how do I keep the kids from destroying their room every time I clean it up? They have no respect for things around the house.

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Yvette - posted on 02/15/2009

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I make them each clean up their own rooms - usually on Saturday mornings.  I think I started this once they turned 4 or 5.  They aren't allowed to watch t.v., go outside to play, go on the computer, etc., etc. until their room is clean.  After they are done with their room, they call me in so I can inspect.  Once they get my okay - they get to do whatever it is they want to do.  It's gotten better over the years (mine are 15, 11 and 8) - they now know what I expect... so I hardly have to nag anymore.  LOL  Good luck - it never ends!

Elaine - posted on 02/14/2009

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I have two 13 year old boys and most of the time their room is a disaster area.  So, once or twice a week I make THEM clean it to my satisfaction.  It's getting better each time I make them do it because they know they will have to clean it up next time.

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Natalie - posted on 02/17/2009

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Ooooo, I like that idea. Don't know that it would work with my kids, but I might try it.

Kim - posted on 02/16/2009

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Get rid of the "stuff" and stop cleaning for them!  They need to learn early to pick up after themselves...and believe me, when they're teens, their rooms will be disaster areas...let it go and get yourself a snack and a glass of wine.

Tanya - posted on 02/16/2009

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Other than making the bed & hanging up her clothes (because she can't reach the bar) my 6 year old daughter cleans her own room. I help her do a deep cleaning 2 times a year but as far as the day to day pick up & respect of her space & toys that is up to her. She is very into American Girl dolls & at the price of them I expect that they are taken care of. We discussed this 2 years ago when she got her first doll & she has done very well. I wish that I could get my husband to keep things picked up as well as she does. Good Luck!

Cyndi-Ann - posted on 02/15/2009

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I agree with Kate to some degree. If they do not respect what they have, they likely have TO MUCH.  Once they have to earn it, or earn it back they may respect it more. We had the same problem and then I told them new rule in our house , at bedtime I went through the kids rooms whatever was on the floor or not put away was taken away and thrown out. Once they got down to about half their toys they learnt to put it away. As for clothes if I picked them up they were given away to salvation army. Two or three favorite pairs of Jeans and a favorite top or two was all it took.

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Dr Phil would tell you to take all their stuff away and give them back one thing at a time as they learn to show respect and pack away.

User - posted on 02/15/2009

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I started a star chart for my daughter. If she cleans her room before bedtime, she gets a star for the day. After 20 stars, she gets a reward of some sort. This worked well for a month or so but she's not as diligent about it now. So, now, I have started pulling out a big trash bag if she doesn't clean it when I tell her to. I haven't had to follow through with putting the toys in the bag but I will. I won't actually throw them away, but I will put them away, out of sight, for a month or two and bring them back out later.

Kim - posted on 02/15/2009

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I used to always clean my daughters room, but stopped a couple of years ago. she does it now. I have told her what I expect. She is slowly getting the hang of it. some weeks better than others. I told her I am not treating her like a slave. Just teaching her how to have expectations for her own home one day. We have a friend that children don't do anything and the house is a horrible mess. I told her if she doesn't learn how to keep things clean her house could be like theirs. She understands that.

Stephanie - posted on 02/15/2009

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I say let them go ahead - as long as they're not breaking anything or hurting themselves. Cleaning the house is for after my son is in bed or is napping. Although I make sure he takes part in cleaning up his toys before bed or before we have company - he's learning to pick up after himself.

Traci-ann - posted on 02/14/2009

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sorry that never going to happen my kid r all older now and they still can not clean there room and keep it clean i should have got them to help me clean it up when they were younger and maybe they would respect there room more sorry

Natalie - posted on 02/14/2009

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Give it up girl! I have two boys, 9 and 10. I figure if that is how they want to live then I'm not going to waste my time, energy and sanity in an excercise in futility. Do yoga!

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