole BS about "when you can't say something nice dont say anything at all", that is crap. Everyone has been quiet for too long. You people need to be "called out" on your idiocy. It is NOT acceptable to take, snort, shoot up or smoke drugs. PERIOD.
If you are not going to be adults and take care of the responsibility that is yours, do not bring these babies into this world. It is not fair to them or the true parents who love them. I am about to go through court with the BM and you better bet she is gonna have one hell of a fight. She will NOT win. The BF is on my side, even her family is on our side. She can see her but she will never ever have custody of my kid nor will my child ever spend a night with her!
I have never made excuses for my actions. My choices are mine and I own them. I have made mistakes, had bad behavior and done things I ultimately regret but I OWN THEM, I admit them and I have made things right. I am about to bring this out in the open. Everyone needs to have zero tolerance for drug abuse!

Jennifer - posted on 07/28/2013

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Marci, you obviously are not a very sophisticated person due to the fact that you keep referring to drugs that are SNORTED and such. If you could put your anger aside and actually take the time and have the desire to educate yourself correctly you might begin to understand the nature of addiction. The CDC just released a report that drug overdose deaths from prescription painkillers spike among women. Many MDs in our country can be held accountable for these. Do you not have anyone in your family or maybe a close friend who has suffered from depression? Do you fault them for having a chemical imbalance in their brain? Well, that is exactly what happens when a person abuses a drug. They began changing the balance of their brain chemicals. At that point their body in essence creates a disease called addiction. Disease: A pathological condition in which the normal functioning of an organism or body is impaired or disrupted resulting in extreme pain, dysfunction, distress, or death. Sound to you like symptoms an addict might display? I'm not saying you don't have the right to feel anger at an addict, especially if you have dealt with their dishonest and often destructive behaviors. But you have always have the choice to use boundaries with them. If they really want to clean up it is one of the hardest journeys they will ever embark on. It takes the human brain at approx 12-17 months of abstinence before showing significant return to pre drug use brain function. You would probably be shocked how many people you live around, or work with have had this problem. It's not called a "hidden epidemic" for no reason. People don't want to be judged. And being plain mean serves no good. And last but not least I find it very hypocritical of you to reference GOD in one of your post. You don't act or sound very Christian like in your many post. Do you think your words would be acceptable to GOD? I think we should leave the judging to him.

User - posted on 08/15/2014

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This message is for Mindy and any other moms going through social services, dfs, cps, ect. 1. Stay clean 2. Go to meetings 3. Keep track of everything said by everyone, what i mean by that is, phone calls with social worker, calls with foster parents, visits with kids= right down how they went, document document document! 4. Do everything social services tells you, parenting classes, domestic violence, drug program, ask for more of what you can do so you can learn more 5. Don't forget the sponsor, work your steps 6. Get a place where your kids can live in when they come back, most places want you to have stability before they come home and for a while. 7. Have food in the place at all times, even if its ramen noodles, beans, rice. 8. Remember this to shall pass and try to remember one day at a time. Don't try to rush these things you didnt become an addict in one day, it will take time to get your kids back but take this time to focus on making yourself a better mom and person, dont do this just for your kids or you might relapse. You guys are more then welcome to email me at chrystal tindle @ gmail .com

Elizabeth - posted on 08/04/2014

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I'm sorry, but we, as a society, have to put the needs of the kids first...drug addiction is a terrible disease, but when parents continue to use and their children have to be in the care of relatives or strangers, the parents give up the right to raise their children. Children need to bond to their caregivers, they need stability, they need to have reassurance and nurturing that using parents can't provide. There are just some things in this life that we don't get a second chance at-and parenting is one of those things. My daughter got clean when she found out she was pregnant. Once he was born, she was resentful of having to change his diapers, of how much baby things cost and was frustrated by the demands of parenthood. She was living with me and I was caring for the baby once I got home from work until morning. When he was two months old, she returned to crack cocaine and hasn't been able to maintain a reasonable length of sobriety (30 days). After a year went by, without visitation, without consistent contact, I chose to adopt the baby. The adoption is final and I know my daughter loves him, but she has missed all of the milestones, all of the laughter, all the runny noses, ear infections, asthma and colds. I've done it and he relies on my to fulfill his basic needs and to give him love. His needs are more important that my daughter's upset about losing custody. If she gets clean, she is welcome to be a part of the family, to visit and to get to know my little boy, but until then, I will protect him from chaos, from fear, from the bad decisions, bad people and bad places that come with drug addiction. I worked with CPS for a long time and saw how tormented kids were from worrying about their drug addicted parents and how heartbroken and angry they became after years of broken promises. Yes people can change and we should support their efforts, but not at the expense of little, vulnerable, easily damaged hearts of the children.

Oneheart1874 - posted on 07/14/2013

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Miranda
I am the *mom* you're talking about in your post. I married a wonderful man who had two wonderful but damaged kids due to years of instability of their birth mom and her drug addiction. She'd leave for days at a time during her scheduled visitation and leave the kids with her brother (a recovering crack addict). I have seen first hand the effects it's had on my children. I call them mine because I am the only mother they have known for over 3 years. Now with that said I know without a doubt that my kids birth mother loves them with all her heart but her need for the high is greater than the need of their relationship. My husband and I have been honest with our kids about the entire situation and when they ask questions. We are currently fighting her in court for she's seeking full custody and trying to take them away. I don't really know what she is thinking but she has had both a dwi and possession charge within the last year. I do know however that she has the choice to clean up for 72 hours to have a supervised visitation which she has only done 2 times in the the last 3 years. Addiction is a stronge and powerful force and only the addict can choose to get clean. I feel we should reach out and pray for the addict especially when children are involved. I have to think of my kids safety and their birth mom has to prove sobriety before being alone with them again.

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Carrie - posted on 10/13/2017

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Im curious if you even bothered to help your daughter at all or if you just cut her throat

Carrie - posted on 10/13/2017

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Omg!!! I hate people like you!!! It is a disease and people like you are stuck up and think youre better than those with an issue. I wonder if your kid becomes an addict if you will say the same. You have NO IDEA what its like and you really tick me off!!

Claredaly02 - posted on 07/19/2017

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Please help me
.
. im a mum three kids on cps at risk register.im doing everythung they ask... I have prior druf use im clean. Now i go drug clinic weekly testin all negative result only one false positive.. My kids are 100% attendence at acgool jabs upto date homea clean tidy but ny sw hates me an now wants a P L O order... I cant sleep eat im terrified ill lose my babies

Angela - posted on 07/12/2017

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Is there anyone who knows a bettet way? I struggled from addiction and I am almost two years clean and the reprocussions are hard to deal with. My kids are messed up..my mental issues are still hard to deal with. If my kids werent removed completely from me but instead we wetr sent somewhere together for rehabilitation. I believe that would have worked out way better . When the family dynamics are played into the situation..it just makes things worse. My kids are told bad things about me becauae I am sick. And I still dont have my boys full time. I struggled financially as well. The system has failed me. I cant get help financially very easy. I wasnt grtting help from their dad and suddently he steps in and gets prinary custosdy of the boys but not my daughter. Its just a mess how addicts ate treated with getting help with their children. The system seems to make things worse instead of better. The stigma for addicts is terrible. I wonder if woman can join together to help woman in the future. Like maybe instead of dfs or cps grtting involved and seperating famiky..they can go to treatment with their parents or have supportive family members help while parents do treatment and drug court..etc...any ideas? I know as a parent..feeling as a failure is life threatening to me and other addicts. Loosing your kids is life threatening. Mentally it makes things worse. Like i said. I still struggle with my situation and my circle around me remains disfunctional...families need real help...

Dayanara - posted on 07/03/2017

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Hi, Brandi, you can call a report to your local hot line, ask them to do a welfare check. you do need to provide and address so they can perform the visit, they will be taken to their local drug testing facility, if it is positive they will be a investigation open, if you the social worker will ask if you or another family member are willing to take the minor or is the child taken to a foster home. I made the call and I made it very clear to the social worker under no circumstances will I allow for my grandson be removed from his home. my daughter had to leave. she has not maintained the what the court ordered. I have taken all the steps necessary to be his foster guardian. the way I see it my daughter was raised and given all the opportunities and chose the opposite, this child will be provided, a safe, drug free loving home. its the hardest call I ever did, but looking into his safe, loving eyes I know I did the right thing. as for mom, I pray every night she is safe and she sees the need to go inpatient rebab and stay sober.

Carly - posted on 06/19/2017

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Brandi,
You can become guardian and get baby away from them. I did this for my grandson. Hope things are better for that precious one soon.

Brandi - posted on 06/03/2017

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I have a niece and her and her husband are addicts. They are homeless jumping from one crack house to another. They have a 2 year old son. How do I help this baby? I don't know what the first step is to take. Thanks

Brandi - posted on 06/03/2017

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Hello, I am looking for advice. I have a niece and her and her husband are addicts. They are homeless now and are jumping from one crack house to another. They have a 2 year old and I am trying to figure out what I can do to help him. He needs to be away from those people. I don't even know where to start. Can someone give me advice please. Thanks

Kodie - posted on 04/21/2017

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Thank you Marci, whoever, wherever you are. It is becoming a taboo to call an addict out for what they really are. I have been on both sides of the fence. I have also had children and raised another's child as my own due to drugs and just plain selfishness. I am appalled that people are turning a choice to go experiment, re-experiment, and again and again, then get hooked and have your body fight against you trying to stop the ise of drugs a disease. I don't and will never understand why when we choose to try a drug , all the sudden it's a disease. Then when you lie cheat steal abandon hurt and keep doing it over and over to the people you supposedly love, you get to call it a disease. So dancing is a disease. I tried it and now im hooked. I can't stop dancing. If it were between loved ones and a dance competition , I need that rush of dancing, so can I be treated like i have cancer now. Drug addicts need an excuse. And if you defend the disease theory it's because you need an excuse or you don't want to admit you raised an imperfect person, guess what we are all imperfect in some way, doesn't mean you get an out because you need help getting off the thing you got yourself addicted to.my step Che , who calls me mommy who I have raised since 1 , doesn't even want to see his bioegg donor. She walked out, back in, abused, neglected, used and repeated til he was 5. We fought so hard for him and finally she left on her own. I'm not saying everyone is like this. There are functioning addicts that love their children and would never put them in danger . There are also people who use society's faults and enabling ways to their advantage to cry foul when cps or whoever finds them to be unfit, which btw is really hard to do in many states. Almost impossible to sever a biological maternal relationship, as it should be. But dont think for a second that you put yourself in this position. That being said, if you really want your children back and you are ready to step up, do not give up, the more you push the more they will see your pain and unrelenting love for your children. If you think that it will hurt the kids to be uprooted though, fight for visitation first then talk to them about more in the future. They are in tje position they are in because of you no one else. So please think about their hearts minds and souls before your own. I don't want to hurt feeling but as I said I have been on both sides of the drug and custody battles , this is the ugly truth we all need to see. Love and luck to you and every e else here

Kizzybear1600 - posted on 03/06/2017

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For got to add this I told my daughter b4 I sign the cps papers for custody I need you to know that I will not ever allow unsupervised visits n I will not ever allow you to take her any place w out me

She said she understood

Reason I wanted her to know this
Is w her being in my custody
I will never allow her to be put in a postion
Where she cld be taken again

I'm her last stop last hope

I allow mom supervised visits or any other family

She has been thru too much

N it's time for her to get on w her life

By the way the 1 st removal my daughter went to classes for 10.5 months n it was never enough for cps
Hired A lawyer was no help at all

So wen cps came to paternal grandparents home n removed child

My daughter n babys dad
Signed for me to have her n no services
N went thru another lawyer n got court custody 8 months later

Kizzybear1600 - posted on 03/06/2017

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Deanna I know it hurts that your kids choose to continue living w your parents after all the cps n court stuff
But I'm sure your thankful that your parents stepped up n took your kids in n they are content w them n you still get visits

My Daughter had her 2 yr old daughter taken
July 15 th 2013

She was given to a paternal great aunt
She had her for 60 days n gave her back to paternal grandparents that we're using meth

July 23rd 2015 2 yrs later paternal grandparents caught a case w cps
Grandparents Tested positive for meth

Both times the child tested positive for meth
Because paternal grandmother smoked it w her in her lap

She has asthma n they had 6 people smoking cigarettes around her in there home

I got her that day
4 yrs old
I'm the maternal grandmother

I got court custody of her
She has been w me for 20 months
She is safe n in healthy environment n
Happy healthy n growing now


My daughter was so thankful I got her now

I plan to adopt her

My daughter is bi-polar
This is her only child thankfully

Some grandparents refuse to take their grandchildren ín

I've had a tight bond w her since day one
So very thankful I have her now
She is 6 yrs old now

Bars6633 - posted on 01/17/2017

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I understand what she going through because I be there I had 5 I didn't lose rights but custody of 4 of them and I was clean for 9 long year then my only brother passway it hard for me and relapse now I just lost my mom Monday morning this month and she was raising my youngest who 13 but the person who has custody of her don't want anymore and my little sister won't let me have because my daughter want go live with her big sister who lives same town I live

Carolfranco1980 - posted on 08/21/2016

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as my mum took my kids 10 yrs ago why im reading on pills to put her in hospital

Adopted - posted on 04/12/2016

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So your saying as a therapist that the child / children's bonding doesn't matter with the kinship / foster parents?? I hope you lost you right to practice because your still thinking like an addict .

Adopted - posted on 04/12/2016

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I have to voice my Opion here .. You haven't had your child in 3 1/2 years ? An your upset because he calls his caretakers ( parents) mommy & daddy? Look up the DEFINATION of a mother or Father your son is 4 years old an he knows the DEFINATION already . If you really loved him like you say you would be happy he's in a SAFE HOME now an has 2 PARENTS that love him dearly .

J - posted on 02/10/2016

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In a situation where any parent whether it be a father or mother would chose to do drugs in the first place and become addicted to it. I would say, you got exactly what you deserve. I can't explain how much it makes me mad for any children to be put in the situation that you put them in. I am an angry step mom of 3 kids whose biological mom still believes weed should be legal and has used and manipulated the state and government to help her. While still using on top of it, she has mental issues, ADHD, Biopolar, and another never ending lists of mental issues that she claims she has. She sells and abuses her adhd medication. (FACT: These are known facts because I know people who purchase these from her and have sold to her as well.) She wont get a job to pay child support and has been under DHS radar since 2008. That is how long I"ve been fighting for "my kids". DHS/CPS is another sad story in itself because they keep helping her after all her failed attempts. She also sleeps around and has had 4 other kids after the kids I have and has lost 1 child completely who was adopted by her sister. On top of it all her family has all shunned her and no longer want anything to do with her. She also has been in and out of an abusive relationship (two of the youngest kids are his) she had both of them during the time she had a No contact order. Her youngest son is only 2 months old. She has given one of my sons her adderal pills and claimed it was because he had a headache.. CPS/DHS did nothing at that point and said that she just needs more help. She has also told him that he has ADHD, so she described the systems and I've seen him google that systems so now he's convinced that he has it. We took him in for testing and he was fine! He's just a 13 year old lazy boy who doesn't like to focus if the subject doesnt benefit him or amuse him. He's done awesome in school, until the biological mother keeps reappearing back in their life. Shes been in and out of the kids life. Last time my kids seen or spent time with her was back in January 2015 and now she magically reappears again in December 2015. Since then he's lied to my husband and I face. Because their biological mom tries to kiss her kids butts by being nice and pretending to be their Best friend then a parent. She's told them its okay for them to sneak off to come see her without our permission. We have primary custody and on a strict visitation schedule because of all the trouble she keeps getting in to. I'm all for co-parenting but not when the parent is unfit. How she continues to tell her kids shes cool with whatever they do even if it was smoking weed. The oldest is 16, he understands how she is and he's the only one that doesn't care for her BS. But in the end he loves his mom and always gives his mom money. I'm all for her being in the kids life again but only if shes 100% drug free and really turning her life around, but she has not and nothing has changed!
The whole custody system in itself is the most corrupt system I ever seen. If it was my husband that was with the problem he would have had his rights terminated a long time ago. I use to chain smoke and then got pregnant, my father died of lung cancer and since I had my son I won't dare even pick up another cigarette, Yes growing up I smoked Weed, I use to take ecstasy pills every weekend. Then I grew up and had my kids and realized that my kids life means more to me then my own. I've witness addicts, hell I was an addict. So for people to say that there's more to addiction then what there really is, is a sad pathetic excuse. It's all will power and motivation. If your kids aren't the key to getting you to stop using or cut your bad habits, then maybe you don't deserve them. Let them live a happy life with or without you. Either they will grow up to resent you for all the negatives stuff you brought into their life or maybe they will be grateful you did what was best for them. You will only ruin your child life and they will blame you for everything that has happened to them. If you really are committed and heartfelt have been clean and kicking the addiction then I really do wish you the best, and hope that you grow up and act like an adult, let a lone a mother. In the end loving a child is not enough to want to have them back. They need discipline, they need to be cared for. They need a responsible guardian to teach them right and wrong. If you are a true mother you wouldn't wish your life on your own children. You want the best for them even if it means with another parent, guardian or adopted family.

Deanna - posted on 10/11/2015

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Hi I am looking to connect with other Moms who are or have been in my shoes. I am a Mother of 2 beautiful kids. Almost 2 years ago my husband and I caught a CPS case due to us using drugs. We got clean and did every thing the judge and CPS required us to do in our case plan for our kids to come home. Our kids were placed with my parents during this time. We recently had out 18months review and CPS said that our children have expressed that they want to continue living with my parents and do not want to come home. They would like to continue weekly visits with me. I wish we could just bring our kids home but at the end of the day I just want my kids to be happy. If that is living with there Grandparents instead of us then thats something I have to learn how to deal with. The judge will be terminating our parental rights next month. Then my parents will proceed with adoption. I have had a good relationship with my Mom lately and she said after court next month she will continue visits with my kids. CPS will no longer be involved in our life after they terminate my rights. My mom said she will allow more visits with the kids than CPS has allowed. That feels really good to know that she will still keep me involved. I am so very thankful and grateful for all she has done for my kids and what she has done for me. I joined CircleOfMoms to talk to other moms who have been through this or going through it. I am able to offer advice and just looking for an alternate outlet to my depression. Thanks for reading my post and hope to hear from someone!

Kim - posted on 09/21/2015

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Dear Melissa,

The addict tried to lie to trap my fiance, he had absolutely no clue she was a drug addict. He had gone out with some friends and this person and basically had a one night stand. The bio mother of our baby contacted him nd told him she was pregnant after telling him she couldn't get pregnant. In a nut shell not all other parents know about the drug addicted mother, so please stop judging people until you facts. Thank you

Pokemyhontass - posted on 09/19/2015

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Obviously like most have noted an addiction isn't picked up over night. Sometimes it's instantaneous. However it's is human nature to be a creature of habit. "What's yours?"Addicts aren't made over night which leads me to believe that most individuals were aware of the addicts habit ahead of time before conceiving a child with them. What responsibility are the ones pointing the fingers at the addicts for making a bad choice or decision but what about the bad choice and decision they originally made by having a baby with these "addicts" creatures of habit. When properly loved and substantially supported Noone should fall or fail. If all were truly in it for the children then the parent pointing the finger should get passed their own hurt or anger enough to realize that they're not resolving or helping the situation. Resolutions for everyone involved. What the hell did people do to get revenge on other parents when cps didn't exist. She's good enough to have your child to begin with, then maybe it's you taking away that child that made her the way she is. Don't blame her for your injustices

Kim - posted on 08/29/2015

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Hi! I wrote about my boyfriend and I getting custody of his son due to the mother taking drugs all through her pregnancy, including the day she went into deliver. After reading the birth report not only did the baby test positive for meth, but the baby test positive for alchol and marijuana. It was almost a full complete year of court proceedings, arguments between each other in what would be safe for the baby tovisit bio mama, ended up with sole custody, and now another year later we are a very happy family. The bio mother has been seen in bars, running the streets late at night and unkempt. We have chose to keep our baby safe and not allow bio mother to have visits unless she pays DHS for their time to supervise these visits. This bio mother has again chose not do the rite thing in the best interest of the baby. We would like you to know it's a very long hard road and very stressing, but be strong and follow your judgement and keep your grandchildren safe at all costs. I'll pray for you to have that strength and for your daughter to do what's rite. If she really wanted to see her children she would do the classes, parenting, child development, drug classes and whatever else that's necessary. Good Luck Grandma

Crystal - posted on 05/10/2015

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went out for his birthday and like most responsible adults had our children where we knew they would be well taken care of. we went and hung out with a few friends and while we were out we smoked a couple,well maybe 3-4 joints. and went home. enjoyed some peace and quiet. on sunday evening our kids came home and my middle daughter
came home and fell asleep. a few hours later when everyone else had gone to bed she started throwing up. i called my sister in law the next morning thinking it was something she ate and my sister in law said she had made pork chops mashed potatoes and green beans but that my middle daughter had barely eaten. then my youngest started throwing up and they started having diahrea and so i took all of them to the dr. the dr said it was a viral infection and gave me a probiotic and some anti nausea medicine. she said it could last up to 2 weeks and that it was contagious. she also said if i got sick that there was enough anti nausea medicine for me too that was monday . next thing you know i am stuck on the toilet too. all week. i was barely able to keep clean sheets on the bed, my dishes washed and food cooked. but i managed. however i was unable to get laundry done pick up floors and take my trash out. my husbanf had a dr appt. wednesday. again the nurse wanted a drug test so he told her to let him talk with dr. and he would. he talked with dr. and told her we had gone out for his b-day and was going to fail the drug test and he was concerned about cps coming back into our lives. she told him the test was between him her and the wall and then sent him to crisis worker who started talking about suicide. when he told me about this i thought it strange as his dr had gone over blood test results and said everything was perfect and
he had not had any manic episodes in months. 2 days later cps came and took our kids saying mhmr had called and said he tested for illicit drugs on drug test. accused me of doing methamphetamines which i do not do and refused to let me take a ua to prove said they wanted hair follicle. said not concerned with current use wanted to know about past use. i had done things before i had my kids as a teenager but had grown beyond that and now my past is being used against me. judge gave them conservatoship and this is hurting my kids now.

Crystal - posted on 05/10/2015

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i met my husband 1/2 years ago. dec.2000. his son turned 3 january 2001. i have been a mother every since.in 2005 i was pregnant for my first time. in july cps was called by his aunt who lived 2 houses away. she told them that i beat his child because he had a mosquito bite in his neck. she also said that my partner was beating me while i was pregnant. it was all lies. i had smoked marijuana early in my pregnancy but i quit but my partner still smoked. he was arrested in mid august for possesion. he spent one night in jail and was released on bond. it was a very stressful time,combined with the fact that i have always been very tiny and i had my daughter early. i was due oct. 5 and had her on aug.30, 2005. they forgot to do a drug test before i delivered her and tested us both after birth. cps came to the hospital and told me i needed to stay off the meth which i was not even doing. when they got drug results back they said the baby and i tested for marijuana and opiates. i did not even know what an opiate was. they concluded that it came from epidural(spinal) from csection. they closed the case. thirteen months later my husband and i were married. since then we have had 2 other girls. we have also had 4 other cps cases all of which were closed. in march my husband had a birthday. the weekend of his birthday my brother came and got my two older girls and kept them for the weekend. my stepson was with his grandfather and we paid a sitter to keep my youngest who was almost three weeks shy of being 2. a little more background on my husband, when i met him he had been out of hospital for about 5 months after having been in a housefire where he was badly burned and 2 of his friends had died. in 2004 he was diagnosed with P.T.S.D., Manic depressive disorder and BI-Polar disorder. he has been taking meds every since. in 2012 he was in a head on collision and was in the hospital for over a month. later found out i had been 2 weeks pregnant at the time. during his first week in the hospital they would not give him his medication due to the large amounts of other medication they were pumping into his body. after the first week they did start to give it to him but unfortunately it was not the exact medication he had been on. they finally got him the right one but left the wrong one in his "drawer" a nd several times they tried to give the wrong one to him but we caught their mistake. after his hospital stay even the correct medicine was not working like it had in the past. on march 24,2013 i had my last baby girl. in december of the same year my husband had a manic episode. so we talked with his dr. and they started trying him on different meds. for about 5-6 months he did well until he ran out of meds one day which happened to be a weekend and about 3 days before his next appointment. he was ok the first day but the second day he had a manic episode and as there was a known pedophile working at the apartment complex where we lived he had some words with the guy who called his boss over and had a criminal tresspass order put on him even though we had a lease. when my husband came back to the apartment to get his clothes they had him thrown in jail. over the next 9 months the dr. changed his prescriptions 4 more times adding new things taking him off things replacing things. he went from being on seroquel to being on seroquel and effexor. then seroquel and depakote. then seroquel and lithium. then lithium and zyprexa. during this time my husband was not very liked by others. every time he pissed somebody off with his mouth the law was knocking on my door with false allegations. in august we moved and he was not real friendly with new neighbors and in october cps showed up again. the allegations were that he was on amphetamines. he refused a mouth swab but i talked him into taking one so they came out and he told me to take mine first. it tested for amphetamines, which once again i did not even know what that was so my husband felt it was a set up and refused to take it, and since i denied it she said i would need to do a ua to rule it out. she said she would call randomly and we would have to go take it. so we did. i tested for marijuana and nothing else. i had admitted that we had gone out on our anniversary and smoked. my husbands test came back clean. they closed our case. at his next dr. appt. the nurse asked for a drug test. he had been going to mhmr now for over 8 years and had never had to take one before he had done many blood tests in the past but not any ua. as he had just come from getting his blood drawn he told them to get it from that or get it from cps as we had just taken the one from them. the nurse refused to let him see the dr. 2 months later he had no more refills and was a month away from seeing dr. so i called mhmr and they sent a refill. so back to march 2014. we

Melissa - posted on 04/07/2015

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Please go to rehab and take everything you can get from the program no matter how long it takes...Social Services will not leave you alone until you have completed the program requirements. When you get out of rehab they may let you go back home but you have to stay sober. Social Services will probably be in your life for a few months after rehab is over. Once they see everything with you is good with you and your family they will close the case....Please do not give them a reason to stay in your life or come back because they usually do not give chances...Good Luck and God Bless You and Your Family

Unknown - posted on 04/05/2015

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Brad u need to report this girl to child services wherever u live it's time people stand up and stop letting this bs go on don't be afraid do it for the child they deserve a good sober life

Unknown - posted on 04/05/2015

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Marci u are 1000% right it is based that these people think they can walk out leave us to raise their children and turn around years later and think oh I'm on methadone I'm clean so now I regret the decision I made isn't that they point is to give the child a stable home and stable people in their lives these people are drug addicts and no matter what will never fully change I totally feel u as I have custody of my nephew since birth and his stupid mother thinks she will get him back cause she on methadone but still acts like an addict w aggressive behaviors and still has no money no job and no place of her own LOSER! Please let me know how ur court case went as I too I'm sure will be going to court soon

Melissa - posted on 03/24/2015

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I don't blame you for feeling that way Brad. If she's not clean she doesn't deserve of course to have custody of your children, but still has the right as their mother to see them. Sometimes people need many trips to rehab to finally get the monkey of their back...sadly most fail. I think only 3%-7% quit using when getting help in inpatient/outpatient rehabs. I know many people that quit on their own after many years and many that have relapsed after several years. I don't know the whole story but I know from my own experience as a mother....we never stop loving our children ever. I know it seems as though we don't care because we are worried about the drug (very selfish) but the children are always 1st in our heart whether straight or high. Please don't give up on her...I know its difficult and frustrating.

Brad - posted on 03/24/2015

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people who get up in the morning and want to get high that have children have a choice. they make a bad choice and that is addiction. Im a father of an alcholic drug addict that made the wrong choices. she would say she had an addiction, but i beleive she made a choice when she was sober and now she is sober and wanting custody she is the same person,
3 times in rehab many times in hospital, it is not a risk we can take. many people in rehab have been there time and time again simply.
my wife has been there done that and now we have seperated she is telling everone she is clean
so do we give her the children and see how she goes.
no way

Sebrina - posted on 02/08/2015

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I just want to say my heart breaks reading this. I goodeled "my son's girlfriend is pregnant and doing drugs" and it populated this in the the search. My son ex-girlfriend is pregnant. I try to be a positive role model for her and direct her in the right direction. I try to show her love and support. I accept her past with the hope of changing as she is to become a mom. Becoming a mom gives motivation a new name. However I keep seeing stuff on her facebook that she is drinking, smoking weed and cigarettes, and last night snorting cocaine. So pictures are uploaded to her facebook or she is tagged while they are partying and by the next day she deletes them so no one can see them. Little does she know I screen shot them before she has the chance to delete them. Baby is due in 4 months. She isn't getting prenatal care. She has been to the Doctor twice since being pregnant. once for to the hospital for throwing up blood the second to get an abortion however she didn't go through with it. My heart hurts for this unborn child that she is feeding him or her things (drugs, alcohol, nicotine) and the baby doesn't have the choice to say no. With the baby not even being born yet, I don't know what I can do to save this baby Can someone please give me advice?

Jessica Lynn - posted on 11/21/2014

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Hi my name is jessica... i know what u are going thru same thing almost to the tee... my in laws are dicks too and wont let me be part of my girls lives either... now im having another and i dont feel all the way right about it at the moment... i believe its because of my girls being gone i dont want them to hear about me having another and then my husbands family tell them im replacing them... bcuz his family would do that... so wrong and hateful... they are so young amd dont need all the nonsense put in their heads u know... but honestly all i can really say is dont give up keeping fighting i know i am and i wont ever stop... stay strong girl... its hard but we got this... we have to show them whos kids they really are.... good luck and best wishes...

Jessica Jadon - posted on 11/09/2014

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Iam sorry to hear that but my child was not even at home with me whenever I lost my child she was with her aunt and her uncle in-law which is a cop for the county we stayed in which is Wayne county Goldsboro NC I let my child go with these crooks they kidnap my child and took her to another county that I know nothing about I was in a domestic violence day after I sent her off for the weekend just for the weekend and I never seen my child again when I called these people back to retrieve my child someone called my phone back private and said you ain't got no baby bitch and hung up the phone. So I call the department of DSS to find my child and that is when I called these people back and mad threat to them to bring my child back home by saying this if ya'll don't bring my child back home I was going to file kidnapping charges on each and everyone that is involved in my Childs kidnapping and before I know it about five sheriffs was knocking at my door with a domestic violence protection order against me and my child was not even at home with me or the father the night of the altercation between the father and I. They went got a lawyer to help them tell the most lies that I couldn't even think about telling on someone innocent went and told their lawyer that this whole situation happened in the Childs presents but it really didn't they had to make it seem like the child was with me and the father whenever all this stuff went down but it's not true at all they told their lawyer that I was doing drugs in front of my child that was not true and the father really don't do any type of drugs he just have a few brews whenever he get off of work from a long day at work and by the way we never had a domestic violence situation like that before

Dominique - posted on 09/02/2014

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I lost my child over drugs and now I am wanting to get my life straighten out But I am haveing to leave state to get some help . does that mean if i leave state can I come back and fight for my child . the town I live in you can't find anyone to get help from or no jobs here either

Jesica - posted on 08/13/2014

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Please share this with your friends!! These little girls want to come home & they are asking for your help! The only way to get the word out is to share. Thank you for taking the time to read the whole story! GOD BLESS!
https://fundrazr.com/campaigns/eqK0b/ab/23sYpd?psid=631349274415408aa1c95a716a3de71b&fb_ref=share__23sYpd

Snowprincess990001 - posted on 07/25/2014

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Well here goes I tested positive for meth and they took my three really great kids they are currently staying with my sister me and my sister don't get along and sometimes she tries her hardest to make everything on me a lil harder there I have been to treatment am almost 9 months clean and doing well I had unsupervised visits until other day my sister twisted some things that happened not sure what all was said but they changed me back to supervised visits and didn't bother to contact me get my side if story or anything my sister is who told me and I got it confirmed by caseworker way after fact sometimes I feel as if I am fighting a losing battle and feels like I will never get them back I am not sure what to do at this point just need someone to talk to maybe get some advice so I can get my babies home

Ella - posted on 07/24/2014

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Hi Anabel, why in the world would you say what does she expect when he hasn't been in her life for the last 3 and a half years? Yes, true that children deserve and need to be in a stable environment but just because a mom had a drug addiction back then doesn't mean she hasn't changed for the better. It doesn't sound like her family is really standing by her which is crucial for someone in active addition. As a therapist myself and from my own personal experience, people can change, however society and family members are always accepting, so before you judge a book by its cover, take a look at the contents:)

Louise - posted on 07/18/2014

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This is a message to Marcy, I have to say love, I'm not sure of ur age or ur ability to open ur eyes to the real world but u need to have a lot more insight and experience in the world to post a message like that. I am a heroin and crack addict and will be a drug addict till the day I die. I just won't be an drug addict actively using. I had a very bad childhood where I was sexually and physically abused from 2 years old, I was luckily adopted into a new family but unfortunately they disowned me when I became an addict? I have three a levels and have studied human behaviour and psychology for a couple of years. I am lucky enough to have been blessed with 3 children, 1 of them lives with his paternal grandparents and then when I had my next child I got clean and fought tooth and nail to get my daughter back from ss. Ss have always my children were never neglected or in need of anything physically or emotionally, the only problem was my drug use. I got my daughter back and due to being clean and winning the case, all the support I had suddenly disappeared and I began to struggle again. I then fell pregnant and at the same time managed to trace my biological family. I was suddenly unable to cope and resorted to the only thing I knew would block out the things I could not cope with, DRUGS. I then gave birth and had both babies taken off me. No one will ever understand the pain of a baby being taken away from u unless u have been through it. I take full responsibility for my actions and and now fighting again. I'm on a script reducing and fighting fighting fighting. I will get my babies back as they are my life and the only real family I have ever had. The feelings I have for my kids is like nothing I have felt before. Just because I have an addiction it does not mean I can't change and that I don't love my babies. I was told by one of my social workers, that as I never had a stable mum in my life then I am unable to be the mother my children need myself but how wrong was she as when I had a parenting assessment and psych analysis, I passed with flying colours. Now in my eyes I have been under a microscope and studied, how many other mothers have passed a test on whether they can successfully bring up a child. My issue is drugs and I am will succeed in my battle against them so may before judging others have a long look at ur self because I know that unless I am perfect in every way I can not judge another human being especially when u don't know how or y they are in the situation they are in. Sorry to be harsh but u have no idea what it's like trying to forgive herself for choosing drugs over everything in ur life and not only that does it not tell how powerfull I thing it is to take over people's lives. And big love to u Lindsay for doing what u do and it's sad that the bmum is still in such a dark place but u still care enough to tell ur kids about their bmum

Kim - posted on 07/14/2014

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My boyfriend and I got custody of his son, now 16months old because the mother smoked methamphetamines all through her pregnancy and even the day she went into deliver him. The mother called my boyfriend at 3am and was laughing when she told him that she was losing custody of the bby. My boyfriend was devistated, I held him while he cried and he said he was going to fight for custody. I explained to him that it's a long hard road and was there to support him. To let you all know this mother had 2 previous children that were also taken because they too tested positive for drugs. So, we began our fight for custody 2 months after he was born, all the while she had him with her and was still testing positive for drugs 1 month after he was born. This woman was in Walmart the same time I was, she had the nerve to wait outside the restroom to confront me about my boyfriend. I let her know that under no circumstances did I or will I ever have respect for her and she should not even have the baby with her at that point. This woman said to me that she was just looking out for the best interest of the baby by confronting me, I let her know that if she had been looking out for the babies best interest sd he wouldn't have been doing drugs. My boyfriend and I have had many arguments about this woman, because he feels she deserves a chance. I have explained to him from a mommy's perspective, that after she had the first 2 children and failed, what makes you think she is going to be any different with the 3rd child? This woman failed almost every drug test that she took during the court proceedings, she missed almost every parenting drug class she was to attend and the judge and DHS was still giving her chance after chance. Every time that we would pick the baby up for our visits, he had diaper rashes so bad they were blistered and bleeding. I took pictures of all the diaper rashes, then would get to work on getting them healed before he had to go back, even sending medicine in the diaper bag. Every time we'd pick him up we, had to buy new clothes, more diapers, formula and bottles. This woman never cleaned the bottles and the baby was always getting sick. This woman never bought anything for the baby , my boyfriend and I supplied everything and more, because we finally had to start buying doubles of everything because we never got it back or it was so dirty it wouldn't come clean. In September of 2013, the case worker called my boyfriend up and said when we pick him up for our visit we weren't to return him. We went to every court proceeding, and faught until we received sole custody. Then DHS worker closed their case against this woman, and that is what she had been hoping for that way she doesn't have to do anything and still get to see and have the baby for visits. My boyfriend is so soft hearted he gives in, I let him know that if anything was to happen while she had him that the responsibilty would lie on us for not keeping the baby safe. I also explained to my boyfriend that this woman has never been held accountable for her actions and has never been made to take responsibility for these actions, so she continues to do these things. Again more arguments arrise because, I found texts that he sent saying that they were going to be a family and he'd take care of them. I have a great job, a 15yr old developmentally challenged child, that loves this baby so much, we live in a nice home, and we provide our children with all that they need and more love than any child would ever want before they say "mom,dad quit smothering us", but my boyfriend continues to do for her and give her chances, which makes me so stupid angry.

Dolores - posted on 06/14/2014

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I can some what relate to you Melissa, At first I gave my mother custody, which some how some way ended up they were taken from me???
Anyway gradually yes I did turn to abusing drugs. I did not get custody back but all of us are under the same roof again.
My heart goes out to you I wasn't there for my now 13 year old daughters first step and first word. Let me tell you Mother to Mother it is difficult, Not being their with my 5 kid's. For myself it didn't get easier but I did come to find myself. I would just like to say for me I am all they have and they are all I have when it comes down to it.
After 13 years I was apart from my children ( I am in no way saying or telling you it will take you 13 years to be with your children again) I have found a different side of who I am, as a mother as a daughter and as a female. Hopefully you will find a new side of who you are, like I did.
When I seen your question I felt the need to respond with what I had experienced and what I have come to realization with.

Sammy - posted on 06/14/2014

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My Name is Sarah, From United Kingdom. I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr.Sammy has just done for me,this man has just brought back my lost Ex husband to me with his great spell, I was married to this man called Mr.Kenny we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when I was unable to give him a child for 2 years he left me and told me he can’t continue anymore then I was now looking for ways to get him back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email:(drsammyantispell@gmail.com) then you won’t believe this when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost husband back, and after a month I miss my month and go for a test and the result stated am pregnant am happy today am a mother of a baby girl, thank you once again the great Dr.Sammy for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through any of this problems listed below:

1) If you want your ex back.
(2) if you always have bad dreams.
(3) You want to be promoted in your office.
(4) You want women/men to run after you.
(5) If you want a child.
(6) You want to be rich.
(7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be
yours forever.
(8) If you need financial assistance.
(9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money or properties? or call him +2348162024853
drsammyantispell@gmail.com

Sammy - posted on 06/14/2014

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My Name is Sarah, From United Kingdom. I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr.Sammy has just done for me,this man has just brought back my lost Ex husband to me with his great spell, I was married to this man called Mr.Kenny we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when I was unable to give him a child for 2 years he left me and told me he can’t continue anymore then I was now looking for ways to get him back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email:(drsammyantispell@gmail.com) then you won’t believe this when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost husband back, and after a month I miss my month and go for a test and the result stated am pregnant am happy today am a mother of a baby girl, thank you once again the great Dr.Sammy for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through any of this problems listed below:

1) If you want your ex back.
(2) if you always have bad dreams.
(3) You want to be promoted in your office.
(4) You want women/men to run after you.
(5) If you want a child.
(6) You want to be rich.
(7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be
yours forever.
(8) If you need financial assistance.
(9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money or properties? or call him +2348162024853
drsammyantispell@gmail.com

Wanda - posted on 06/05/2014

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i had to give up complete custodial rights while myself being in drug rehabitilation facility......when i returned being completely clean i wanted my two children back unaware of the fact that my family member had taken complete full custody of my two boys......the unfair part of this matter is that years later he had given me back only one of my children which i thought was unfair to the three of us....i'll never understand whereas now there both grown men not having any kind of relationship at all with each other...being there mother will have that empty piece in my heart that their a cub of mine own self of me without that special bond.....god bless you and hang in there for yourself and your child......

Annabelle - posted on 06/03/2014

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what do you expect, when a child is with relatives for 3 and a half years they are comfortable. you are selfish looking to uproot him. leave him be n ask for supervised visits

Bethany - posted on 05/16/2014

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Sweetheart do not listen to the negativity of others. I have lost my kids because of drug use...everyone has their own reasons for becoming an addict. Those who acknowledge their problem and try to resolve it and truly seek and desire to quit are the ones who deserve a second chance. I was lucky to have great support from my family. Since I became a recovering addict I have worked my ass off to prove that I am no longer that person. After getting my children back home with me I worked a full time job, went to school full time, and was a single parent of 4 children up until last year. I have attained my Associates of Science graduating magna cum laude and attained my Bachelors of Science graduating with a 3.35 GPA. Those who have not experienced your life have no right to judge or condemn you, and if they claim they are religious in anyway then they are just hypocrites and God will judge them accordingly. The only advice I can give you is to follow through with the requirements set out by CPS, stay clean, stay positive, work hard, and remain persistent about contact with your children. If CPS is no longer involved then contact the worker or the department head that was assigned to you when they were and explain the current situations. Hope this helped. Many prayers, much love and God bless!

Jensen - posted on 05/03/2014

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It's ridiculous DCF would prescribe highly addictive and dangerous pills to a pregnant mother, but steal the child from the mother when she chose to inhale marijuana. So sad. Smoking period, is just not healthy for a child due to cellular development, but neither is the synthetic heroin that is given to the mothers... Maybe I am just not that educated, but I feel that synthetics are produced merely because the average person cant make them to make a profit. Unlike marijuana, and opium which can be grown many places by the dullest of us all. No degree for that! So the system requires educated, and indoctrinated people to produce and distribute complicated synthetic drugs so that the franchise can profit. The best way to keep something secret is to encrypt, and that is pretty much what the medical industry has done with the complicated time consuming brain wash that their universities have designed. We are all empty heads till we are full... . . ... So you honestly did nothing worse than eating those damned pain killers in my opinion, though I still disagree with both sides. Honestly, I doubt any harm came to your child though. Best of luck and best of wishes.

Stephanie - posted on 04/18/2014

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you all seam to be so quick to jump on peoples backs that are sick of mothers that keep saying the same old BS.i have been on line most of the day looking up ways to help my grandson who is one of the babies that did not have a say in what his mom did to him,he came in to this world 4 months to soon at 1lb 2oz with fetal alcohol spectrum disorder and methamphetamine weed pills and on and on.he spent 5 months in the hospital when I brought him home he was 3lb.i did bring his mother home at the same time telling me all the time how she just wonted to take care of her babie.2 weeks later she was gone again,honesty not that she did any thing for him when she was here!!I did not know about all the problems that were to come.the crying 24/7 the not sleeping and not eating but when is just cant stay awake any moor then the night mares come,and a hole list of other problems that I just don't have time to list.by the age of 2 anxiety depression had set in.doctors tell me not a lot they can do for him,they just don't know much about this.so they tell me just keep doing what I am doing,i cant get him to eat so he is still very small.by the age of 3 the anger sets in with the behavioral problems,and he is seeing doctors at least 4 times a week.the doctors still don't know how to help him,they just keep telling me to keep up the good work.keep in mind with all this going on I don't sleep or eat myself.all I can think about is him and what can I do to help him.with all this still going on at almost 5 I put him in preschool 6 months later they tell me I have to take him out of school,they just don't have the time or the people to work with him.now the ADHD has set in so the doctors tell me they wont me to put him on pills and send him to talk to some one,i tell them no on the pills but I will take him to see some one.the doctors tell me I should try to get some one to come in to help me with him as I have become sick myself,from not eating or sleeping.but as I was soon to find out me being sick was not all do to this.any way,at almost 6 he starts school but 5 months later I am told I have to take him out,again they just don't have the time or the people to work with him.this is what goes on for the next 8 years,he has spent moor time out of school than in.schools wont take him he has learning disabilies and unprovoked fits of anger.recap my grandson has anxiety,insomnia,paranoia,ADHD,learning disabilities,fits of anger,tremors,behavioral problems,depression,and on and on.you can read up on this and they say this could happen we just don't know,and yes my grandson my just be a bad case but that just does not mean there are not hunders and hunders of other kids out there just as bad as him.as of now the doctors think I should file for social security for him,they told me I have done all I can for him,but he cant even go to school how will he ever be able to hold a job .so I am sorry that I don't have the time for the mothers that are trying to clean up,or the way I see it looking for people to tell them good job,keep on trying.when my grandson at 15 fights every day of his life just to get out of bed,to start a day that he knows will be a battle he will have to fight for the rest of his life!!!! sorry about the spilling I no its bad,been taking care of kids séance I was 14. and one moor thing my daughter should be in jail for what she has done!!!!!!!

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