Jami - posted on 12/28/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )
We lost our 2 year old son on October 23 shortly after he was diagnosed with Leukemia. The pain is undescrible, but I truely believe he is in a better place and is no longer suffering from the horrible pain he was in and all of the chemo and procedures that he just didn't understand why he had to go through. We have another son who is 4 and the two of them were best friends. My heart hurts so much for him, he just doesn't understand and is so lonely. We never wanted an only child. My sisters and I are my best friends and am so saddened that he has lost that. I had my ovaries removed last January due to cysts so I cannot have anymore. We have considered adoption but know that it can be a very lengthy process and know it can take years. Just today I have started to consider IVF. I still have my uterus and both of my sisters have generously offered to give me an egg. Jamison could never ever be replaced, but our house feels so empty without him and I know he would want his bubbas to have another brother or sister. I know there are so many children out there who need a home, but I don't want Ty to have to wait until he is 10 to have another brother and sister. Am I being selfish wanting to carry another baby, should I be content with having an only child, is it too early for me even thinking about another child since it's only been 2 months and I am still grieving for him every moment of every day. I am almost 33 and am not getting any younger. I feel robbed of all my hopes and dreams for my lost child and my family.