Mother's Who do not have Residential Custody of their Children

Cheryl - posted on 08/26/2009 ( 46 moms have responded )

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If there is anyone out there who needs help, or advice, please contact me. I have found out that there are alot of Moms who do not have their kids, for whatever reason.......there is alot of help for you out there, contact me anytime!

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Ellie - posted on 06/11/2013

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Last summer I had an episode of severe depression that resulted in a suicide attempt. To avoid any issues with dfys I signed residential custody of my child to my mother. All was fine as i also moved in with her but months later as typical I couldn't be in the same house with her and decided for my overall sanity I needed to be on my own again. However my mother went on a power trip and now refuses to even let me take my child to my new home. I am livid as my time to see my child is now limited to one day a week on my mothers terms yet she insists she's trying to make sure we still maintain a bond. I am no longer comfortable with this situation as it is. She says because of my episode she no longer trusts that i am capable of being alone with her and that i have to prove myself worthy by her standards which mean id never be able to prove it. For school purposes my child needs to live with her grandma but I feel that removing her title as residential guardian will put her back in her place as to who is and has been responsible for making decisions on welfare. All I want is to be able to have my child sleep in my home as we see fit not as my mother determines.

Cheryl - posted on 06/15/2013

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My Daughter is 23 now,well adjusted, hard working, and Loves me as much as she did before her Dad took her for residential custody.I am going to tell you what my parents told me when I lost my court battle, get on with your life,I did, I have a loving Husband, and you are already more than half way there already! your children will hear a lot of bad things, they appear to go along with it, they have no choice, they definitely DO NOT hate you,when they figure it all out and they will, you will have them back focus on your relationship,take care of yourself, because we have our hands tied when we are abused, so rise above it you can and keep them in your heart bonds of mother and child are never broken no matter what.

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Vanessa - posted on 03/14/2014

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I need advice on what to do about my child's paternal grandma who has custody of my 16year old she took her to live in Texas today without telling me and I live in Iowa what can I do?

Vanessa - posted on 03/14/2014

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I lost custody of my child 15 years ago but just recently my 16 year old wants to move back in with me her paternal grandma has custody of her and took her to live with her in Texas I live in Iowa what can I do?

Linn - posted on 02/27/2014

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Its sad that their are so many mothers here without there children. Ive gone 2years without my 3 and I wake up crying and he got physical custody because he had a lawyer and a nice house and I had nothing and because I now have the same thing the courts find it fit that they stay with their father until they are old enough to decide. Ive fought many times only to lose. But my children know Ive fought that I will notgive up and iI believe later on in life they will realize how much I loved them. Not a day goes by that I dont think about them and Ive made it known by calls letters and gifts. I even email their teachers and help my oldest with school projects over the phone. I may not be there physically but I'm still there and I think it really matters. Dont give up hope keep praying and fighting. In the end whether you win or lose your children will know and love you more. My oldest is 12 and when she was here for Christmas she said "I know your doing all you can mom we all know you love us and soon we will be with each other more, I pray for it. I prayed for a sister and I got one so I know this will happen just dont give up" and coming from a 12year old its a huge statement.

Sophie - posted on 02/23/2014

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I have been going through a rough patch I had my daughter at 15 and this year I signed the residence order so her dad could care for her, I wanted her to have stability as I didn't when I was a child. Since her father has been granted residence he has stopped all Contact with my daughter she is 16 months now, and I have not seen her for 4 weeks now, any help or advice would be truly appreciated I'm 17 and can't stand this any longer

Tiffany - posted on 01/12/2014

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I need your help. I lost custidy of my kids to my mom. Then she moved out of state. Now she has brought the kids back to me but we havent went to court so I still have no rights. She has all the rights. Can the state take them from me if they find out the kids are living with me?

Melissa - posted on 12/19/2013

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It seems like we are all in the same boat and honestly who's helping us? No one. My kids were taken and honestly I don't even know why. My mom has them and I haven't seen them in two years. Goin back and forth to court. I have a son in my custody and I still can't get them back. It's like the courts enjoy taking our kids from us. What is this world coming to? How can they take control over another human beings offspring? How? I know I'm a very good mother or else I wouldn't have my son yet I can get girls back or see them due to the restraining order my mom has on me. How can anyone help?

Leah - posted on 11/21/2013

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please help me. i am going insane not having my beautiful babies with me. my name is leah and i lost my virginity to a bastard out of pennsylvania. im from mississippi and moved to pa 3yrs ago with the father of my children. i came from an abusive childhood of polygomy ran away because my dad arranged a marriage for me with an 50yr old man when i was only 19. .ran away into the arms of another emotionally abusive man. something inside told me to leave and to struggle to make it on my own and i was confident that i could with college. but boom... found out i was pregnant. so i decided too stay. moved to pennsylvania to be closer to the dads fam. i felt so alone in a alien state and he lo ved it. his own mom helped me get my first pa job and she also helped me hide ut from her son. it was hard living under the same roof as him aand hhiding a fullyime job. but i was determined get my own apt and raise my babies. and i did but being so desperate to grt from under his abusive thumb i was blind to all of financial obstacles having my own apt paying for my daughters daycare on a mim wage job. held onyo my little one bedroom apt for as long as i could before landlord kicked me iut fir losing my job. thats when i became homeless and felt forced to. let my babies dad take care of my little ones temporairily until i got on my feet. i recently fiund the best job ever and i rent a room in a townhouse so not living iutta my chevy astro anymore. but now the controlling bastard wont even let me see my babies. he is trying to take me to court for childsupport and get full custody of kids. i dont think so! someone please help me. i am sorry abiut all the typos. its 3am right now and am shakinng from pure determination to get my babies back with

Louise - posted on 11/06/2013

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p hav custody of a 10&13yr old...they dont want to listen or do anything but sat&wait 4moma to call...other than that all they want is to eat snaks&do nothin,they make me feel like they are using me till,deadbeat mom can get them...how should i deal with this??dont know why court dont wise up&see her for what she is???

Nikki - posted on 10/21/2013

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Hi, I need help and advice, ive already posted on here, I just want my son back hes my world n my ex is just being sn a**hole even down to limiting the time my 3year old spends with his 4 month old sister (40 mins a week) childrens services are involved and they believe hes bettrr off with hid dad who lives with his parents his bron his lil sis (they are aall at work except his sis) so no1 really spends time with my son, my ex has been on 3 hols this year all with his gf n 1 witn our son which he didnt even go full the fulk time!! My sons was diagnosed with hsp, due to constantly being ill since living with his dad, n his dad banned me from bisiting the hosp n told nurses not to give me info!
His gf haas been introduced to our son despite my concerns of her alcohol consumption (my dad was a violant drunk, one reason my ex was givin custody, but I havent spoke to him since that and havent seen him since a month later) I see my son 3 times a week for 2hours. n its not enough for me, I want custody or atIeast shared? The other reason he was given custody was because I was juggling my son, work and college on my own, and one day social worker came early in the morning (7am) and my home needed tidying a bit, however the worker exaggerated saying it was 'squalid' im worried ill never get him back because social workers reports stand above all else?? Please help!? TIA X

Judy - posted on 09/11/2013

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I am new to this and very frustrated. I left my ex after being married for 16 years due to him hitting me in front of my oldest child 11 at the time. I did not file any charges against him ( big mistake ) I had a bad lawyer that told me to give him temp. custody and get my own place to live, I did that very same day. Turns out she never put in the paper work that it was temp. so it looks like I just gave them away. I was a stay at home mother and my world was my two kids. In that order I was to pay child support and did not know it long story short I went to jail because In did not pay it. My ex has hit my oldest son and his own mother but when I took him to court for an emergency hearing after cps removed them nothing was done the were sent right back to him. Both kids last year miss 24 to 30 days of school, they had doctors notes but never did he send any meds. or did they seem sick to me at all. He was not taking them to their regular doctor just like different walk in clinic. Now this year they have been in school since August 1 and have missed five days all ready. I asked why the did not go to school and they told me because their dad did not get them up. what do I do?

Dawn - posted on 09/09/2013

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Oh I Am one of those mothers who's child was raised by another women. I have tried over the years to have a good relationship with my daughter, yet we live so far away from each other ( 10 hour).

My question is (or I should say any input) She is getting married in oct 2013 and I am missing all the mother duties of a wedding> She is my pride and I am feeling very left out. is this normal? Am i being selfish?

Noemi - posted on 08/06/2013

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And its annoying to know that he doesn't spend anytime with him he is always outside n ma son inside the house with his girl. I hate that he can b home with me if he dont wanna pay attention to him.

Noemi - posted on 08/06/2013

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Wow. I see. Yea karma is deff a bitch. Ma ex owns a bussiness n he ridin around with a bmw n a cr-v ballin. N thru my divirce i lost ma car in repo cuz i was spendin so much on ma lawyer. I basically gave him freedom by givin him his residence to b an american n he makes me look bad to ppl. Makes me look like im nobody. 'Cuz he got 4 days with ma son.' He a piece of shyt man. He says im ungreatfull.

U think by me being married helps?? He has diff girlfriends too n they take ma son a bath, i dnt like that. Right now he steady with one, im hopin he stay with her n stop changing girls.

Cheryl - posted on 08/06/2013

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Because my Fiance' died in a car accident 2 days before we were moving to New York, and I was understandably off the deep end, ex took the opportunity to ask me to sign a temporary res. agreement, then went straight to court and applied for perm. he was paying 2300 a month in child support, didn't want to pay I spent 35000,00 fighting him, finally gave up moved by my parents bought a house, and got on with my life, started fighting him on my own for every right that I was owed, and in the end guess what mr big stuff 16 years later lost his business and him his wife are each facing 15 years in prison for numerous federal tax charges, I feel sorry for their two sons, and my daughter who is 23 and lives in west palm beach near him, Karma what a Bitch! I am married for 12 years to the best guy in the world, my daughter still loves me, and I am happy, so who won? Certainly not him!

Noemi - posted on 08/05/2013

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I have one question. If u dnt mind me askin. How/why did u loose the residential custudy of ur daughter

Noemi - posted on 08/05/2013

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Ok thank u. I hope everything goes in my favor after iget married n have my day job

Cheryl - posted on 08/05/2013

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You will have no problem getting your son, you are what is best for him, and are trying to give him a family environment, I will email you tomorrow with the resources that are available to you, we all are allowed to get mad, we are Human, and Jersey girls, I was raised in Elizabeth, and will never be a Florida girl, but have to stay here to be close to my Daughter, and parents!

Noemi - posted on 08/05/2013

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I don't bother him or anything. Buh im angry today because he made me look bad and was sayin that ma son will always live with him. And that he won the case. And i got loud telling him what a lier he is. So im guessing im only going to see my son in my 3 days for now.
I live in Newark NJ.
I didnt want to start this situation againg but i know for a fact that my son is better with me during the week for school. He is in preschool and they started to give homework with pictures. Right b4 the summer his father would pick him up from school n hand me his homework and pick him up at 8pm after work on his days.
I have my bachelor degree so I can b a teacher and i think im going to do that. Its only day time.
I wish he wasnt so hard headed. He told me today that he has a consultant for any desisions with our son. Because i asked him if in the summer time we can switch every week. He wants to b in control all the time. Its notgonna hurt beither one of us it willb better that way. Buh watever. Idk. But at the same time i want him on some weekens so that we can allgo out me my fiance and his 3 boys. But theres always an issue. I like when the 4 boys areall together instead my sin alone in the summer time

Cheryl - posted on 08/05/2013

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No Judgement is final,you can always file A Motion to Modify Residential Custody, put your baby first, don't listen to your ex husband he sounds like my ex husband, and after I got away from him I fought him, and his lies. We shared custody but he had residential, and took that ball and ran with it told everybody I was a drug addict, a mental case, and unstable, he thought he had sole custody, and I found out I had more rights as a non custodial parent, your baby will be starting school in one to two years, and you want to have a stable structured environment (extremely important) you don't need a Lawyer, and your state should have forms available or local courthouse online, that is what I did, you speak better for yourself than a Lawyer can, because Judges want what is best for the child, Lawyers give free consults I went to one, and wrote down what he said HE would do for 5000 and did it myself! You have to put up with your Ex, he will have visitation, and make sure he does not violate your rights to see your baby until you get this thing going. stay strong you will be surprised what you can do, stay calm and focused no matter what no fighting, or anything else, he will use it against you the father of your baby is NOT your friend, he just wants to hurt you. What state do you live in, I will see what resources I can find for you to get help. Keep your head up, you CAN do this!

Noemi - posted on 08/05/2013

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My ex husband lives behind his business in the old apt we were living in when we were married. And has a door right from the bussiness. Its an illegal apt and only one window and one exit. And he is never with our son he is always outside chillen and workin and our son inside with his girlfriend. He use to let me stay with ma son till he get off work but sinse his girl there he leaves him with her n he stays outside.

I gave him residential custody in our last case because i wasnt stabled financially yet. He took me to court after he had his residense to b a citizin for the USA and put a restrainimg order against me for physical abuse. He lost that case because he was lying. Then he put an emergency custody case and took my son. N i only saw him supervised by the babysitter. He had said i was on drugs n left my son everywhere to go party (not true). I got tested n he had no proff. I won that case. I was runimg out of money to keep fighting for half of his money so i let him keep that but not my son. Then we set a schedule and he was trying to give me a hard time because he wanted me to only have him 2 days. He said i abandoned my son (not true) after a year of battle we sat down n i fell for his lyes again and he said "i will pay the rest of what u owe ur layer n just let me have primary custody, n u will see how im not the person u think i am. I can b ur friend n help u financially" i believe him and let him have it. We were fine n i had my son everyday n 3 nights and now its all diffrent for the past 3 weeks. Everytime he gets mad at me he wont bring me my son on his days like he use to. We live a few blocks away. And i also work a few blocks away.
My son is now 3 goin on 4 in december. And hes been with his dad for 2 years total. Only 4 nights. Our divorce ended last year. The only diffrence is that my son is with me monday tuesday and thursday. Im trying to work with his dad in the schedule because i work nights too sometimes. But he is giving me a hard time because he feels like he is in control of everything. We both have legal custody.
Im getting married in september 21 2013 and i believe my son is better off living with me once i get a day only job, and school starts. His father doesnt have patients to sit there and help him learn. 1 because he has a very bad accent and always talkin spanish. 2 because he doesnt pay attention to him at all. So one more day in the week (wednesday) shouldnt b a problem. But he makes it seem like its a competition n tells ppl he won the case.

What can i do to get primary custody?
I have no money for a laywer. But he always has a laywer.

Brandy Renae - posted on 07/20/2013

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no your not a bad mom. I was in a similar situation. I know God has control of everything and its his will not anyone elses. I left my abusive ex and lost everything due to staying in the relationship and dr put me on some meds that made me get a dui and wanton endangerment and lost my kids its been 9 yrs and still trying to get my kids. but he judge and social workers are against me and I am happily married and have a stepson I hate not having my kids but I wouldn't go back cause I know one day I will have my kids and then my life will be complete. you staying just for your kids sake and if something worse could have happened to you and you being unhappy would not have been better. I kmow it will work out for you and me in GODS time. faith trust. Ill pray for you

Vicki - posted on 07/06/2013

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Hello, I haven't seen my son in 2 1/2 years. He is now 6. I understand the pain and grief. I am not yet strong enough to do the court battle and don't have enough money yet. Good luck in your battle. Keep in touch.

Ruth - posted on 06/08/2013

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Hello my name is Ruth I'm 32 my problem is that ever since I was joung I was in a abusive home alchohol, drugs, beating constant arguments, got kicked out a few times and my bro and sis got married at 15my father forsed me to marry at 17 after I got pregnant but not with the father of my child since he was rasist.. my ex husband hurt my son after we got married and hurt me so my parents took custody of my son I was heart broken to have lost my son, ay least that's what they told me.. reality was they had lied for years manipulated me and make me feel bad all my life.. I lost my son thanks to my parents and stupid me for letting them, still till this day they show no love, make me feel guilty and put my son against me and all my family.. then lost my daughter to an abusive ex that said he would bring her back and never did once I went to go get her cops said it was to laye. I got in depression and feel like such a looser mother.. I love them to death but I sometimes wonder why me lord I'm a good person.. my parents hate me, my son hates me because my parents made them belive his father didn't want him when that was a lie he always wanted him.. soon as my son wanted to live with me they moved to pr, soon as my daughter wanted to be with me his dad said he would take her to Honduras and I would never see her again.. I have a good man now, really suportive he sees all of the abuse and told me that I had to put my foot down that enough is enough.. my sister and I were molested by our father. I'm traumatized and have not yet heard I'm sorry I love u none of that, I feel hated.. I don't want my kids to hate me to.. that's just the start of my miserable story if I keep writing ill write a book.. please help

Promise - posted on 05/21/2013

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I hav eno clue how I found this but I would love to find more support in my area. I am in central Fl. It has been a very hard road. After 12 years of marriage, ex found a flirt who he later married and she is a very smart woman. Of course,since he makes over 9k a moth, she was not going to jeopardize any "mula". Savvy got a hold of my older children and turned them completely against me. As of today, 05212013, it has been 3 yrs I have not seen my child. Just began court battle on my own and every help will be greatly appreciated. I hope to find a group in the area. I knowthat I do not have any strength but God is the One that Hold me still.

Tina T - posted on 05/05/2013

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My children's dad has custody of them but he is using drugs, how do I go about getting custody?
Two of my children live with their dad in Wyoming & he has legal custody of them. I live in Oklahoma now but I have just learned that their dad lost his job because he wrecked his work truck & since he damaged their property he was told to go to the hospital and give a URIN TEST (U.A) from what I was told the boss gave him 2 hours to get to the local hospital to do the test. I was told that he just never showed up at the hospital to do the test and this has been a few days ago.

He does have a previous history of drug use and even previous charges.I understand the law pretty well for the most part & from what I understand, him NOT going to the hospital and giving them a UA like his employer instructed him to would be him refusing to take a drug test since he was instructed to do so by his employer, Right? Not only that but most would see it as an admition of guilt because if he had nothing to hide he would have been there & did the UA with no problems, Right?

I am so far away from them now that I live in Oklahoma & I know that since he is using again MY CHILDREN ARE IN DANGER & I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! I know how their dad is when he is using, I have seen him lock himself in the bathroom for 4 or 5 hours after getting high,It was nearley impossable to get him to come out and when he gets high he uses a needle & he has left it laying around before! My children are only 5 and almost 3 they wont really know not to touch it! PLEASE HELP ME...TINA

Ebony - posted on 04/22/2013

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my brothers and sisters are in cps custody, they are currently staying with family members i have my little sister i have questions about the whole thing. first they told my mom as soon as she finish her classes and drug test she would be able to get the kids back, my mom was staying in a motel at first then she got an apartment the case worker then told her she had done everything she was pose to do all she needed was one more drug test and if she passed she would get the kids back, so when time came to take her last test they called and said we had another case worker so we had to wait a whole month for her to take her last drug test so now that we have case worker number 3 she said she dosent know whats gonna happen now because my 14yr old brother was picked up with alcohol in his system when he was at a friend house now their trying to put it as my mom gave him alcohol when he wasn't even with her he was spending the night at a friend house, so they put my brother in a shelter and he ran away from cps twice now they cant find him. i really need to know what can i tell my mom she can do to get her kids back because everything is just messed up right now. it is a 8yr,10yr, and 14yr old. she is now staying back in a hotel but she has a job and is a great parent can she get them back while staying in a hotel and they put the whole alcohol situation on my mom even though he was even with her at the time ,she is currently looking for an apartment right now

Linn - posted on 04/09/2013

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Could use help! I have alot of children. 4 of my own and 3 step children. I was in an abusive relationship with my ex husband whom I have 3 children with. We divorced and he took everything and I was homeless and had no choice but to give him custody of the children. I got a house, got joint custody, went to college, got re-married and had a baby girl. My current husband is from arizona and his children were there. He was without them for 4 years and they were out of control. Living with there grandmother, hardly ever seeing there mother whos on drugs. My husband and I decided we should move to arizona from california because his family has property here for us to live on rent free, he could see his kids and had a job here. Hardest thing I ever had to do was say goodbye to my 3 children. I wanted to take them with me but we unable since they are from california. I've been gone for a year and they spend summer with me and I've been down 3 times to visit them. my ex husband says i abonded my 3 children to start a new life and always tries to make me feel guilty about moving but its been the best thing i could of done. I have had to go to court 2 times since I moved becaue my ex husband refused to let me talk to my kids, he was ripping up letter to them from me, and last time I went down he wouldnt let me see them at all. When I did live in california my ex husband knew everything I was doing and knew everywhere I went, I have no idea how. He knew he couldnt physically abuse me so verbal abuse and stocking had started. Now when he says mean things I can just hang up the phone and not worry about him knocking on me door. I really miss my children and think about them all the time. I cry everyday and even had to be put on anit depressents because of it. I am sad that they are growing up without me, they aren't around to bond with there half sister and dont really know there step siblings. I miss out on events at school and miss sport games. I feel I miss out on EVERYTHING. My step kids are great and they are here 4 times a week and always cheer me up. Since we have moved here their grade and behavior has improved and they are generally more happy. I hope one day one of my kids will move here to live with me. I pray everynight for there safety and well being. I love my 1 year old daughter. She is adorable and funny , she does cry alot but i love her. I just feel incomplete without all my children here with me. I dont really want to do anything. I sit at home all day with my 1 year. I clean my house and watch T.V. and think about my other 3 kids. I miss them so much. I did the right thing 4 years ago by leaving an abusive man and yet he got everything and i was left with nothing. California court system sucks. Am I a bad mom for trying to start over somewhere else? Am i a bad mom for leaving? Am I just a bad mom?

Natalie - posted on 02/14/2013

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my name is natalie garcia i live in tempe i lost my rights to my kids cps and now i am alone at first my reaction was i wanted to die i used meth so much to the point i was no longer able to work now i am sober no job i recently got sick with heart spasms and doctor told me whatever is going on in your life that bis causing you stress needs to stop as ilayed there alone i cried and toldgod whatever idid in life that was so bad i am sorry i miss my boys its so true you dont no what you got until its gonei scream to myself just to go to bed made bad choices that caused the removal of my kids in 2010 cps served me with a court order to take kids away which i fled to california with the kids and there we were with no home food money so i asked strangers if they could help me out i would lie and make up a story that i left my abusive husband for 3 years this went on we had bad and good days i would put my kids to sleep and leave to find food things i have done went through were horible my son was molested so hard on the children but all i had was on my mind was not letting the police stop and take them i was in hell now all that is behind me and finally accepted my kids are doing good have a stable home go to school and have a beautiful mother named stacy she truly loves my kids i didnt no good people do exist so now i want my life to be drugfree i want to get a job i have very littleclothes food i currently stay with a friend vfrom my job but its only a matter of time befor they need rent so if there is anyone who has extra clothes shoes or even hygene or i am willing to clean houses yards anything i told god if i try and sucseed to allow me oe day to see my kids again thank you very much my name is natalie my phone mumber is 480 228 9405

Maria - posted on 01/27/2013

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Hi..im new here. My daughter 13 & my son 10 live with their dad after he got resid. custody 4 yrs ago. There was a picture taken of my son with fingers marks on his upper rm & dad said it was me (mom) my son @ that time was asked many times to repeat hs story as to what happen, he kept asking his dad "you tell them". Records of ACS worker & social workers show that dad was "leading the kids into what to say". After 3 yrs of fighting in court he won. i see my kids every weekend, but lately he doesnt bring me the kids as he suppose & my son has been coming to me with bruises on his arm just like the ones that i was accused of (yes i got pics). Now dad has an open ACS case because he hits the kids (no i didnt call them). Kids are also doing poorly in school. I have to mention that i have a 16 yrs old son who was also given to him but my son ran away from dad 4 yrs ago because he was getting hit by him. so he now just has my 2 youngest kids with him. i want to go back to court & fight for my kids which i am going to do. But i live with a friend cause my husband lost his job. were looking to move in the nxt mth or so. Can anyone give me adice on how i can win bak my kids. I dont work i go to school, & my husband works nights.

Darlene - posted on 12/16/2012

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I am new here too. I became homeless last year due to losing my job and my home. I was evicted and moved to Mesa with my 2 daughters. We stayed in hotels living off of my income tax. My youngest daughters father got wind that I was homeless and threatened to take custody of our daughter. He told me that he was going to only take her till I was able to get stable and have a job and get a place. I was wanting the best for our daughter and if she didnt have to be going thru the homeless trauma I didnt wanna expose her to that. I didnt have that option for my other daughter since they have different dads. He also claimed that he wanted to get it court documented incase I tried to say he kidnapped her. I was like, fair enough, so we went to his lawyers to draw up the paperwork and my daughter went to live with him in texas while my other daughter and I went into a shelter. This was in February and I was able to get a very stable job in July since jobs are so scarce in AZ. I am in the process of getting into a place of my own and now my daughters father will not give me our daughter back after agreeing he would once I was stable. He now is wanting to take full custody and charge me child support. My question is, what can I do to get my daughter back now that I have a job and will be moving into a new place?

YOLA - posted on 11/13/2012

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IM NEW HERE AND I NEED HELP, I HAVE A SON WHO WILL BE 6YRS NEXT WEEK HE IS IN A FOSTER HOME MY ADULT DAUGHTER HAD GUARDIANSHIP OVER HIM DUE TO MY DRUG ADDICTION IVE COMPLIED WITH CPS TO GAIN CUSTODY. SINCE HE WAS STILL IN MY DAUGHTER CARE SHE LOST HIM DUE TO HAVING MARIJUANNA HOW CAN I TRY TO GET HIM BACK IN MY CUSTODY. CAN ANY ONE PLS. HELP AND GIVE ME SOME POSITIVE ADVISE IM AT MY WITS END

Desiree - posted on 08/25/2012

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I have 3 boys one of which lives with his father he took me to court and at the time i was in an abusive relationship so he won custody now 3 years later my little boy is out of control he tells me no and wont listen i went to put him in time out and he wouldnt stay so i put him on my lap he then smacked and kicked me when i tried getting him to put his shirt on i got kicked in the jaw i want custody back so i can try and help him his dad refuses to do anything his dad told him i abandonded him and i did not and encourages him. I NEED HELP i dont have a lot of money especially raising two other boys and only being a server.

Cheryl - posted on 06/29/2012

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P.S.No Judgement is final find out how long you have to file a Modification to last custody motion,all states are different,let me know.

Cheryl - posted on 06/29/2012

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You are being abused,reach out to the people you know for help therapy wise to keep you strong.DO NOT JEOPARDIZE YOUR JOB!What you do for a living is a major plus for you, not to mention the job you have is so IMPORTANT to others, and allows you some resources for the help you need talk to someone in your work circle that can guide you in the right direction to keep you strong!Get a notebook,and start documenting everything that happens in your life EVERYDAY,I will tell you in my work I always told my trainees, if you don't document,it never happened!your journal should not be shown to anyone,and by documenting everything that goes on will help you later.I am here for you too!

Cheryl - posted on 06/29/2012

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First,you are in my prayers.Your daughter like mine is going through alot.She did not mean that quote for you,at her age everything is a big thing.She knows you love her, and because she does,deep down she wishes she could help you. You did not let her down,you are sick, and starting with taking care of you first,will get you back to her.Lets find a way to get you some medical help,once you are feeling physically better,everything else will fall in to place.

Jennifer - posted on 06/27/2012

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I need help. I asked my one yr. old son's father to help me last year when I had lost my job. so he took care of him financially for a while. two weeks after i gain employment i receive papers that he is taking me to court for full custody. he didn't win that but he used the situation against me and won primary and child support. he is trying now to file charges on me for negligence because my son got into peanut butter crackers in the hospital emergency room while we were there because his little finger got caught in a door. he is saying that i don't see my son and that is not true!!!! I work at an abused women's shelter and my hours are sometimes erratic so I always call and work out other arrangements. he is only "documenting" what he wants to, not what is really happening. I am scared I am going to lose my son as well as my job because of these accusations. What do I do????

LORRIE - posted on 06/12/2012

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I am in a desperate situation and dont know what to do...I live in Washington state,6 yrs ago my husband of 16 years left me (without notice,warning,fighting,etc.via a phone call on his lunch hour and he hasn't spoken to me since). Before we were married I was a Registered Nurse who earned a good living but we agreed I would stay home to raise our children (2 boys of his "I" raised,2 of my own, and one girl we had together) I was to return to nursing when our daughter was 3 (one year before he left me) I did not keep up my nursing license and can not return to nursing without returning to school which I am unable to do since I can not afford it. Bottom line, He made a nice income and supported us,when he left he left me without a dime. I am older (54 now) and can not find a job to support myself. He lied to judges,manipulated the courts,went against a family court judges orders and went to another judge to divorce me with out my knowledge (this judge granted him the divorce and everything "HE" wanted including full custody of our daughter. This judge was unaware another judge had ordered against this). This lead to my son and I being homeless, living on the streets with no money,no car,etc) I did have a job that paid minimum wage for 3 years until I was injured on the job and unable to return to the only job I was able to find to support myself. In that time I was working and had an apartment my exe finally allowed me to have weekend visits with my daughter and we rebuilt a close bond........................She is my youngest child and is 14 years old now. Since my injury on the job, I once again lost my home and am now living at a friends home in another city.............................When I lost my daughter I felt like a death had taken place, My heart and soul died that day in the court house and has never returned. I have survived since then, but not lived, I feel like the living dead! ....................Since the injury, I once again lost of my home and everything I owned. It has been one year now and I have only been able to see my daughter 5 times since then. I have zero income, do not have medical insurance in order to see a docter and get the medication I need to function without crying. The depression and panic attacks have now become so severe I am unable to leave the home I am in now, have isolated myself and am unable to even make a phone call. I have no financial support, I clean the house where I live and work inside the house in exchange for my rent, but have no money at all for anything else. I need help badly and have no one for support, have no family members, no one at all I can turn to for emotional support,etc. My family and my children were my entire world, I feel lost without them and I still feel hurts beyond belief, I cant seem to recover..................................................NOW THE PROBLEM WITH MY DAUGHTER AND I NEED ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO BEFORE I LOSE HER FOREVER! She's 14 now, living with her father and 2 brothers, she feels alone,they do not understand her, she has never been able to confide in her dad like she did with me because he would yell,curse,and threaten her if she cried or was upset so she learned to "Act fine around him, When she is really hurting and sad". (This comes from "her", not me) I was the one she could tell anything too. She needs me now more than ever. I have become so isolated in my grief,loss,heart break,depression,loss of home, loss of being able to support myself, etc that I have not been there for her. The only way I can communicate with her is via Facebook messages since I have no phone of my own to use. ....................Now, my daughter has stopped communications with me, she will not return messages, I've had the friend I live with call her and leave her messages saying I want to talk to her and to please call this number back~No response back. I have left her messages on face book which was how we were able to communicate and begged her to please talk to me, what ever the problem is I want to help, I love her, I miss her, etc. I've said everything I know to say, and nothing! No response back.....Yesterday I see something she posted to Facebook which said " The people who want to be in your life will find a way, They will make every effort without excuses, or lies or broken promises"~Im not sure, but am almost positive this was meant for "ME" since she normally never post sayings, etc. I feel worthless, useless, am more heart broken than ever before at the thought of my baby girl thinking I have made excuses,lied, or broke promises to her..........................IT IS MY FAULT, I AM THE PARENT, I HAVE THE DEPRESSION AND PANIC ATTACKS, I AM THE ONE UNABLE TO RECOVER IN LIFE THIS TIME....SHE IS JUST A CHILD WHO IS CONFUSED AND HURTING AND WHO NEEDS HER MOTHER......................PLEASE HELP, ANY ADVICE AS TO WHAT TO DO IS APPRECIATED AS I HAVE NO ONE ELSE IN THIS WORLD TO TURN TO, NO ONE ELSE TO ASK....The pain in unbearable now! Thank you so much, LorrieL417

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