Taking care of your elderly parents

Michelle - posted on 05/25/2012

Thank you much Renee - have a great weekend:) (My middle name is Renee - cool:)) lol

Renee - posted on 05/25/2012

Mom Douglas, I so relate to your post. My husband and I have been Married 30 years in Oct I had children by another marriage. So my husband adopted the kids they are now 35 yrs old and 32 yrs old We have 3 grandbabies. We have never been alone in our whole marriage, Our girls have moved out got married and Divorced and moved back home more than once, It is like one moves out as one moves in. Plus in between all this my whole side of the family has lived with us at one point or another. Plus all there kids when they got old enough to leave home and come live here with us. They all live in MO and we live in SC. It is a crazy way to live and we get so tired of it. But we can not and will not have are kids or grands out there not knowing if they are fine or not. I hope and Pray this helps you. Good luck to your Mom and Brother you are in my thoughts.

Michelle - posted on 05/24/2012

I'm 46 with my husband and 7 yr. old daughter. (both our second marriage). my parents are both in their 70's now and my mother had Parkinsons. Both my parents are "doing ok", and still able to get around - Ty God - although, things are beginning to change. My dad's response time with many issues has slowed, and we can see that he's "getting tired". The daily caring for mom is wearing on him, but, he's very stubborn and won't change anything. (fyi - they have living wills already in place so, us trying to "help" w/ anything is not a real possibility). My mom has also slowed down, her short term memory has decreased some, and she's now taking MANY medications. But, we thank God daily for their health ad strength. My reason for posting this - even though we visit my parents often, I find myself at times, doing everything I can to "block out" their declining issues. I cry at times but, rarely. It's REALLY hard to watch this all the time. ANY input of easy ways to get through all this would be greatly appreciated. (I'm a very sentimental person normally, and find the idea of group therapy/counseling - with two other HUGE changes happening right now in our lives (new wk. & relocating) very difficult on a reg. schedule, but not something I can easily do at this time. Thank you for your time and any input.

Sherry - posted on 03/29/2012

I took care of my mom at 59 and my stepdad at 62 and was by both their bedsides when they passed. It wasn't easy as I was away from my family for a long time. My mom and stepdad lived in Wisconsin and I spent the last months of their lives up there while my family was in Texas. I'm glad I did, though because it was precious time and it taught my family about sacrifice. Hang in there. You'll be glad you made the decision you have.

Faye - posted on 03/24/2012

I wrote a blog article on this very topic. Hopefully, it will be of some assistance to you.

http://nontraditionalcollegestudent.blog...

Jonell - posted on 03/17/2012

Yes I can. I've been married 6 years. Have my Father-in Law (79) moved in with us. After being married 1 yr. It is hard. It get weary, the worry and the crying wolf.



Tie a knot and hold on.

Lucila - posted on 05/11/2010

Hi Douglas I too took care of my mom she had colon cancer, But you know I stood by her until the day she died, I too had recently remarried but my mom was there for me when I needed her so I gave her the same treatment... If your hubby loves you it won't be any problem remeber you to will get old and will need someone to care for you too. (and I don't beleive in homes for the elders. So be there for her God will take care of you.

Donna - posted on 05/11/2010

I understand completely. I have been single for the past 20 years, my kids are 33, 30 and 24 and I have 5 grand kids. Almost 2 years ago we were told my mom had Alzheimers, in November of 2008 I moved her into my home along with my aunt who is legally blind. My mom is 87 and my aunt is 83. I use to go out with friends, now I can't even go to the movies with my boys. I am not complaining - I have time with my mom that none of my brothers or sisters will have and I have family that will fill in for me if I want to go out of town so my life has not come to a complete stop. Sometimes I regret the decission to move her in but usually only when I'm not feeling well, I have some chronic conditions that when they flair up I get cranky - but all in all, we work things out. I do get additonal help from hospice and in home senior services but they don't "grannysit". My 24 year old son will watch them so I can lay down or run to the store. I guess what I'm saying is that you can still have some time - you just have to make it. Have you contacted any of the local senior services to see if they can help a bit? Maybe you and your husband could have a "date night" and have someone come in to stay with your mom and brother. It is very late - 1:17 am, I am rambling on with this so I'm going to close but I would be more than happy to chat with you anytime you need to vent or just have someone to talk to.