I have been left by my husband of 24 years for my best girlfriend, it's been over a year and I am still full of anxiety, help from anyone whose been here before!!!!

Jackie - posted on 06/11/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I have been on my own for a little over a year now, my husband left me for my best, lol, girlfriend, destroying two families in ten process. I am a pretty tough person, but this is kicking my ass. Anyone lived through anything like this before?
Love some help.
Jackie

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Marla - posted on 07/08/2012

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Jackie, I have not personally had to deal with this but my Mom lived this scenario back in the 70's. I was just a young child around the age of 6. And added twist to the story, my Dad married my Mom's ex-friend and my Mom remarried. My Dad was later killed in a motorcycle accident and then several months later my step-dad asked for a divorce. He then married, can you guess, the same woman that broke up my Mom's first marriage to my Dad, At the time I was too young to understand, but now I look at my Mom and think....what a strong person she is! She lived through hell caused by a woman who had to have the devil in her. What other excuse is there? My mom went on to marry a wonderful man who loved her to pieces. They had 23 wonderful years together. He passed away a few years ago from a heart attack. We miss him a lot. I am extremely grateful that my Mom didn't lose all of her trust, in people in general, with what she went through. I'm sorry for you that men are such jerks and that your best friend would do that to you. Hang in there! There is hope!

Brenda - posted on 06/18/2012

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I am a life coach and work with women in your situation. Would be glad to talk to you. You are feeling abandonment and betrayal along with a lot other emotions and they are stuck inside you. Thus the anxiety. Over time and some movement on your part and you will be at peace.
findyourtrueselfnow.com

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Patty - posted on 07/01/2012

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Jackie, I am so sorry. Yes, something similar happened to me and I lived through it. My marriage of 15 years ended in 1999 and my boys were 3 and 5 at the time. My family lived across the United States and we had only been in this area for 1 year at that time. Some days were wonderful, some days were awful. It was a solid year before I had a day without tears. But, it happened. I did things I didn't knew I could -- held onto my home, supported my children, made new friends, and took the high road. You can't control anything about your ex. You only have control over yourself. The good mental health of my children was one of my primary goals. And my children and I became our own family. I placed good male role models in their lives to compensate for what their Dad lacked. And, it also had the effect of reminding me that there are really good men out there. Unfortunately, their dad is on marriage #3 and continues to send chaos into our lives, but we choose to let go of a lot of it... sometimes more effectively than others. Get some good friends and talk, talk, talk to them. Forgive -- not because he deserves it, but because it will eat you alive if you don't. And, live YOUR life. Life is too short to waste it. Don't discount counseling or church. Both can be a huge source of hope and support during this time. Take care. :)

Annie - posted on 06/28/2012

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Hello Jackie, This is a shame what he did to you. I'm sorry as I am sure this has changed your entire world or turned it upside down as well.
This would be so difficult for me. IF you have to see this man or woman, then I WANT u to know that by law if there are kids involved and visitation, occassions where u have to see him or her, then I am sure there are some changes that could be made where you would not have to run into him or her. I am sure the kids are confused...Mama's friends is living with and kissin Daddy now and mama has moved out...HOPEFULLY YOU DID GET THE HOUSE..alimony and childsupport...There should be a law to punish her as well. My prayers are with you and your family.. God give you strength, courage an wisdom as the serenity prayers says. God Blesss, Annie shoehill@yahoo.com

Joyce - posted on 06/25/2012

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Now is the time to get close with family and even your church, stay away from people who were close to your friend and ex, I kind of understand your situation my ex started cheating on me left me with three small children to take care of by myself, my family and my family church are who got me on my feet, and helped me deal with my issues. You are in my prayers.

User - posted on 06/12/2012

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Hi Jackie I have never had this happen to me, and I hope that in time you will get thru this, However, this has happened to one of my friends and her best friend at the time. Well her bestie stole her man right up under her, and I honestly feel that was treacherous. When she was having problems with her husband, she would talk to this friend unknowinly, that secretly she like her husband. Next the girlfriend was telling the husband what his wife was saying about him. Well now him and the so- called bestie are married, and act like nothing happened. Unbelievable! Before the Girlfriend got involved they were almost married 20 years.



I know you said lol, but that is not funny, also 2 families were involved. Now he is playing daddy to her kids, and not even living with his own child.

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