I'm a pregnant mother at 43 with a 20 month old already......

Janice - posted on 01/17/2010 ( 76 moms have responded )

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How many other mothers are out there that waited to have children at an older age?

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I am 41 and have 3 daughters, ages 5yrs, 3yrs and 10 months. I am glad I waited, but sometimes it is hard. Think maybe I may have had more energy in my 20's...LOL! But I love it all just the same. I did the career thing first, now I feel more settled, and wiser, to be able to raise my kids. I volunteer at the school and meet lots of other moms, which is wonderful.

Cherie - posted on 01/11/2012

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HI i'am 42 in april.I have a 18,7,3,6 and 6 month old,they are all girl's.I was 23 when i had my oldest and didnt get pregnant with my second child until 11 years later!The age gap between my 4 younger children is alot smaller haha :)It's not that i waited to have children,i wanted to be a mum,this is just the pattern of how i got pregnant..

Janine - posted on 01/08/2011

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Hello im 43 and I have twin girls that are 3 and half, plus a older boy who is 19yrs. Its a huge gap but due to a new relationship I felt the urge to have another child but had twins, I didnt think I would want more after the girls so I had hubby get the snip but now Im keen to try one more time and the urge is quite big, I have been wondering if it was a good thing to do especially due to my age, I turn 44 in august. It seems to be quite a common thing for older woman to have kids, but of course hubby would have to get a reversal or maybe I find a sperm donor but what a pain in the butt, it was suggested that maybe I try his brother then at least there would be a connection?? we have twins on both sides and I have heard that the changes of having a mulitple birth again is quite high, oh what to do..................

Dawn - posted on 01/06/2011

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So glad I didn't have kids earlier. I feel more developed as an adult and I believe it has made me a better mom to my girls. Hoping to pass on that wisdom...

Kelly - posted on 01/03/2011

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Looks like you got a downpouring of responses - and I will add one more.
I am 45, have a 23 and 24 year old, have a 4 and 5 year old, expecting again. You can do this!

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76 Comments

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Courtney - posted on 10/14/2013

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I had my first child when I accidently got pregnant 3 months after we got married. my second child was born 3 years later and was planned. 20 years later when my husband were on a trip tp Europe and were on a train to paris. they lost one of my suitcases that had my milex diaphragm in it. we had to much to drink that night had sex with no diaphragm, now here I am 43 years old and pregnant.

Nik Rosilawani Nik - posted on 10/20/2012

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I'm not become a mother until now and my age already 43 years old..I been try to get pregnant since I get married 8 years ago but still none

Robin - posted on 01/10/2012

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I had my first at 40 and my second at 43.5 (this past December!). I see the benefits of being older and wiser and set in a career, but I do wish I'd started even a few years earlier. We went through a LOT to have the second-- fertility doesn't always cooperate. And also the energy levels aren't the same as even earlier in the 30s. But I am loving being a mom and having the freedom to take time off here and there in my career to spend with them.

Linda - posted on 01/06/2012

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Hi, I had my second child at 40, and third at 41.... only 14 months apart. To start off with things were a bit tough, but as theyve got older it has got easier. Im now 48, and although many of my friends have children much older and now have 'their own time' back, so to speak I wouldnt change it for the world.

Denice - posted on 01/02/2012

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I am a pregnant 43 yr old with a 17 and a 21 yr old son. Scared to death of starting over. I feel like I am alone and in the minority being pregnant in my 40's..

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I had my first at 36, second at 38 and third at 41. I might have had more, but thought the risks were getting too high :-)

Melissa - posted on 10/05/2011

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Me too!!! I have a 13 month old and just found out that I am 6 weeks pregnant. I had my first when I was 41 and this one I will be 43. I have to ask, are you having a problem telling people that you are pregnant and afraid that they are going to either tell you or look at you like you a crazy?

JoAnne - posted on 01/03/2011

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I'm turning 50 next month and have a little girl who just turned 4 yesterday, My older children (both boys) are 21 (soon to be 22) and 23 - all of my children are from the same husband. We will be married 29 years this year. We are VERY tired, but very happyy parents!

Angel - posted on 01/03/2011

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Hi Janice. Congratulations! I had mine at nearly 42 and 45. I write about motherhood after 40 regularly at http://www.fllowerpowermom.com, including many personal stories of other over-40 moms. If you have any questions or issues you'd like me to cover, please feel welcome to let me know. Blessings, Angel

Catherine - posted on 01/02/2011

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I am 44 yrs old and have a 7 yr old and a 5 yr old (both girls)--I love them both and wish that I didn't work (as a teacher) to have more time to focus on them. I would love to have more but worry that my eggs may be getting up there and worry about down's syndrome.

Ajuanndel - posted on 12/31/2010

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If people think you are a grandma, it's a shame. I have a son that is 7 and I'm 42. Sometimes people try to make me feel bad for being so "old" as they say when they have children going to college and I'm just getting "in the game" as they put it. Let's be honest, a lot of my friends had babies way young and instead of them feeling bad they want to do reverse and make me feel bad. I'm not saying they should feel bad for having a child so young, but I refuse to feel bad for waiting!

Robin - posted on 01/30/2010

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I am 48. My baby is 26 months old. I have twelve children all about 2 years apart. I am so grateful that I don't have an "empty nest" as most women my age. I believe continually having young ones in the home has kept me feeling young...I'm still "mommy" at 48!

Donna - posted on 01/28/2010

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I finished having kids at 23. I applaud you for being able to have kids at this age. I could not imagine having little kids now. I am 47 and my kids are 28 and 23 (24 in July)

I hope your pregnancy is a healthy one and you have a safe delivery.

Sue - posted on 01/28/2010

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I'm 42 with a 15 year old and a 3 year old...both boys....and I also have an 18 year old step son...AND I'm pregnant and due at the end of March. I must say I agree with everything that everyone is saying, I'm more patient now, in a better place financially, and I'm also healthier than I ever have been. Take a lot better care of myself than when I was in my twenties that's for sure! I worried a lot about how the older boys would handle it but they are just so wonderful with the youngest and their friends are just great with him as well. Some people think we're nuts to be starting over again with diapers and school, we hear a lot of "but you were almost done!" but we love all of our kids. One thing I don't do is expect the older kids to babysit....another thing we hear from a lot of people "at least you have bulit in babysitters"....every once in awhile is okay but I would never want the older boys to feel any resentment toward their brother or us so that's something we feel pretty strongly about. It can be tough some days making sure we stay involved in what the older boys are doing along with getting to playgroups and story times but we get it done and the boys all seem happy.

Denyse - posted on 01/27/2010

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Hey Janice, I had my daughter when I was 37. I turn 41 next week and she will be 4 in April. It's interesting being an older mom, especially when we attend classes with other mothers who are so much younger than I am. It's great having her and I wouldn't change a thing.

Kristina - posted on 01/27/2010

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I love the fact that I waited. Had my first one at 38 and my second at 40. I think being older gives you a different insight, however, patience....lol The truth...I was already too set in my ways. I am learning and growing everyday with my 2 beautiful and wonderful children. I would not trade a moment.

Teri - posted on 01/27/2010

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Just turned 49 yesterday, twins just turned 19 months. One of the best things I have done

oh and I forgot to mention I have four other children all grown, 32, 30,26 and 22 also have five grandchildren married a younger man 13 years difference. I wish I would of had the tools that I have now when I was raising the older kids. Good luck to eveyone.

Kathy - posted on 01/27/2010

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I'll be 43 in February and my oldest is 3 and my youngest two are 22 month old twins. Some days I think I must have been crazy for waiting so long to have children and having them so close together, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world! I love motherhood and every day is a new adventure! The kids keep me young...and I agree, you're only as old as you feel!

Jeanne - posted on 01/27/2010

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Hi Janice,
Due to two marriages I have 4 children. I am 60 years old and my oldest is 38 and my youngest is 15. There is a 36 yr. old and a 17 yr. old in between.They have kept me young. The only bad part was my older children were having children and I as a grandmother disn't have as much time for my grandchildren. Otherwise I wouldn't trade them for the world. Good luck. Jeanne

Janet - posted on 01/27/2010

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I'm 43 with a 5 yr old daughter and an 11 month old daughter. I have alot more patience and finances than when I was younger. I do not have the energy or the body that I did though! We have no extended family nearby, but my husband works from home and I only work part time. I would not have had 2nd if I had to work full time. I left space between them on purpose. My older daughter is self sufficient and plays well on own. I can rest when I need to. My 2nd daughter is VERY active!



I love being a mother and didn;t have children earlier due to lack of a partner! I do have lots of friends that have waited for various reasons. Most find tiredness the main problem. I consider myself very lucky. I have alot of friends as well that wanted children, but never did for various reasons(mainly lack of partner or willing partner). Time passes quickly.



Good luck and plan for help/assistance etc... if you need it when # 2 arrives!

Sharon - posted on 01/27/2010

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hi there janice, i am 41 and have a 7 and 8 year old me and my partner of 20 years is now thinking about having another one? we have not made a dission yet but reading about others who have done it, do help.

Ingrid - posted on 01/27/2010

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I am a single mom of 50 and my son is 7. I have loved every second of the entire experience, pregnancy, delivery and growing up. I have severe RA so sometimes it is hard to make it to the park, pool, museums, soccer, birthdays, etc. but i make sure we go all the time. After all you only get one chance. I had several miscarriages before and after so I feel he is my special gift from God. He has blessed my life. I never thought I would be a PTA mom! I say if you are of good health - go for it!

Christine - posted on 01/27/2010

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It is nice to see all these postings. I had my little guy at 38, but it took us a few times since I had two previous miscarriages. We had a miscarriage after him two years ago. Not sure what the future is going to bring, but I would love for him to have a sibling.

Una - posted on 01/27/2010

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I only got married @ 41 and had my first (& only) child at 43 (3 months shy of 44). It was an awesome pregnancy, felt wonderful throughout... and I had an easy natural delivery. Or so all the Dr's and nurses told me. They could not believe I was 43 and that it was my first because I made it look so easy. Anyway I wish I could have had another, but I did not want to push my great luck. My daughter, now 8, is my JOY!!! I may be the oldest Mom in the group I hang with, but they also say I am the coolest. Many of the kids agree.

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Yes,I agree,I am able to be a SAHM now,probably not in my 20-30's. I am more patient and cherishing every moment w/my lil miracle,esp after I beat cancer in 2001,I did not think I'd be able to get pregnant. I am probably much more tired than a younger mom,but daily naps are my life saver. I am sad that both my parents passed away so my lil guy missed out on those grandparents. And I hope so much to live to be old enough to seee my lil guy get married and have his own kids!!!

Emily - posted on 01/26/2010

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I accidentally got preggo at age 40 and had a healthy baby girl at age 41 - I breast fed her and accidentally got preggo again - did not even know it til I was 3 months along and had a healthy baby boy at age 42. They are 12 months and 22 days apart. I say the days because every day makes a huge difference when they are so little. I think as an older mom I am more understanding, patient and much wiser - all advantages for new moms. I think ,also, since I had my 20's and 30's to have FUN that I am not missing out on anything. I just hope I can make it another 30 years to see them grow into adults. Maybe, even, I will get to be a grandmother.

Sharon - posted on 01/26/2010

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Hello mom, welcome to the world of older mom's having babies, I feel that if the body can still re-produce a life then why not let that life be. It is not the age, it is the health of the mother, How fit is your body to have a child, can we withstand the pain and the change that we will endure as we go through this change, and to be honest with you Janice,I had my last son when I 38 years of age, he is now 9, i am a mother of 8 7 living. So no, there is nothing wrong with a woman of 40 or more to have a child, just watch your health. Enjoy your new life and your life will be good to you

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Good luck to you! I am 44 yrs old w/a 3yr old boy! I miscarried @ 40 and 41 after not trying to get pregnant. My husband said,let's try one more time and it was 3rd time lucky,we have our beautiful boy. I wish we could have had more,but I got my tubes tied to avoid the heartache of another possible miscarriage.

Robyn - posted on 01/26/2010

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I had my 1st when I was 35 and was scared to death of becoming a Mom at that age. I'm now 44 and my youngest is 4 and life is great. They keep me young though on some days I'm exhausted, but how many Moms at our age still play barbies, make forts and play cars? I would not have done it any other way now that I look back.

Amanda - posted on 01/25/2010

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I am 40 and have a soon to be 18yr old and a just turned 1yr old, My husband wants at least one more, I am a little scared as both my babies were 2mth premmies, first one had a pyloric stenosis(blockage of the bowel) & ,my baby had to be operated on at 12 hrs old due to an undetected TOF (tracheo esophageal fistula) her osephagaus wasn't joined. I worry that if I go ahead and have another ,that baby will have complications also I just don't know if I can be that selfish both my girls are really good now follow up medicals now and then for the 1 yr old thats all ?????????????????????

Alisa - posted on 01/25/2010

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I didn't really wait on purpose. I got married at 34 and God blessed me with a child at 41. He is 8 years old now and keeps me busy. I am also raising a very busy 2 yr old little girl which is my husbands grandaughter from a previous marriage. Between the both of them they keep me hopping along with working 40 hrs a week. Don't have the patience and energy I had when I was younger but love every moment I spend with them.

Colleen - posted on 01/25/2010

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Hi Janice I had my first daughter when I was 22 yo and she has graduated HS and now out on her own and in College. I then was in the process of adopting 5 yrs ago when I was 37 and then got pregnant and was estatic.... I didnt think I could have kids. then a yr later at 38 had a son excited my first boy but a little overwhelmed now a teenager, a 1 yr old and a newborn plus a career of 11 yrs so after my son I had a tubual libigation feeling ok I can get pregnant so this cant happen again and felt I was getting to old to have kids. Well Janice I am now 42 yo and pregnant again lol unbelievable.... I am now 7 1/2 months preg and 2 toddlers. I did lose my job a yr ago so now I am a stay at home mom and I think it may of been easier when I was in my 20's energy wise, but wisdom and patience it is way easier as ur older. your usually more establised, patient, and can laugh off more. God gives us wonderful gifts to love teach and for us to con't to learn from. Your baby has so much more to benefit from u now then when u were younger. Best of luck

Anita - posted on 01/25/2010

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one thing I noticed in some of the moms statements was being able to stay at home..I was able to stay at home with my daughter her first 3 years now she is ready for headstart and my 22 year old was jealous a little because i had her in my 20's and had to work alot and wasn't able to stay at home with her. But now we all get to do things togther....So it worked out!

Lynn - posted on 01/24/2010

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Hi
I was a first time mum at 42. Ella is now 9 1/2 months old and I'm now 43. Most of my friends who have had children are much younger than us, but Ella is keeping us young and not quite crawling and then I understand the fun begins.

Geneva - posted on 01/23/2010

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Best of Luck to you!
I have a 30 year old daughter, 4 sons ages 20,19,5, & 3. Also have 2 grandchildren...6 & 4 and another grandchild on the way! WHOO HOO! Never a dull moment but I do get very tired and my last pregnancy at 43 really was quite difficult. I like to joke that I am a retired "babymaker"

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I am 41 and I have an 18 year old son and a 21 month old son. I am thinking about having 1 more. I don't have as much energy as I did the 1st time around, but it is worth being tired. I am also able to stay home this time around. Glad to hear that there are so many "older moms."

Peggy - posted on 01/23/2010

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I have just turned 50 and had my last child at 43 (number 4!) It was a great decision and my older children are 23 and 22 so the little one has 3 mums!

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I am 48, 49 in March. My son’s are 5 and 3 and they are the sunshine of my life. We tried for several years to get pregnant and gave up…. And then! I am a better mom now then I would have been at 25. I robbed the cradle so my husband is 12 years younger and I think that I am a good mom with a great job and my husband is a fabulous parent and is our stay at home dad. I would not give up my boys for anything!

Sue - posted on 01/23/2010

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i am 41 and have 5 children had my latest one at 39 he is the best thing that ever happened to me i think its so much easier having a child when we are older i had my other children when i was young so i didnt really get to enjoy being a mum as much as i am now i have a 19 17 16 15 and a 2 year old and i wouldnt change anything for anything in this world having my 2 year old has bought me completeness in life i get so tired at times but i wouldnt change that for anything but having 4 older children is also fantastic 4 babysitters lol

Jodell - posted on 01/23/2010

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i am 41 and have a 14 year old and a 4 year old man o man its hard to keep up.

Sheryl - posted on 01/22/2010

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Congratulations! I'm 43 and considering another one. Are you tired alot? What do you think are the benefits of having one after 40?

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