Empty Nest

[deleted account] ( 7 moms have responded )

I have recently experienced the "empty nest" syndrome. I have also left the town I grew up in, all my friends, close family, and a beautiful family home, doctors, pharmacists etc. etc. In other words - my entire support system. My children, 23 and 26, who were still living at home, decided not to move with my husband and myself, which added to my misery. But - with a lot of effort and plenty of tears, I have started to make a new life for myself and there is light at the end of the tunnel. Can I mention that this all happened during the worst part of my menopause. Why did we do it? Who knows?.... it was done impulsively and during a trying time in our lives. I am a scrapbooker and if it wasn't for that - I would still be miserable and lonely. Scrapbookers are generally very friendly and welcoming. Jen.

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That would be really tough but try and look at it as a new adventure, meeting new and interesting people, and definitely stay in touch with your old friends, even though they may be miles away they are still a support.

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Michele - posted on 05/25/2010

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I can understand what you feel. My youngest daughter moved into her own place and now my house is so empty. I never realized how big it was until children were not here. Not working also adds to it.

Bonnie - posted on 05/22/2010

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Hi Jennifer. I'm sorry that you are feeling a little down right now but it will get better. I went through the same thing. It's been 5 yrs. now for me. Our daughter is 23 and in university. She moved away and my husband took a job in another city. It was tough at first but then we realized...we were a couple again and it was great! We travelled, and had date nights and conversations without having someone else and her boyfriend around. Don't get me wrong, I love our daughter but we lost ourselves. Give it a chance and you will see. It took me a while to find new friends, but I took art classes and learned how to play bridge and now I have more friends than I had in our old town and I don't want to leave. Sending hugs your way. Write me if you want to talk and I'll send you my number. I am 52.

Bonnie

Shelly - posted on 05/22/2010

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OMG, that sounds devastating to say the least, my daughter left home slowly as she was finishing college, working and beginning a real relationship that has blosomed into a partnership as they are now a family expecting a baby,( she graduated) and he owns his own home! My second child is more complicated and the reson I am 50 and probally am at an age where i SHOULD BE EXPECTING THIS BUT HAD A CHILD AT 35, therefore my 14 year old and his father and I don;t see eye to eye is an understatement and will do all that is within his borline personality disorder to persuade the Judge find former friends ( that never were) to be hateful and spiteful) and volare, you have a bitter custody battle for which I have not seen my son outside a supervised setting for two years and almost a year without seeing him at all. So, with that I cry and I am lonesome I moved in two mom's two bedroom condo as my son is 14 and I doubt this far into it he'll be back and if he does he can gladly have my room and I'll share with mom! Life take's us on some tough journey's through rough torraine and I for one believe it will come around soon, I have too! Court is in two weeks I need to be reunited with my son and in the mean time I will enjoy each day I have with my beutiful daughter and grandson who will arrive in September! Best of luck with your crisis, a fellow mom in distress. Shelly

Louise - posted on 05/22/2010

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Blimey this was a big move and major change to your life. I am about to experience the empty nest syndrome as my son is about to leave home for uni. I knew I would feel terrible so I suppose I planned ahead and had another baby who is 18 months old! The thought of mys on leaving feels me with dread but I know he needs to spread his wings. I think you have done a very gutsy thing and reclaimed your life. Get out and see the world around you and join some clubs locally you will soon make friends and your life will start all over again as a woman and not just seen as a mummy!

Gloria - posted on 05/21/2010

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sounds like you have had alot of change in your life but sometimes change is good i am talking from experience hope all goes well

Gloria - posted on 05/21/2010

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sounds like you have had alot of change in your life but sometimes change is good i am talking from experience hope all goes well

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