ADHD

Laura - posted on 04/20/2010 ( 56 moms have responded )

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I am new here. I am 53 and have 2 grown children but 2 of my grandchildren live with me. The 8 year old has ADHD and has been on medication for 4 years. I did not want this to be the case but it has made such a difference in his behavior. He is very smart and has no problems at all in school. I don't know what I would have done without it. I would never recommend this as a blanket solution for every child. It is a personal decision that needs to be made with the help of doctors and school educators.

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Darla - posted on 05/01/2010

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It's very common for meds. to become less effective over the yrs. This is more evident during growth spurts & teenage yrs. with all the changes in their bodies they are going through. COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR PRESCRIBING Dr!!!! They can't help you if they don't know the whole story, what's going on. Even if it's something small, tell your Dr. Don't just quit taking meds. or increase dosages on your own. Nowadays there are so many meds. out there for various needs. Don't give up if 1 doesn't work, let your Dr. know so adjustments can be made. There's no 1 Size Fits All, Magic Cure for everyone. Don't expect or assume that your PCP Primary Care Physician knows everything about meds. for children's mental health needs. They are only human-they can't be all knowing. I highly recommend when starting a child on meds to see a child psychiatrist for their expertise. Once your child is stable on meds. your family Dr. can monitor meds. ASK QUESTIONS, PROVIDE INFO. TO YOUR DR. IT TAKES A TEAM EFFORT TO HELP YOUR CHILD.

Darla - posted on 05/01/2010

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FYI, those of you raising kids that have been diagnosed with ADHD and nedd some additional supports/services. Your local community mental health center can offer "wraparound" services. It can be on a sliding scale. Don't let $$ hinder you from getting help. Not sure about other states--in Kansas they have SED (Severly Emotionally Disturbed) Waivers. Do NOT let the title/label scare you. Simply means kids that have emotional, mental health issues that need some extra help to reach their full potential. In Ks. the local MHC does an intake to determine if the child qualifies for SED waiver. If so the child will get a Medical Card which pays for all mental health services, & also physical health needs. Great for families/kids that fall between the cracks. With the Waiver the child can get a Case Manager, Attendant Care Worker, be involved in Psychosocial Groups, indiv., family therapy, even In-Home Family Therapy, medication management-child seen by a psychiatrist, respite care to give the caregiver a break, and Parent Support Specialist-a parent with a SED child that can relate to your struggles- it's finally someone there for YOU. All of this is FREE of charge.
Also there's a growing # of grandparents, aunts/uncles, even Great Grandparents raising children nowadays. YOU are NOT alone!! Many communities have Grandparents Helping Grandparents Support Groups so you don't feel so isolated. Chance to get ideas from each other, normalize what you're going through, etc. I've been an In-Home Family Therapist with SED kids for 20 yrs. Don't give up--there is help and hope out there. Keep advocating for your child!!

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Debbie - posted on 09/12/2013

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I also am a grandma and know what it's like to have children around again. I have had experience with a child with ADHD. We did not medicate, but we did try to cut back on all sugars, additives and food coloring especially reds and yellows in kool-aide and nachos and the like. This helped dramatically. We also used fructose instead of sugar. It's a natural fruit sugar, can be used by diabetics also. It stops the pancreas from producing insulin which creates the hyperactivity. I also found a simple and extremely successful program that helps the child focus on the activity at hand and listen better. It is called the happy face token system written about in a book called From Combat Zone to Love at Home. Within two weeks I had a different child. Yes, we still had some issues, but I was able to better cope and amazingly this program states that it is made for mom's happiness with a built in consistency factor. It is and does! This program allows you to encourage children to choose an apple instead of candy and because of the reward list, they will do things you could never get them to do before. We are using it with grandchildren now and everyone is happier.

Shelia - posted on 05/11/2010

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our kids go to bridgeport schools and the staff and teachers there go out of their way to help with the kids problems, could not ask for a better school and staff, it helps when they are behind you all the way. A big thank you to them all

Shelia - posted on 05/11/2010

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what kind of meds. did they put him on ? both of my grandchildren have this disorder, plus reattachment disorder, we have full cust. of them they are 7 yr old twins double the trouble. everyday is a war zone here.

Scarlett - posted on 05/09/2010

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thank you very much. After reading the posts here I plan on finding out if we have a support group in my area. Only problem is I live in a rural area that does not have what many other areas do. I will give it a shot though. We want to do everything we can to help her live as normal a life as possible and to helpfully grow up to be a good healthy person.

Sue - posted on 05/09/2010

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My oldest has adhd. I never gave him meds, Finegold diet, behavior modifcation, drawing therapy, anger management, coffee .. It takes a lot of work but it was worth it ... He is 26 and I survived it... some children do need meds to help but they still need to learn how to reverse the self esteem issues that happen. What most people who don't know what it is like trying to find out what is going on and why ... I thought I was doing something wrong and was a bad mother and I see it happen to younger Mom's all the time ... and unless others have walked in the shoes of a parent with ADD ADHD or ODD they really should keep their comments an dirty looks to themselves. You can see in the parents face how hard it is to learn to deal with it all ... wondering what your doing wrong ... I see that I always walk over, tell them to just take a deep breath and give them a little reasurance that it does get better with a little help. Sometimes the parent needs a little boost too. A few understanding words can take some of the weight off of them ...Happy Mothers Day to all who are in the Mom role of these very smart misunderstood children

Gina - posted on 05/04/2010

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Wonderful, Jean! It is so refreshing to hear about people looking at diet for the answer versus medication. It is very upsetting to me that doctors don't discuss diet FIRST before trying medications. Diet and lifestyle should always be the first course of action!

Tracey - posted on 05/04/2010

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I have a 13 yr old daughter who was diagnosed with ADD just 4 months ago. I knew something was wrong when we decided to take her out of a small lutheran school in 6th grade and put her in public. Her test scores say that she is extremely smart but her grades show something else. I was recently talking to one of her teachers and tried to explain what was going on just being diagnosed. I kept telling her that she has an extreme problem with organization especially with her remembering her assignments and writing in her assignment book. All the teacher could say every time was that my daughter needed to write all of her assignments in her book and that would help with the organization problem. One problem....writing the assignments in her book IS part of her organizational problems. Why do teachers think that ADD/ADHD isn't real???

Lee - posted on 05/03/2010

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If it works continue with it. I have a 20 year old son who also had adhd, but I didn't like the way he acted while on medication. He always seemed just existing. No emotions just plain, kind of hard to describe his emotional state. We decided to stop meds. He was happy, normal, extremely athletic, the problems started after he graduated. He passed high school with help from every teacher in the school.
They loved him so much, he was just a people person. Due to all the help in High school. College was such a challenge he couldnt handle it. So if meds are working stick with it.

Patricia - posted on 05/03/2010

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When my youngest was 7 he was diagnosed but my only choice was ridalin (cant remember how to spell it) The side effects had been advertised so much that I decided against it and as a rusult I had a life time of problems. With violent outbursts, inconsistant marks at school, social problems leading him to drop out of school and now he ison a pension and has been for 7 years (he is now 28) and I am still subsidising him. If it works, I say do it because it could be alot worse. They say mine is manic depressive as well as social disorder on top of the innitial problem...yes it could be alot worse. Maybe I could have averted some of it by putting him on the medication, years ago.

Donna - posted on 05/02/2010

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Hi Laura, i have a son who is on ADHD medication it took me a long time to consider giving them to him. I asked the specalist a lot of question about the condition and it took me a full year to decide He also so is an epileptic so it was a huge step for us but three years on it was the best thing we could have done for him . If anyone is going through the same thing dont be afraid to ask a lot of questions talk to
Dr and school teachers it helps cheers Donna

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My son has ADHD and a seizure disorder. He is on Concerta and it works great. He was diagnosed when he was a toddler yet the seizure disorder was a couple of years ago. I commend you on doing what u think is right. It is hard to raise a child with special needs. Another option u can maybe look at for school is an Individual Education Plan. Discuss that with the principal and see if it's possible. Remember you are the child's best advocate. Let me know about the IEP.

Gina - posted on 05/02/2010

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My son had a VERY severe case of ADHD that was nearly eliminated in just a few weeks by changing his diet. Yes, it was a difficult transition; but one well work my son's life and well-being. And, we are ALL healthier because of it! :)

Bernadette - posted on 05/02/2010

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I am a single mother here and my son has ADHD for 4yrs.But at first he was taking pills.I took him to a clinic doctor and thats what they gave me to give to him.Then I took him to his regular doctor and he said that the pills really don't do much for him so he put my son on patches and my son seems to do really well with them.He takes daytrana 30mg..When he his not on them he is like a kid on a sugar high.He does have problems reading but he's been like that since he was 3yrs old..I always ask his teachers how he is cuz they need to know that he has ADHD and they work with him..

Lynne` - posted on 05/01/2010

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something that may also assist is if you can find a local chapter of CHADD. There not only will you find support for yourself, but also for your grandson. It is hard to live with ADHD and knowing you are not alone is a help. My son's counselor when he was younger described having ADHD as being a great dane in a world of poodles. We found medication to be helpful for a while, but structure was they key at home and at school. My son is now in the Navy, very successful at his job, and is married to a wonderful woman and has a son who has almost as much energy as he had as a child. Good luck and God bless.

Suzanna - posted on 05/01/2010

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I agree with you. I am 55 and my 11 year old grandson lives with me he is also, adhd and has a mood disorder and facial tick. My heart goes out to you. Good luck.

Scarlett - posted on 05/01/2010

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I am in the same boat. I am 48 and my husband is 60. My granddaughter is now 11 and has been with us since she was born. I knew by the time she was 1 that something was "off" with how she acted, at least by my standards from raising 5 children. She has ADD, ADHD, ODD, CD. WeI never wanted to put her on meds but had no choice for obvious reasons. She has been on meds since she was 5. The medicine does not seem to be working as well as it did in the beginning. In fact, the meds are supposed to last 8 hours but we can tell within 3 that they are wearing off fast. But as you said, she does so much better in school with her medication. Actually, she is very creative. The problem is now that she is older and the meds are not working as well, life is a bit frantic and stressed. We have her in many sports to keep her active and around other children but she doesn't seem to have any "best friends".

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Wow, I admire all of you grandmothers raising your grandchildren. My son is slightly add, and it has always been a problem-he does his homework, then loses it, he forgets assignments, etc., etc. He take Wellbutrin, which helps with depression & ADD. After about 5 years, he is finally taking it faithfully. It is very difficult to get them to take it, esp. if you are the only one doing it. My husband would always forget.

1.5 years ago I was diagnosed with ADD. A new psychiatrist thought I might be and gave me a preliminary test w/ strong indicators. I then went to a specialist who tested me with various exercises and he also felt I was extremely ADD. When I started the medication, it was like a fog was lifted. I couldn't believe how much I could accomplish. I also never realized it was ADD that made me feel bored a lot. I don't have that problem anymore. I got my house ready to sell last year, and it was pristine. I'd never have been able to do it virtually alone if I wasn't being treated. At work, as a bookkeeper, I got the year-end data to the CPA 6 weeks earlier than I had the previous 7 years. This has also helped me regain my confidence in my abilities. I always thought I was an underachiever. Now I realize it was the ADD. I'd beat myself up for losing things, forgetting to put things on the calendar & missing appointments, etc. Everything is so much easier now. I can only imagine how much better I'd have done in high school & college. I might have even finished college! One day....

Cathy - posted on 04/29/2010

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My oldest son was ADD ADHD growing up. He is 31 and I still see some of it in him. He talks loud and when I talk to him he can not focus and changes the subject alot. He is going into a program that will help him and I pray it works because I feel he needs meds.

Anna-Marie - posted on 04/29/2010

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Vitamen B6 and B3, are the 2 most importend Vitamens that you can give him, the fishoil helps with the brain, but before you give this make sure the kid is not allergic to fish, And Cammomile tea, give that just before he goes to sleep.Do not put milk or sugar in.Or a hot glass of milk.
And if he is good with a computer, let him play, games for a while it, helps with hand eye cordinations and let him concentrate for longer. Hope this help, It for surely help my son.

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Our youngest son was diagnosed about 4 months ago with ADHD and we now have him on VyVance. We are still in the process of adjusting his dosage, but we've such a big difference in his concentration. Since we do home school two of our kids, we have been able to observe first hand many of his behaviors in relation to his the way he processes things. Just this morning, it has been a really rough one and I just want to throw my hands up. He is very bright and we are just beginning this journey that I wish we would have had help with a few years ago. Maybe that would have eased his frustration and ours. Many days are filled with frustration and just the unknown of a new experience... In the home school realm here, many of them do not believe in using medication to deal with issues, but I guess we are not typical home schoolers. If it comes down to the health and welfare of our child and finding ways to help him succeed in life... we are going to explore our options and make decisions based on what is best for him. Thankfully our pediatrician is one we've had for 17 years and he knows us well...

Jean - posted on 04/28/2010

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Had 2 myself with ADD/ADHD. One was on meds for 12 years, only supposed to be for 18 mo at a time. I cut out all red food dyes (lunchmeat, hotdogs, KoolAid, pop) and as much processed sugar as I could. I used unbleached Sugar in the Raw. Amazing how much the behaivor can be managed. Keep an eye on growth chart as some ADHD meds can stunt growth, oldest shot up 6 inches in 3 mo when I took him off meds and started herbals. One of them 'grew out' of the problem and is now serving in US Army. Best thing that ever happened to him, ADHD kids need routine, dicipline (sp?) and a firm, consistent authority to thrive. Is different for every kid, check with Dr. about herbals, sometimes Dr's don't agree with the uses. Best wishes and hang in there!

Kathy - posted on 04/28/2010

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My doctor will not medicate a child for add/adhd unless they are 6 yo. I have a son that was diagnosed with having the presence of some infant reflexes. These are pesent in 10% of the population. Without the appropriate treatment these kids go on to be labeled as add/adhd. I would check all options before letting them medicate. Sometimes it is add/adhd, but over 50% of the kids being medicated have something else. There are brain scans test that definately determine add/adhd behavior and observation test are not 100% definative.

Elizabeth - posted on 04/27/2010

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MaryEllen.... press your doctor harder!!! Just because your child isn't in a school doesn't mean she shouldn't be treated!!

I've been on the fence about my daughter. She has syptoms of ADD (and has been evaluated) but is not affected severely enough for me to want her on meds. She also appears to have dyslexia...but testing would be expensive and the school doesn't test for dyslexia specifically. (She does have an IEP for the above.) Mostly, she needs help being more organized and focused and she would do great in school!

Sharon - posted on 04/27/2010

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As is the experience of many others here, Mmy husband and I were resistant to using medication for a time, but he has now been on Ritalin LA for about five years and much better off. we did try dietry changes but they didn't work. Had not gone as far as trying to eliminate amines etc though - just additives. One question for MaryEllen Cox: why does home schooling make a difference to having your child evaluated? If you ask them for an evaluation shouldn' they just do it? Or is there a cost issue involved that doesn't apply for children who go to school?

Tracey - posted on 04/27/2010

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Yes Debra I read it does really make a difference with behaviour my twins take it daily

Tracey - posted on 04/27/2010

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I agree with you Nadeen I am not a fan of meds for this I have five kids and one who challenges me but with strict discipline a modified program at school co-op placement and following through with consequences and much love and understanding along with daily intake of OMEGA 3 which helps with cognitive skill building and VITAMIN E and counselling twice a week he is coming along and it is working for him and that is what matters

Jackie - posted on 04/26/2010

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Hello, I am new also and I have a son who was diagnosed at age 7 with ADHD. My husband was actually helping in his class, he never had or has a behavioral problem, it was always attention. He would look and act like he his hearing everything, but would ask him a question and he would not have any idea. Between the Doctor and the teacher's in his ES school, we decided for his well being to medicate him (trust me when I tell, we did not want to do this), but after listening to my Son tell me that he could not control the noise in his head, that scared me. But now that he is on medication, he says he can concentrate on one task. I don't believe in medicating and he will be in HS in 2 years. My husband I have read and continue to read up on this on a daily basis. Our plan with the Doctor's consent is to have him medication free by the time he reaches 9th grade. This is definitely a choice that parent needs to make, don't rule out medication, because sometimes they really do need it.

MaryLou - posted on 04/25/2010

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I have a nearly six-year old son who has ADHD. I was not thrilled to have him on meds (he is on 30mg of Vyvanse) but he is very bright and very busy. The meds help him focus and help him socialize. Before the meds, his behavior was off the charts. He tested on extreme levels and could not make it through the school day without many incidents. The change in his behavior and focus is amazing. He is readin on a second grade level and is making friends. Today he went to a birthday party held at a classmates house and I had no worries about his behavior. We do what we need to do to make our children happy and safe.

Lou (Helen) - posted on 04/25/2010

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I have a four year old and a seven year old and suspected the four year old had add at least as he had quite a few behaviour issues.My biggest fear is meds for this .I have under the guidance of a friend taken him off all gluten and un cooked dairy with major differences to him . He has been diagnosed by the child development team in my area as having preprioception ( Personal spacial awareness) which means he is quite a hard player and breaks stuff all the time .He is highly sensory seeking and loves to take Major risks.He is impulsive .He attends a Montessori preschool and this is the best thing we have done for him. He has learnt so much self control and personal responsibility I hate to think what we would be faced with had he not started there.
I highly reccomend going back to a very basic meat and three veg eating style.My personal opinion is that is why this has become such a prevalent thing. Our food is so messed with its not natural.
Good luck to you all dealing with these kids it is ground hog day every day and thats just the reality of our lives.
Take care :)

Jean - posted on 04/24/2010

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Single mother of a teenage daughter who was diagnosised with ADHD/Bipolar since the age of 3yrs.old, one time she made me cry, that I actually walked into Woodland Cntr. with mascara and eyeliner coming down my face from being stressed out because I couldn't handle my daughter. My daughter is hoh in one ear and I fight with her everday about her wearing her hearing aid, and the constant fighting with her to wear her hearing aid is everyday so I don't do it anymore, because she never puts it in until she gets to school so I have to ask everyday do you have your hearing aid? But my daughter is on medication also for adhd/bipolar, we just visited with her psychiatrist a couple of weeks ago and he is thinking of taking her off a couple of meds, he said they usually start to learn how to controll their surrounding by the time they are in 8 or 9 grade, well those yrs are coming around for her and I still get really scared about that since she at the age of 13 yrs. old she still has a very hard time in chosing the right and wrong choices, so half the time she usually goes for the wrong choice so that she can get me upset, she likes conflicts with me only. She has real good grades has only one C in one of her classes otherwise she has A's and B's. I also have an IEP for her also because she has many special needs also, so then when you tie all these together I have one huge life with alot of difficult decisions that I make on my own and which fight I need to pick or walk away from because it may be so minute. I still have many up and downs to this day since she is a teenager I also have raging hormones to go through and other things that women go through. But the one thing is that I have never given up on my daughter and I never will and I can honestly say if I didn't have these struggles then I know that my life would be boring,, even though I hate these struggles that the both of goes through I know that God is proud of me for doing the best I can and that is all that us parents can do with our children who has special needs and ADHD/Bipolar or any other hadicap that our children have. I have to keep reminding myself Life is Rough but our Childrens Life is going to be Rougher than it is right now.

Debbie - posted on 04/24/2010

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my daughter has a.d.h.d and is also ,on medication not a decision we took lightly ,but has made a world of differance

Tami - posted on 04/24/2010

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2 of the worst artificial colors are red dye it makes you hyper and yellow dye it causes impulsiveness especially for kids with ADHD or ADD

Carol - posted on 04/24/2010

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To Laura I had a child with ADD and my life was hell the doctors gave him meds and it did help, I watched a program on TV about hyper disorders and it showed that artifical colours and flavors as well as preservitives play a major part in ADD and ADHD childrens behaviours and when I took my son off the meds and ellimanated the bad additives from his diet he was a normal well behaved child so as far as Im concerned additives play a major roll in childrens behaviours and drugs are not the sollution there has been many studies on this . Back in the day when people lived off the land and not so much out of super markets there was no such disorders . my sollution to all parents is make sure you eat fresh and stay away from ( nasty additives )

Teena - posted on 04/24/2010

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It's good to know that I am not alone, I'm a 53 yr old grandmother who is raising her grandson of 5 yrs old. He's lived with me all but 6 months of his life. I've worked very hard with him the last 3 years to get him the right services etc.

Now mom has moved back into the picture, and gave birth to another little boy in December, since the birth of this child, My grandson has regressed back. He has become extremly agressive, does not listen at all, and puts him self in dangerous situations, (like running out into the street when a bus is coming, or trying to jump out his bedroom window (we live in an apartment on the 2nd floor). We finally took him up to Omaha to a Child Psychiatrist, (we are currently working with a psychologist here in town), she is wonderful, We will go back in a month, with hope that some type of medication may help him.
Diagnosis being thrown out is ADHD, Post Traumatic Stress, ODD, and possibly Bi-polar, however at his age, this would be very hard to diagnosis. Every Day I wake up and cringe, and ask myself, Can I do this another day? another hour? But somehow we push on and we manage. Anybody live near Lincoln NE?

Donna - posted on 04/23/2010

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There is nothing wrong with your grandson taking mediction. I am 47 and I have been on ADD medication for many years. It has made a huge difference in my life. I had trouble watching TV and paying attention to someone talking and I am so much better on the medication.

Denise - posted on 04/23/2010

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Im 49 and I adopted my 2 grandchildren, they are now girl 8 and boy 11. Boy had ADD and girl has SEVERE ADHD even on meds. They have tested her and she is borderline genuis (gifted is word they used) but her impulses are so uncontrolled. My daughter decided she wanted to raise her daughter, while I have her adopted I decided my child deserved a chance to raise her child...was very difficult to come to this decision. They are having some serious issues, my daughter is ADD impulisive and unmedicated. Both grandkids are medicated and with out it I can tell you our lives were HELL! Had to repain my house 3 times, they broke windows, doors, lights, painted lawnmower gold along with fence, then took mower apart, etc...need I keep going ? LOL life is NOT what I thought it would be at this age in life...does anyone else have this issue?...Just call me tired!

Beverlie - posted on 04/23/2010

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Laura, My son has ADD and he is on Focalin, it has really made our lives much easier and given him an outlet for his frustrations. he is very smart, fun, athletic and a loving boy. Thanks for sharing your frustration. We also had him evaluated and he has some auditory issues that compound his ADD. It was worth it find out what makes him tick.

Pauline - posted on 04/23/2010

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my son also has ADHD and also 2 of my nephews. thank god for the medication, but he only gets it on school days. i had breast cancer 2 years ago and he really started to struggle in school and so they tested him and found out he had ADHD. you are not alone. there are alot out there in the same situation.

Donna - posted on 04/23/2010

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Hi Laura, I only wish my 17 year old had been diagnosed earlier and was put on the medication before she ended up with other disorders caused by the ADHD. Always try medication, if they have no side effects and helps, it will make the child cope better, diet just wasn't an option for my daughter unfortunately. As my daughter gets older I hope she will not need the medication, but until then it was a good decision. it's nice to see so much support for children with ADHD on here.
Thanks
Donna

Paulette - posted on 04/23/2010

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I'm behind all of you in your decisions for ADHD. Why? It took Dr.'s 54 years to diagnose me. This happened 2 months ago. It was found when I insisted on an FASD Diagnosis. I was at college last year taking FASD and lights lit up inside my head. Answers! I was found to be on the other end of the Spectrum. Higher functioning. But this year things changed. Different jobs, dismissals, too high stressed. Then along comes OCD with PTSD and Neuro Behav. Disord (Alcohol related). The way I was treated in those elementary years went on into the highschool years. It was found that I was scored very high on the creative side. If any of our children are suspected as having ADHD, don't dismiss it. It can hurt down the road. Not many survive a marriage of 30 years and raising 4 children. As for my children having ADHD? That is something that they are asking now. Act on it now, get the help needed now and if medication works use it, if going an alternative route works...so be it. It is what works for you and your family that is the best recommendation and peace of mind and the supports you need in place and a God who does care.



P.Tremblay

mushtodo with muchtodo

Cheryl - posted on 04/22/2010

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if you dont want to try meds,,go for something over the counter,,like omega oils,,there is lots of papers saying how great they work,, I give them to my daughter with her meds, have cut down her meds with it!@ try it,,it will not hurt him, its what they need anyways!

Cheryl - posted on 04/22/2010

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My daughter had ADD, and I was not thrilled at her taking meds, she is soon to be 12, taking meds for 3 yrs now,,and what a difference it has made for her,,her inablitly to concentrate before made her hate school so much, now she is doing great, Im so proud of her!!

Nadine - posted on 04/22/2010

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My son has ADHD but so far I have not elected to put him on meds and he is currently enrolled in a behavior modification and socilization program. I attended a Parent Trainer course which I found very helpful to me.

Laura - posted on 04/22/2010

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Hi Rhonda- it is really nice to hear from people dealing with the same issues. I wouldn't change a thing about my life. My grandson is doing very well in school and part of that is due to the wonderful kindergarten teacher he had. She took him under her wing and he blossomed like a flower.He was reading the newspaper and the weather reports every morning. It looks like I will be raising him until he is grown and sometimes it feels like there isn't a light at the end of the tunnel but then I see him smile and know that it is all worth it. I look forward to hearing more from you.

Rhonda - posted on 04/22/2010

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Wow, Connie! I am right on board with you! Congrats to your son, and you! For my husband and I, a simular story was our inspiration to "keep on keepin' on" for our grandson! We have a friend whose son has severe ADHD. That young man is 22 years old and working on his DOCTORATE in Computer Science! Isn't that amazing? It is a beautiful testimony, just like yours, that children & adults with ADHD are NOT unreachable or unteachable :)
We are so blessed in our journey. Easy is not part of the picture, but determination IS! We struggled through so many medications until we landed the right one. The same with a pediatrician. Our first experience was with one that treated the disorder, NOT the child. Medication alone is NOT enough, lifestyles, routine & nurturing are a MUST. Acceptance is first and foremost, educating the entire family runs a close 2nd. Yes..we read and read and read. We've learned more than we thought we'd need to know, however having so much to fall back on is comforting because, as you well know, with ADHD there are NO TWO situations alike :) Thanks for sharing your wisdom, I am smiling and laughing WITH you when I think if our journey. You are dead-right....we are children's ONLY advocate :) may God continue to bless you with clarity, wisdom and life!

Connie - posted on 04/22/2010

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If the child has ADHD, the meds get them under control, if they don't, the meds speed them up. As far as testing goes, that, to me, is the final answer. My son was diagnosed ADHD at 9, but Ritalin was the only drug we tried and it did very little for him. We dealt with it. When he was in highschool, he tried a friend's medication (NO, he wasn't suppose to do that!) but he said for the first time in his life he knew what normal felt like after taking it. We got him on that medication and his whole world changed for the better. (Mine too!) He's now on the Dean's List at college. YOU are your child's ONLY advocate. It is up to you do whatever is necessary for your child to live their best life possible. For me, that included fighting the school system for YEARS, homeschooling, running through pediatricians until I found a supportive one, locating the best pediatric psychiatrist in our city to work with him, and reading, reading, READING on ADHD. Remember that ADHD children need to MOVE for their brains to work properly. They need to be allowed to pace during lectures, sway or fidget while doing their work, etc. This drives many teachers nuts, but it is VITAL to these children's ability to do their work. They need cues to re-focus, and extra help to stay on task. Don't even get me started on "busy work" and homework that the schools insist on torturing ADHD kids with...

Julie - posted on 04/22/2010

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Laura, we are just starting a half dose to see if my daughter we adopted from China 7 yrs ago us ADHD, I was the 1st to say NO MEDS for my kids but I watch the pain in her face at homework time. See her take 3 hrs with help for 4 sheets of paperwork & decided it's time to stop her suffering. If it helps her focus & gives her more confidence I am now all for it. I am praying this will help her & am just at the beginning of theis journey. She is very shy 7 ashamed to have to take a pill but after talking with her She is feeling better about it. She is the sweetest kindest child you would ever meet & it breaks my heart to see her suffer. So we are GOING FOR IT. It's about HER not a stigma, Thanks for sharing .

Rhonda - posted on 04/22/2010

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Hi Mary Ellen :) My heart is hopefull for you! Our pediatrician works closely with our therapist...in our instance, our pediatrician makes it clear that she is the doctor, not the behavior expert and she NEEDS the input of the therapist since that's who we "talk" to more about daily challenges (we don't go constantly, 1-3 times a month..usually once, more if I see significant changes due to growing and medication needs adjusting).
Would it be possible for you to see a therapist for a little while, maybe have the therapist communicate with your pediatrician on your behalf? I will surely keep your situation on my heart! Good luck!

Rhonda - posted on 04/22/2010

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Hi Laura, welcome. I have not been active on this board simply because I've been waiting to see if there are any other grandmothers with simular situations. Well, here you are.
I am 47, my husband is 53. We have 3 grown children, 2 grandsons. We have guardianship of our 6 year old grandson, with plans to adopt this fall. He has ADHD along with a host of other things that are mirrored through ADHD. We have lived as a "new family" since he was 2 years old :)
Like you, I RAN from the medication suggestion at first. And, again like you, once we finally found what was right for "us", it changed everything for the better! Our little champion is a drug baby, so his nervous system development was hindered. We engage in therapy of several sorts, have been "schooled" until we think our heads will explode, LOL but what a sanity saver...education! He does very well in school, his social skills have soared & his little mind has become a sponge...God bless you, Laura! Looking forward to hearing more from you!

Lisa - posted on 04/21/2010

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I totally agree with you, I have a developmentally delayed son who is 22 yrs, who doesn't talk and has ADHD and he is on meds since he was 4. I knew all about these med as I was on it when I was young so that helps as well. It helps alot for him to focus and any tasks tho he is only at the age of 5 yrs now. Some parents think it's a way out for them (parents) but it does help the child achieve anything tho I know my son won't get to the age level he is but it does help him concentrate on things like doing puzzles, bowling and hockey. (his age level at this time) When he doesn't have his meds in his system he is unfocused

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