I am exhausted all the time.

Dianne - posted on 01/04/2012

I really feel for you ...as an older mum I think it is just an age thing. I had my last child at 30 and really wanted to finish my child rearing by that age because I say my mum at 37 have her last child and then give in to everything my youngest brother wanted. Try to enjoy your time with your young one and you will have to push yourself to do what you would have found easy 10 years ago....I have a 17 year old and I am 47 and I find I just give in to her because I am tired and cant be bothered - not really an excuse but just do your best :)

Fiona - posted on 12/30/2011

I know the feeling. Could be me you're talking about. I'm 50 with a three year old son and a husband who just doesn't get the fact that housework is his responsibility too. I come home from teaching 10 yearolds, exhausted, struggle through prepping dinner, washing up, laundry. Dusting etc gets done at weekends. My doctor did help with antidepressants. At least I don't feel like murdering anyone now !!! Maybe you need to see yours too.

Julie - posted on 12/19/2011

"If Mama ain't happy, then nobody is happy." Therefore, yes everything is suffering. The sooner you teach your family this, the better. But it is up to you to let them know that things have to change. FIRST make the hair appointment! Bring the baby if you have to. I use to schedule my appointment around his nap time. He will have been fed and hopefully fall asleep in the car. Then just take the whole car seat in and set him down with a blanket over. SECOND, take a shower! If it is that important to you, hand the baby to your husband and say, "I am getting in the shower." Now all my husband and I have to say is, "tag your it!" THIRD, go on strike if you have to in order to keep your sanity. If the dishes sit in the sink, so be it. If the hubby doesn't like it, let him know he is free to do them himself, or wait patiently until they are done. This goes with meal, or any other demands that make you feel at the end of your rope. LAST but not least, Exercise! This will curb your exhaustion, give you energy and keep you mentally sane. I am 45 as well, and this is my saving grace. Making your well being #1 teaches your loved ones to do the same for themselves. They will also learn to respect you as an individual. Not just a wife, or a mother, career person, or cleaner ;)

Connie - posted on 12/16/2011

First of all, I figured out that a nice evening shower helps on the stress and nerves tremendously. I am 51 ~ today and raising 4 grandchildren ages 6 to 3. We both work full time, but my husband is the best man in the world and he does eveything I don't get to. Hang in there!

Connie - posted on 11/28/2011

You have to make time for yourself. I ended up divorced because of exactly the same situation. I now get one weeknight and every other weekend to myself. I also homeschooled and had a baby at the time. I started working out 3 nights a week, walking with my sons or doing a tape at home so I could still watch them. I started having a girlfriend over one night a week to talk, again so I was still with the kids, and making sure I did little things for myself. Like ensuring I got some tubby time or at LEAST a shower with no one staring at or talking incessantly to me. It made me feel so much better. Unfortunately, my ex-husband didn't want to step up to the plate and watch the children for a 1/2 hour or so a few times a week, so now he gets them a lot more. Hopefully you can get your husband to understand and help out a little more. If necessary, try counseling. If he won't go, then go yourself if you can. It really helps to feel that you are moving in SOME direction and making some types of changes if the current situation isn't working for you. Best of luck.

Vickie - posted on 11/22/2011

I remember those days. i too was once right there with you. I decided to take some time for myself. I left my husband with the kids for a weekend and went on a retreat with some friends from church. He agreed it would be good for me. He developed a new appreciation for all that i do. we still joke that he is a great father and a terrible mother. I am more careful now to take better care of my self. I will go to bed early. get up first and take my shower. i homeschooled 4 days a week and we all cleaned the house on fridays. Give yourself permission to put yourself first once in a while at least once a month while the baby is under five yrs. old. you are on call and working 24/7. does your husband get a day off of work? you should too.You will find your teen maturing and more helpful as the yrs. go by. You can make it through this season with the help of your spouse, your parents, in-laws, neighbors and friends. Do not attempt this alone. you're no super mom lower your expectations of yourself and higher them for your husband. If only for a few yrs. It really does get easier as the kids get older. Right now it is important to take good care of yourself. Make sure you eat right, exercise, and get plenty of rest. Also you might want to see a doctor and make sure you are not anemic or have another condition that is causing you to have low energy levels. Keep your priorities straight, take care of yourself and you will be the best wife and mother you can be.

Melissa - posted on 11/15/2011

I here ya I had my last child at 40 and now he is five . He has Apraxia of speech and sensory intragation disorder . I have an older son 15 with ADHD , teen Bipollar and Trechatelinimia ( He pulls out his hair to the point of bald spots ) plus now he has come out that he is gay. So ya I do understand . Latly I look in the mirror and wonder who is this lady Im looking at , I feel like a shell of myself. I do have a great guy that dose help me thank god . I had a historectomy 4 years ago and so now comes menopause GOD HELP ! LOL sense of humer is what carries me threw though latly that has gone down the shitter oops toilet...They say it will get easier HAA Right cause there kids are grown and gone LOL . But us older moms (dont you hate that saying) need to stick together . Take vitamins and talk to your doctor you may have a bit of depression and take that shower rally up everyone in the house and tell them your not there servant your a woman with feelings and if they dont do there part they will see a side of you they may regret!! Take your time in the shower and lock the door and tell them this is your time dont ask me were the diapers are and if the phone rings take a message .Own who you have left , set boundries I had too. I took out the diapers and made the bottle up and said Im taking a shower dont bother me till the door opens it did work . But you need to talk to your baby maker and tell him you made him I delivered him now weres the team work !! Right? Hope you will servive it is different being 40 and having a small child Im a mom of 4 . One 23, 19,,15 and 5 and what a differance energy isnt as much as it was then but I make up for it in other ways.