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Anyone not like the girl your son is dating, living with, and now got pregnant?

Deborah - posted on 09/21/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

2

0

My son does not come around any more, call any more, and all he does is work and take care of her kids. Yes, she has two kids by two different men already. My son loves her but I think she is lazy. I am nice to her and have always been kind. At first they lived here until their apartment was ready and I watched the kids a lot, because she didnt, and she was very comfortable here. Once they moved they would come over all summer and cook out and swim and she was still very comfortable. Now that fall has set in she is no longer comfortable here and I do not see or hear from my son. They spend all their time at her mothers where they play dominoes. Her mother watches the kids every weekend and they are one big happy family. I have been squeezed out of doing the baby shower I said I wanted to throw her, and I wanted to buy the crib which she said ok, then I find out she had her mother buy it. My other son is dating her sister who is lovely and I adore. They come over all the time and she is also pregnant. I am throwing her shower and that is Oct. 6, I am also buying the crib, which I have done for all of my grandchildren. I just do not know what is wrong with this girl. Anyone with any ideas I would love to hear them.

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Anne Marie - posted on 09/25/2012

116

7

I don't really have any ideas but I know my son was dating a girl who tried to cut me out of his life. I always accepted her, welcomed her in my home and even took her in when her parents kicked her out with nothing but the shirt on her back. She even had the gall to tell my son he had to choose between me or her. When I found out that I simply told him "Well you best choose her then cause you can always come back to me" In the end they were kicked out of where they were staying and came back to stay at my place. She played many emotional games on my son and one day I had it, told her to stop and told my son to change his behaviour. Well instantly I "interferred" with a fight. My son demanded I appologize for this and I refused, saying I will not tolerate that kind of abuse in my house. They did eventually break up, thankfully she was not pregnant but I know she tried to get pregnant.

I can only suggest that you let your son know you have unconditional love for him and his child, you want to include his partner in your life but do not appreciate being shut out the way you are. I am not sure what kind of relationship you have with your son, hopefully it is an open and honest one you can talk to him. Let him know this is as much your grandchild as it is her parents grandchild. You respect them as parents to be and want to help. But at the same time you want to be respected as a grand parent to.

This all being said, maybe her maternity hormones are acting on her in a way that is not really like her, Many woman experience different emotions in pregnancy, it may no be the case but it wouldn't hurt to consider it as a possiblity. Once again expressing your concern for her and your desire to help her through it could only help in the end. Let them know you want to help without mediling, or interferring, expressing your desire and expectations in an understanding anda compassionate way can only be possitive. I really wish you the best of luck and hope this has been helpful.

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