44 and want another baby

Donna - posted on 04/02/2012 ( 24 moms have responded )

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Im a 44 yrold and wanting to have another baby, my daughter is 18..

I have been with my partner, for 5yrs who is 10yrs younger than me... As he has no children, we thought we would give it ago.

But alas after trying for 2yrs , doing everything by the book , no baby.. Any ideas anyone xx

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Michele - posted on 04/18/2012

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Check out the Center for Human Reproduction and their work with older women. Make an appt and talk to Dr. Gleicher. There are published peer reviewed studies claiming that the methods they use reduce miscarriage and aneuploidy and increase take home baby rates. Not only in younger women but in women over 40. In fact, the results are not as positive in younger women as older. Don't delay and think about this for a couple of months. Time is not on your side--call tomorrow. I'm in the same boat.

Michele - posted on 04/20/2012

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Google. (-: Ask for an appt with Dr. Gleicher. Cost is $450 for first visit unless covered by insurance. He will do a phone consult if you are outside of NYC. Also, they will coordinate treatment locally for you.

Megan - posted on 04/11/2012

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Hello I'm a mother of three (21, 16 & 14) and at 44 just welcomed a brand new little one to our family - so I know it can be done. My husband and I went to a local fertility clinic and had all the tests before starting IUI treatments (tests were normal for both of us) and using ovulation test kits every month. In 2.5 yrs we had four cycles of IUI (only one took and I miscarried at 9 wks) and became pregnant two other times without help (both resulting in miscarriages). We conceived naturally after deciding to take a break from fertility treatments and the pregnancy was relatively good - I was just really tired. Lots of ultrasounds and checkups due to my age though. Older moms do need to be aware that the risks in pregnancy are higher for them - chance of Downs is 1 in 30, much higher risk for premature/low birth weight babies, hypertension and diabetes as well. But as I sit and hold my perfect 3 week old baby I know the risks were all worth taking.

Good luck and God bless.

Louise - posted on 04/02/2012

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Go and see your GP and see if they can run some tests on both you and your partner. At 44 you may not actually release an egg each month and on the occasion you do you could release 2-3 at a time. Your partner has not fathered any children so he may be the cause. So first stop is to see if there is any reason for this not happening. Once given the all clear on both sides then you need to make sure you have sex every three days from the end of your period to the next due period date. You should not have sex more often than this as the quality of sperm produced is poor.



Try placing a pillow under your bottom tilting your pelvis backwards to help the sperm swim faster and stay led down for at least half an hour after sex.



At 44 you really should make sure you are aware of all the pitfalls of being pregnant as an older mum. The risk of downs is a lot higher and the risk of miscarriage is too. Also high blood pressure and diabetes is very high. Saying that, I am sure you are aware what you are letting yourself in for. Try to relax and if it is meant to be it will happen.

Christine - posted on 04/20/2012

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Read taking charge of your fertility. Of course there is always this recipe: http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blo... They say that is the magic make a baby pasta! I'm 43 and wouldn't mind having another. Some people are incredibly discouraging and others very helpful. Surround your self with positive people and quit caffeine and drinking if you can while trying.

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Sheila - posted on 05/17/2012

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Wow this is something that my husband and I have been talking about we are both 44 and while I have four children with the youngest being 17 he doesn't have any and well like I said we are talking about it. I kind of want one just because he doesn't have any and well on the other hand I don't reason being I have two grandchildren. There are thoughts in the back of my mind that if I do get pregnant and have another child it's going to mess up the cycle of life for my family. So I don't know if we will just give up on these thoughts or if we will move forward with the process to conceive.

Sheila - posted on 05/17/2012

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Wow this is something that my husband and I have been talking about we are both 44 and while I have four children with the youngest being 17 he doesn't have any and well like I said we are talking about it. I kind of want one just because he doesn't have any and well on the other hand I don't reason being I have two grandchildren. There are thoughts in the back of my mind that if I do get pregnant and have another child it's going to mess up the cycle of life for my family. So I don't know if we will just give up on these thoughts or if we will move forward with the process to conceive.

Deb - posted on 05/08/2012

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I say don't give up. You'r not too old and if, in your heart you want to be a mother, I say don't stop trying. My mother was 46 years old when she gave birth to twins with a 14 month old along with me, 2 years old at the time. My mother didn't go through menopause until she was 52. Some times we may need a little help if we want the little bundle to arrive soon. I say do a google search for Center for human reproduction. I've heard good things about it, with positive results for older women.

Melissa - posted on 04/28/2012

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I'm 44 with an 11month old, I say go for it! I also have a 16 year old daughter and she has been a huge help. There are some risks but many many women our age are still having healthy children.

User - posted on 04/28/2012

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I say go for it!
I got pregnant when I was 43 and will be 44 when she is due. She was unexpected, but so far things have been terrific through out this pregnancy.
I have to admit, I had a really hard time when I found out! My sons are 18 and 21, so this was a complete shocker, but my husband and I have no children together, so I guess this is out chance!
If you and your partner are on the same page and healthy, I say do it!

Kelly - posted on 04/18/2012

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I have a blog that explains how my snowflakes twins came to be.

WWW.markandkelly-snowflakes.blogspot.com

Kelly - posted on 04/18/2012

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We adopted embryos "snowflakes". through Nightlight Christian Adoptions. The procedure is called s frozen embryo transfer. My snowflakes are almost 4 years old and a huge blessing in my life.

Eileen - posted on 04/17/2012

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I had my last child when I was 45. We did not think I could have another. We had tried fertility and I had a failed pregnancy at 5.5 month. Along came my daughter and she is beautiful. She is now 11 ( starting with a little attitude) and sometimes I say I am too old for this but really not. Sometimes people say how could you and I say God sent her to the right house because we cherish her. She is an aunt now - my older daughter has an 8 year old and my son just had twins. I laugh to my son and tell him it took 20 years for me to get over him:) Try fertility and either way you are blessed to have each other:)

Michelle - posted on 04/17/2012

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Im 43 and I would like to hav another child, I already hav five and would love one more( or twins) if my body allows! For some reason I cannot concieve and I was always fertile, I know my age plays a part but im very concern! What do I do? My husband is younger than I and I would love to just have one more, my husband wouldnt mind either! What do we do? Mind you we been tryn for three years.

Deb - posted on 04/17/2012

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Kelly, how does the embryo adoption work. Is it way different than IVF and egg donors?

Kelly - posted on 04/17/2012

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I have birth to twins at age 44 . My babies were concieved through embryo adoption. If you truely desire to have a child, there us a way to make that dream come true. I saw a reproductive endocrinologist who did testing and found I was not ovulating. Find out what your options are.

Donna - posted on 04/15/2012

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I would see what your Dr says. Have you tried laying with a pillow under you for 20 minutes or so after sex. Don't forget your eggs are 44 years old. It just might not be meant to be. What does he think about adoption.

Gaela - posted on 04/12/2012

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Donna, there is a higher incidence of Down's Syndrome as we age, you're correct in that. But do the research and find out exactly how much this risk increases. Being older does not automatically mean you will have a baby with problems. Out of all the births I have been a part of, only one had a baby with a genetic problem and mom was under 30.

Donna - posted on 04/12/2012

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Thanku to u all for your thoughts....... I do know that there is a lot of risk with being older, but as I said my partner has no children , and yes at this stage in my life and a daughter who is 18 I really should be living my life now ha ha ...... But we are going to still give it a go and go to the doctors..as we live in Spain it's not as easy , so have to go private with certain things.....

Hopefully will be able to say in time i"m pregnant,,,,, but who knows time will tell , again Thanku xxx

Gaela - posted on 04/08/2012

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I just want to give you a word of encouragement. I'm a nurse and a labor doula. I have had many moms who are having FIRST babies at your age. Natural (normal) birth and all. It may take you a little longer to get pregnant, but after two years of trying, I would definitely go (not to GP) to your OB/Gyn Doctor who may refer you to a fertility specialist. They can check both you and your partner for any type of fertility problems. Checking your partner is pretty simple and quick. Checking you may be a little more involved. I just suggest that you educate yourself on procedures and alternatives. Good luck and I hope we're hearing soon that you're looking for a doula of your own.

Julie - posted on 04/08/2012

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Hi and hate to be a stick in the mud, but are you aware of the birth defects your child could have because of your age? I would look into it if I were you. Sorry, just being really honest with you.

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