I'm over 40 and pregnant!!!!

Cathleen - posted on 02/10/2009 ( 97 moms have responded )

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Hi Moms! I just found out that I am expecting my fourth child. I am 42 and my husband if 50. I am thrilled. I am also nervous about being my age and complications with the baby, ect. I could use a pep talk! Thanks so much! My name is Cathleen and my other children are girl, 13; boy, 9; and girl, 4. Thanks!

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Amanda - posted on 09/19/2013

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I had another child at 40 after an 18 year gap. i was equally surprised! the one thing i can tell you from having this experience is that when i tell people i have a grandson and a son that are only 3 weeks apart is that it is VERY common. i wish i had a buck for every "my uncle is younger than i am" and "my friend, cousin, or self was conceived at 40, 45, 48. i think it actually used to be quite common because there was no birth control and families were HUGE with kids all the way from newborns to having their own kids. the doctors treated me like a freak of nature and as though i was extremely high risk, but i had NO complications and have a beautiful, healthy 2 year old as a result. i looked at statistics too and they scared the hell out of me! my grandmother-in-law gave birth in mexico at 46 with a midwife- really, this happens in other countries and used to in this one all the time!! hang in there and don't let other's opinions and so called "knowledge" divert from such a beautiful experience (minus the puking and aches)

Angel - posted on 07/30/2013

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Hi Cathleen,
Well congratulations! I'm happy to "pep talk" away! :) I had both of mine at 41 and 44, after conceiving naturally. I remember feeling like it was nothing short of a miracle, especially the one at 44 (who now happens to be 7 years old!).
I'm now an advocate for women on the journey of motherhood after 40. What you need to watch out for now is how the healthcare system can scare you about your age related risks. But it's important that you have a happy, relaxed pregnancy.
Here's a list of articles you can read up on that talk about some of the challenges you'll face and what you can do to overcome them: http://achildafter40.com/challenges-bene...
Wishing you a happy over-40 pregnancy and birth!!

Nicolle - posted on 03/23/2013

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I am 44 years old, I have 12 year old twin daughters, a 2 year old and a 7 month old. I am lucky they are all healthy as can be! I had all the required tests and ultrasounds. I can tell you I was so worried with my last two being in my 40's, but I ate super healthy, did not take any meds of any kind and stayed away from places were people smoked and I do not drink. I'm sure you will have a healthy baby, most women do. Just take care of yourself. If you have already had children when you were younger, you are most likely to have a normal pregnancy later in life according to a study I read conducted in Sweden.

Lilly - posted on 12/01/2013

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Hi!
Words of encouragement, I'm 42 and 23 weeks pregnant although it was not plan. You can still do it all u need to do is to be positive. Good luck!

Patti - posted on 12/01/2013

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Hi there, i am here to tell you it could be the most precious thing for your family because it was for ours. I had two kids in college one in hgh school, one in middle school and one entering elementary a month after my miracle son was born. I was told it would be a miracle to get pregnant and i do believe in miracles. He is now 17 years old and a senior in high school and we have done the whole circle so i can tell you with all confidence that it can be a real blessing. He was uncle Joe at age 5 and he thought he had 5 sets of parents... everyone came to all his ballgames cheer him on when he was in plays... He was and is the grandchildren s hero, to which i now have 13 with 2 more on the way. I am a praying woman so i suggest you take it up if you don't already because i think it is what makes it work out. God is good and He has entrusted you and he will equip you... God Bless you
Patti R.

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CINDY - posted on 04/15/2014

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I was married at 35, had my first a boy, at 37 and my second a girl at 44. The second was a lot easier to deliver. She came out in 15 minutes. Very easy pregnancy. The first was a nightmare. Gained too much weight and the baby refused to come out. Had to have serious intervention. The both of us barely survived. Hence it took me quite awhile to get my head wrapped around trying it again. Having a girl was worth it ! She is 10 now. And she is lots of fun!

Anne Marie - posted on 03/28/2014

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I am 40 and just found out today that I am pregnant with my third. Was not expecting this at my age. So worried but my dr didn't seem that concerned. I think I read every single post on here today. Helped a lot.

Peggy - posted on 03/05/2014

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I just found out 2 days ago that I am pregnant with our 4th child and I will be 40 this year. We were very shocked as we had already closed this chapter and was about to have an ablation and my husband a vasectomy. I am soooo worried, scared and excited all at the same time. Our sons ages are 9, 8 and 4.

Karen - posted on 01/25/2014

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I am 45 and I tried for seven years to get pregnant for the second time. I decided to try ifv two times and then finally put it behind me if it didn't work. The fertility doctors said I only had aTwo percent chance using my own eggs. I did a lot of research, went on a total body cleanse, took fertility superfoods, took DHEA , extra folic acid, ate lowcarb, cut out caffeine, took coenzyme q10, multivitamin with loads of antioxidents, acupuncture, meditated, prayed, did some fertility hypnosis even. And then I went through the ivf protocol. Which is not easy, but I was commuted to just trying it, not getting obsessed about it, and on the second and last try I got pregnant and am now 18 weeks and doctors say everything looks great! So don't give up ladies, all things are possible. You must get your body, your spirit and your mind vibrating at a high level of health! And then give it to god, and don't forget to serve others in your community while your going through it all.

Margaret - posted on 01/17/2014

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hi my name is Maggie I am 52years old I have a daughter 35 I was 17 when I had her only child I had a good job worked 40plus hours fast pace person then 6years ago at46 I found out I was pregnant I was so scared up set every thing but I made it my son Nathaniel was a healthy baby boy so we are tougher than we think god bless

Margaret - posted on 01/17/2014

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hello mom I am 52 now and gave birth in 2007 to a baby boy at 46 was 29years from my first daughter I thought I was going to the change of life. they said no you are going to have a baby . I was up set scared out of my pants my husband said we are to old to have a baby. but I could not say lets not have this child I could never forgive my self plus god would not for give me so I have a 6year old in kindergarten at 52 . boy some times its hard to keep going. but before I worked 40 plus hours ran my head off at job was a very fast pace person .but now I think it has all just got me . but ha I am good and my son is healthy. and I been married for 36years miracle thank you all to see other moms out there older also I get tired of are you gram no I am mom

Rachel - posted on 12/19/2013

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Hi Moms,

I am 42 and recently found out that I am pregnant. This is my first pregnancy. I have been very worried because of my age. Yesterday I had my first ultrasound and saw a heartbeat and dr. said all looks exactly as it should. I will be 7 weeks pregnant tomorrow. She also said we are 85% sure to have normal pregnancy from here on out. That information helped me to relax a little. Most doctors didn't want to see me until 8 weeks, so I am very glad I found this doctor, I don't know if I would have made it to 8 weeks, I was so nervous.

Samantha - posted on 12/01/2013

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My friend is 42 and gave birth to 2 perfect twin baby girls recently. Mom is fine also. I've read in a Developmental psych text book that teens are more apt to have dawn's syndrome babies than older women do also. Hope that helps.

Amy - posted on 11/25/2013

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I was 6 weeks from turning 43 and my husband was 50 and we had an easy pregnancy (first and only), natural birth and healthy child. Mind over matter...
The book that helped me was Birthing From Within. It balanced all the scary information that is out there about women over 40.
It made it MY story and my birth and allowed me to do it my way with sacredness and grace.
Wishing you all the very best on your journey.
Amy

Tanisha - posted on 11/19/2013

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Hi, moms. I'm 40 with an 11 year-old and a six year old. So many trials and losses that I couldnt keep count anymore. I can't be more than 3 weeks and we are soooo thrilled at a chance for this miracle. I am a manic deppressive so I am very skeptical of taking my meds because of possible birth defects. Any advice on what to do to get this pregnancy safely to a birth would be greatly appreciated. I dont think I can handle another loss. Thank you and I pray for safe delivery for all new moms out there

PAMELA - posted on 10/22/2013

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hi Cathleen, im a mum of 8 month baby, and i am 42yrs. For me the only thing was i developed a goitre, and had to go for tests. Funny enough my results are all clear. Not sure what to do. I love my baby so much, it was worth it. But i will tell all mothers 40 and above, get checked up every month, eat well and rest.

Pamela

Donna - posted on 10/20/2013

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Trying and trying for baby number two! I had my son when I was 37 almost 38. My doctor said I tested like a 22 year old. I feel pretty much the saem as I always have now and really hope it is in the cards for me and my husband. So far no luck, have had stressful times which I am sure did not help. I feel as though I am not done. I absolutely love being a mom and hope for one more. Thank you in advance for any tips!

Cindy - posted on 09/27/2013

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I just found out today I'm pg and will be 43 in a few weeks! Also excited but also have the same concerns. Please help fellow moms to be in 40s or others who've had this experience!!

Angel - posted on 09/17/2013

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Wow, congratulations Cevia! Pregnant at 52! I thought I had a miracle when I got pregnant (naturally) and gave birth at 44! I'm now an advocate for women on the journey of motherhood after 40 and I know that many of them would see you as an inspiration. :) Gosh, I'd love to hear more of your story. Will you keep us posted?
BTW, you might like this--on our support site, we have a whole section with articles on the benefits of motherhood after 50: http://achildafter40.com/challenges-bene... You're not alone! :)

Cevia - posted on 09/16/2013

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Hi there cathleen im 52 and my husband is 49 and he is my second husband we have one child together and he is ten and we are pregnant now almost 4 months and Im over the moon . we were not even trying to have a baby . I actually thought I was going into menopause but nope surprise im pregnant and I plan on breastfeeding too . I breastfed our son . My husband told people at work and they were like Omg ...we are thrilled . He is already taking pictures of my pregnant belly LOL he is so cute , my hubby ..

Deborah May - posted on 05/18/2013

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hi my name is debbie i have 9 children an just found out im expecting number 10 and i just turned 40yr this month im worried ? what are the risk

Chana - posted on 04/10/2013

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Kerry,
I am right with you. This was fnny to me! I could have written this post! I got married, first time at 39 had my first at 41 second at 42 both healthy and full term. I also refused the testing that the push for "advanced maternal age" in our mind it didn't matter, they were conceived in love and were loved from day one regardless. I have no older children either. I know I would not have been as good of a parent at a younger age. The hardest thing for me was the first time I someone thought I was Grandma. Now I just do't respond to it.

Kerry - posted on 04/09/2013

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Hi, I got married (for the first and only time) when I was 38. I brought my first daughter home from the hospital on my 39th birthday (she is about to turn four) and I had my second daughter when I was 41 (she is 16 months old). My 43rd birthday is next week. I don't have any older children. To be quite honest, I don't think I would have been near as good a parent as I am if I had had children when I was younger. Congratulations on your pregnancy! Best wishes!
PS My children were born fine, despite the "dire" warnings of the geneticists and the push to have an ammnio (which I never did). I think they must get a commission on those things.

Katya - posted on 04/07/2013

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I had my last daughter at age 42. My middle one graduated from high school the same month of delivery and my oldest was born in 72! Having a child when I was older was a huge blessing. Yes I did worry when I read of the % of babies with struggles such as Down's but Flip those numbers to the positive in your mind. Instead of thinking 10% chance think 90% of having a baby without these struggles. And even if, they are all precious ,beautifully and wonderfully made gifts. Older mom's are more relaxed.They know how fast time slips by,so you walk a bit slower beside your little one, seeing the world slowly through a childs eyes again was amazing for me. I had difficult pregnancies when I was young and old. age made no difference.Take good care of yourself and savor every delightful moment. Its especially fun in public when we were out with our older daughter and were mistaken as the grandparents. We had a lot of laughs and funny situations. Be blessed and congratulations!

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Hi Sandra,
Where are you located? I would love to have a support group with women of my age. This is a really confusing time for me though....I'm a high school teacher with a 10 year fiance. We really thought I was going through the "change" for the last year or so. This is a complete suprise for the both of us.

Leah - posted on 04/01/2013

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Congrats. I am also pregnant with my 4th and am 40....mine are 10, 6, and 3. My suggestion is to ask for help if you need it! I try to take breaks when I can, and love having a house keeper every other week. I will also ask employees to help load purchases if they are heavy. All this because I'm tired, swollen, and carrying baby very low. I dont know that it has anything to do with age or just having three other kids to take care of, and it's also a challenge to carry baby so low.
Children are worth all the aches and pains....be patient with yourself and your family!

Chana - posted on 04/01/2013

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Congrats! I had my first almost 1 month after I turned 41 and my second 4 months shy of 43. I had no complications or problems accept the normal pregnancy problems. Both my girls were full term and healthy. Good Luck Chana

Sandra - posted on 03/26/2013

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Hello, my name is Sandra. I'm 42 yrs old,married 9yrs and 12wks pregnant with my second child. My first child is 7yrs old. I have yet to let my family know because I am worried of negative comments, not saying there will be. Just being pregnant right now I'm a bit worried. I've done tests and is waiting for results. I really don't have anyone to talk to as I don't really have close friends at this point in my life. I'm really looking for a support group.

Leslie - posted on 03/24/2013

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I had my first baby when I was almost 39 and my second when I was 40. They are 4 days shy of 18 months apart. I nursed my first for 12 months and was pregnant with my second for 3 of those months I caught the first egg with my second (totally was the plan.) I had no trouble conceiving at all. I got pregnant on the first try with my first and well like I said I caught the first egg with my second girl. I nursed my second for 14 and a half months. Other than have gestational diabetes with both they were normal pregnancies.

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I totally feel you! I live with my fiance. We say we are engaged but have never discussed a date or anything. We have been together over 10 years. We are very comfortable just the way we are and now this....

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OMG!!! I just found out for sure last night that I am pregnant at 44. This is completely out of left field for me at this time in my life. I am a full time teacher that loves to spend her summers traveling. I am also a grandmother. I really don't know if I have the energy required to raise another child. My oldest is 26 and married with one son and one on the way and my youngest is 23 and still trying to find herself. What in the world am I going to do!!!!!!

Antoinette - posted on 03/22/2013

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HI!!!!!

I'm Antoinette. I am a high school biology/anatomy teacher. My DH is a correctional officer, ex. military. I am new 40 (January). My hubby is 44. We have 3 kids, ages 9, 6, and 8 months....we are newly pregnant again, almost 5 weeks. Due November! Total surprise, but welcomed.

Quiet - posted on 03/19/2013

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I am a 41 yr old mother of six..one set of twins...all by my ex husband been with my fiance seven yrs..planned to get married next yr....I have had no symptoms of pregnancy until this wk.but discovered I'm ten weeks already....I am so nervous being this age and now starting over....I'm not sure how he's going to take this news

Eileen - posted on 03/15/2013

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Hi,
Congrats. I envy you! I had my first (and only) child when I was 42 so don't worry. You'll do great.

Lin - posted on 03/14/2013

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Hi everyone
I am a 50 year old mom with twins. I had a fantastic pregnancy natural birth and my twins and I went home after 3 days in the hospital. They are now 3 and a half years old and all is well. My other children are 30, 28, 26, 24, 22. Good luck anything is possible with God's blessing.

Lucia - posted on 10/12/2012

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Congratulations! First let me say that it is ok to be pregnant after age 40. There is no official cut-off date that we all must adhere to! I had my 8th at 40 and my 9th at 44. There were no complications-my body already knew what to do! Don't let anybody tell you that it is strange, wierd or uncommon. It has become more common in the last few years. Eat healthy, walk and keep a positive attitude! You can do it!

Jola - posted on 10/11/2012

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Hi moms!

I'm 41 ( had birthday just yesterday), i have had 4 mc, first one when i was 30 i've lost twins(30 wp), then at 7 weeks when I was 36, and 2 years ago at 17 wp, and last year at 13 wp.

I have one healthy daughter age 23, me and my partner we realy want to have a baby( especially me:))

Just wonder if any of you ladies have had a similiar exerience and finally have a healthy baby.

Kisses and hugs for you all.xxx

Anne - posted on 10/09/2012

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I just turned 45 and found out I'm 6 1/2 weeks pregnant. My midwife gave me an ultrasound and we saw a nice strong heartbeat. I'm really excited and nervous. We have been hoping to get pregnant again after last year's missed miscarriage, but we were just winging it. We figured if it's meant to be it will happen. I have a 22 year old daughter and a 16 year old son and this will be my husband's first child. Crossing my fingers this one sticks!

Linda - posted on 08/26/2012

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It has kept me younger and busy where the others my age are so ready for retirement and lazy. I dont have time. He is a junior in high school. Its wonderful!!!!!

Linda - posted on 08/26/2012

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I am 57 and have a 16 year old son. I have had more patience. I have enjoyed having him around as a single mom as well. It has its downs. Like the kids at school told him he had an old mom! I have been called his grandmother. Because all the other kids have young moms. I have four girls older. Oldest is 34. And i feel i was always so busy working to take care of them to notice a lot. And didn't have half the patience i do now. I had a very healthy pregnancy!

Tracy - posted on 08/23/2012

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Relax and enjoy. I had my 4th when I was over 40 (at 41). Don't feel like you have to do all of the extra testing, multiple ultrasounds, genetic tests, etc... They are optional and you are still young. I avoided them as they wouldn't have made a difference to me. I had a healthy, happy, wonderful boy who is now almost 6. Even though complications increase in women over 40, they are still not very likely to happen. Don't worry, enjoy, and take control of your own health and healthcare decisions. Good luck and congratulation! New babies are wonderful!

Ms Chocolate - posted on 08/16/2012

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This is very encouraging, I would like to have another baby and everybody tells you how dangerous it is when you are in your 40s ...I am glad I found this website.

Lila - posted on 01/17/2012

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Hi Cathleen,

My kids are 27, 25, 9 & almost 5. I was 43 when my daughter was born. We don't refer to her as a "surprise"; after 3 boys, she was a "shock"! I also have a 9 mo old grandson. My husband will be turning 50 this year but is one of those guys who is "well preserved". Congradulations on your newest addition. I don't know how well you feel during pregnancy, but when I was pregnant at 42 I knew my body wouldn't be able to handle it again, so my husband was gracious enough to get a vascectomy before I delivered. I hope your pregnancy and delivery are easy and you have a beautiful, healthy baby and mom.

Robin - posted on 01/17/2012

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I was 43 when I had my daughter Carlie. The birth itself I was nervous about. I had the amniocentesis done to make sure my baby was ok. I would have been prepared for any problems then. I know that raising a baby is great. I loved every minute of it. But, what the book leaves out is,mmmm

as you get older you go through changes. It makes you tired more easily. The kids that were babies turn into those hard teenagers. Of coarse we can handle them we have more patients than we use to when we were young. Keep strong and keep up your health. It is so important as they grow up. I had people in my family die. MY son, my father. My mom needed my help. I had a baby to take care of a grandson and a daughter with cancer. It was very difficult.

I had a young son, a two year old daughter and my grandson with me. I took my mom to the dollar tree store.

She kept asking how much is this? I kept telling her everything is a dollar mom. Finally, my little girl said to her, na na everything is one dollar. She said back to her in amazement .. everything is a dollar?

I don't know why I was getting annoyed. God sure was teaching me patience. She just couldn't believe everything was one dollar.

When she got to the register she pulled out her change purse with everything she had... She just was not feeling well since my dad died. I think she couldn't think about money or something. Maybe she couldn't count because she was upset inside... I pulled out a 20 and I paid.

All I am saying is that as your parents get older realize they are going to need need need you and before you know it you are going to want to rewind... because they will be gone.

My parents were at my house every single day after my baby was born. I had them over for soup and homemade bread often. They loved there grand babies. It gave them a reason to want to live everyday. '

My dad got to see his great grandson two times before he passed.

I think it is the bitter sweet... I wouldn't trade any moment. i want to rewind my life and do it again!!

I think my babies were the best part of my life..

I don't know where you live but I think my doctor was the best, They know so much now about having a baby when you are older. It was much easier than having the other ones. I was in labor for hours... no lie over a 24 hour day.

All day from 4 in the morning and daytime and back to night before she was born. They give you so much medicine you pass right by the first and second stage. They wake you up when it is time to push.. YOU better be ready for that work out.. He told me you better push or I am grabbing a plunger.. I was like what????? I was pushing.. It was rough and the pain was no different that the other babies. STILL i knew what to expect. I didn't fight it and just went with it.. I knew this too will pass... Then Carlie will be here.. MY diamond in the rough... robin

Darcy - posted on 01/16/2012

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This will be SO much fun for your family! It will make you relax more than you can ever know! My mom had her 5th at 42, and it was the best thing she ever did! (And that was back in the early 70's - people thought she was nuts!) She was completely relaxed raising him, and we all thought of him as our baby. He's the greatest man now! Totally together, fun, funny, and very confident. He really kept my parents young. They loved the energy he brought into the house when he was in high school. I'm so happy for you! Take good care of yourself! You need to milk this one!! :-)

Lori - posted on 01/11/2012

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Congrats on your pregnancy . I have four Children too. My last one I was age 43. Well I did seem to be more tired with him and I did have some scared moments but he was a healthy 8 lbs 6 oz. boy. He is very much a joy in our lives.My children are now girl-23 , girl-21, girl-17 and my boy is 3. As you can see this was a shock at the time. The advice to you is to not let things get you down and just hang in there. It will be all worth it in the end! Good luck .

Monica - posted on 01/11/2012

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I am turning 40 in March and want to have another baby. I have been on the fence for years because of how much a baby/child costs. My other children are 17 and 12 and I know everyone thinks I am crazy, but I have always wanted three and if I dont do it now, I am afraid I will regret it for the rest of my life. What do you think?

Melissa - posted on 02/20/2009

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Hi Cathleen - Congrats on your news!  I was 42 when I found out I was having #4  - 2 years ago.  I was shocked for a while.  However, our #4 is the best thing that ever happened to our family!  I can't imagine life w/o him! Your 13 & 9 year olds will be a huge help!  I had 12 & 9 year old boys at the time our son was born & a 5 year old girl - about the same as you.  They all still adore the 2 year old. 



My 4th pregnancy was rough, after the 1st 3 were so easy.  I think it was because my body was that much older.



Good luck & keep smiling!

Kim - posted on 02/20/2009

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"AMA" Mommy...advanced maternal age...mommy!  And on one of my ultrasounds, I saw the term "geriatric pregnancy"!!!???  HAHAHAHAHA!!! 

Becky - posted on 02/20/2009

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Hi there, congrads..you will be fine..I was 41 when I had my last child and was scared too death..I am 44 now and have 3 other children that are 22, 21, 13 all boys and last one which is 3 now a girl..She will definetly keep me young. Needless to say I am finished. Good luck to you and your husband. God bless you and your family.

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