is there any moms that suffer from mental health issues?

Jessica - posted on 11/03/2008 ( 21 moms have responded )

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i started a community blog for support not only for me, but for those who also feel alone. How can we take care of our children, if we can't help ourselves?

please join me in mental health issue among parents, but not the children...

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Crystal - posted on 12/10/2008

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all i would like to say is good job girls! and i am sure that you have all heard this before, but i will say it again, take it one day at a time as today is a gift, and if you don't take care of yourself first you can't take care of your kids, trust me i know, but i am learning this all over again after my second child was born. Good Luck and remember that children are the all forgiving and nobody is the perfect parent and it is even harder when you don't have a support system.

Christine - posted on 12/02/2008

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Hi, my name is Christine i have 3 children of my own and i have 2 step children i have been diagnosed with bipolor, borderline personality disorder and ptsd. if anyone would like to chat to me my email is my0406chooky0708@live.com please add me. i would like to talk 2 others with mental illness. thank you

Maureen - posted on 11/11/2008

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I have struggled with Depression my whole life. For years I had no idea that this is what was wrong. I have been on meds for about 5 years now and I feel a lot better. Sometimes we have to look around for the right answer and/or medication but keep looking and know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I also have a Masters Degree in Mental Health so keep writing and we will keep answering you....

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Therese - posted on 08/31/2009

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I, also, am bi-polar and it is hard trying to remain calm and normal in the face of raising children when you have this. My kids are all grown now and have lives of their own so I know it can be done, but I was hospitalized once. My daughter was hospitalized several times. I still watch my kids and worry about them and hope that they are ok. It's scary and very hard. People don't understand this illness if they don't have it, it isn't something that can be cured with a pill and one session with the dr. I get treated like I'm an idiot (and sometimes I act like I'm an idiot too) from my own family. I still get depressed and I'm 55 now. My sister-in-law recently told me that she thought I was 'cured' by now, and why was I still ill! It isn't something that can be cured ...it can be controlled though. I have to remember that there are good people out there that care about me and love me and that my life is important. If you feel you are alone there are organizations - like NAMI - that can help. If you are a single mom and barely making it, you can get counseling for free depending on your income. I'm sick of taking the medications and going through the zillions of doctors and therapists....some of whom need therapy themselves! I had one lady therapist tell me that she just quit listening when she was with her clients. Needless to say, we didn't go back to her. It's hard. Any suggestions on how to find a good psychiatrist?

Erinn - posted on 05/14/2009

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I get services through CMH and have for years now... get couseling and I also get my meds... I used to be embarassed about it, but now i'm realizing just how good its been being able to qualify for these services!! I need as much help as I can get!! I've been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and i'm on meds for both of them.... if it wasn't for my meds... if it wasn't for my meds i'd be in BIG trouble!! And so would my hubby and kids lol

Jessica - posted on 11/12/2008

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well i gone to therapy and it helps for like 30 mins and like what you said when i go home its starts all over again. buy the way lashing out on our partners, honesty sometimes i think they start it..lol (j.k) but yes i have came close to really seriously hurting him. i tried stabbing him when i lost control over myself and he was trying to help me. (long story) i also almost hurt my son when i was still pregnant with him, by trying to overdose on anti-depressants. (also another long story) but i came to the point that it scares me that i don't want to hurt anyone but those actions i did in the past reminds me that, thats not the person i am. i'm stronger then that. and i don't want to hurt anyone but myself, but at the same time even if i try to hurt my self the snowball effect hurts others and its not fair to them.Eloise, keeping walking away when things are to stress. from what i learned in group do other things that calms you down to cuz over doing the same thing can make matters worst. listen to the radio, take a hot shower just to relax your mind, and be mindful of something you enjoy and be in the moment of something you are doing. just for like a min. there are no worries no, doubt, just being focused on ur self when things get a little stressed. i don't know what a crystal healer is, but what ever works for you keep doing it.

Eloise - posted on 11/12/2008

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thinking about the kids smiles is what gets me through the day ive got to a point resently where im thinking the world can bugger of as long as my kids are happy thats all that matters

i still have to say go away from mummy for 5 mins every now and then and to my other half and ok they dont understand why alot of the time but they repect that they need to leave me alone and all call them when ive calmed down my 7 year old is very good sometimes he takes the others upstairs to play because he can see it building in me.



ive been very close to punching my other half b4 and it scared me so much so when i feel like it i say "if i dont walk away now im going to lash out!" i go upstairs and scream into a pillow. it helps me! lol



i started to see a crystal healer never thought it would help ( it was my mums idea) i come out with now worrys not a care in the world for about ten mins till i get home and it starts again but just leaving them and gettin away from the for a bit of me time really help!

has any one else tryed this

Jessica - posted on 11/12/2008

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Leigh, i feel the same way as you do. now that i'm being blessed with another child and i still feel guity that i'm not as happy as they are. i'm glad all you moms have support somehow though family and that is great. one thing that i just notice recently, when i take my son out to have fun like a park or just having him around other children, just to see his smile makes me all cheerful inside and i enjoy just being in that moment of knowing i'm places that smile on his face. i think that one postive note that i can say with being down on your self is what we do to make our child laugh, smile, giggle just to place that warm fuzzy feeling we get inside. do you agree?

Leigh - posted on 11/12/2008

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I stay at home with my 11 1/2 month old daughter. I feel sometimes like I'm the only one taking care of her and i have depression. I feel guilty for having depression. Why should I have depression when I have a beautiful happy child that I have been blessed with?It get's tough but my husband is very supportive and always trying to help out 1 way or another. He understands how I feel.

Jessica - posted on 11/11/2008

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thx guys i feel like i can talk to people and feel the same struggle that you guys are going threw. i just wish that there where more people around me that understands me at times when i need them.lol but i just wonder what tomorrow will bring when and if i can get some sleep tonight

Jessica - posted on 11/11/2008

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i only been on meds for 3 years and haven't been steady on them like i should. i was on zolof for a year and have and Prozac for the remaining, but since i'm pregnant they took me off of Prozac and put me on celexeia. i don't like the side effects it give me. i like Prozac better then it. i i wish i could get off of meds period and just do therapy alone. but i do need both. when i don't take my meds now i do feel like a yo-yo. but also i get very irritated with my parnter and i don't even mean to. it doesn't help that he wont seek treatment for his undignoise mental health issues. i try to ignore the best i can't, but then i feel like a loose cannan yelling at him for no reason, little things that he does irratetate me. i no its not good for the relationship and not for our child(ren). so how do you deal with that. i had offer to go to couple councling, he agreed to go at frist now he changed his mind that he doesn't want to go. it just fustrating me because i would like to funtional normal with out getting irritated over little things, i had fighting (never physical) period. i know he not in my head buts it hard. i see my therpist when ever i can, but with my son and hardly no support from him it is hard to stay steady like i wish to be. it also hard when you don't have family support to help out when you need it. i don't get that. i never go out with friends. i always stay in the house looking at four walls. and when i do go out its only when i have appts to go to. i'm not allowed to work on doctors orders (can't deal working with people long story) so i'm trying to get on ssi so i can help my family financially. i feel sick to my knees knowing i'm a burden sitting in the house not doing anything but raising my kid and soon our sec child. i get picked on alot from both members of our family. and it hurts cuz no one understands me they think i'm making excuses. its hard to explain to people you fear of doing things yourself, or go anywhere by your self with out looking over your shoulder. always afraid that history will reapeat it self. then at times it hard to make friends when no one really wants to hang out with me. if i want to take my son with me to go some where just for him plans get ruin all the time. i consistently wait for everyone but no one waits for me. i bend over backwards doing everything for them just to make them happy. then my partner and family members pressured me about the big J.O.B. and it sicken my stomach knowing that i'm not stable and affarid of doing something bad again. it what i always said in group "fearing the unexpected, afraid of not knowing" it upset me becasue of right now i'm not ready to face my fear. i want to be stable frist. i rather go back to college and finish what i had started then work. I don't want to hurt others around me, but i'm also tied of being blamed for things i can't control. so how do you guys cope with that?

Eloise - posted on 11/11/2008

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i've been on anti depressants for past natal depression on and off fr 7 years 3kids later theve told me to come of them cold turkey so at the mo im up and down like a yoyo

my partner is very good and understanding to a point but he is not inside my head! lol!!

im ok when im ok but once i've gone i loose control i have to walk away

Sally - posted on 11/09/2008

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Hi, I have suffered from depression for all my adult life. I have only recently been diagnosed as being Bi-polar. My family have said I am too much like hard work and have nothing to do with me, although they think they should still see my daughter, my fiances family is the same.
Things are very hard and lonely but my fiance is a great help and I love my little girl to pieces. During my pregnancy I attended an ante-natal depression group that focused on how your actions and feelings could affect your baby/child. This group was very helpful and showed ways of coping and keeping baby happy and social.
I still struggle and some days feel like hell but she is worth every minute. I now attend a depression group for mums and my little one attend the creche there, this is my only time away from her and it has been a life saver

Jessica - posted on 11/07/2008

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thanks for the input, when u right about mood changes, like mood swings, sometimes if things get to irritable around me i would start to snap out on everyone. I used skills from what i learned in group therapy. but its also hard to use the skills when someone like my partner would prevent me to use them. if you ever heard of DBT (dialectic behavioral therapy) its a great tool to have and it helps understand how ur mood is. for people who are bi polar its a great tool for them . we used to a chart to see how the day went the day before we went to group and we would discuss it. IF things wouldn't go right as you though, feed back from other people helped with suggestions they had is similar situations of what they did. I was great i miss being in there, i want to go back but the way my living situations is/are. i have to stop until i can find away to go back. but this also helps because in away i feel like i'm in group therapy talking to other people (just not face to face) who have kids and feel the same way as i do. I always wonder y so many people focus on kids with mental health issues, but never the parents. i see so many ads about kids with these health problems but never the parents. so i was curious y we don't see anything about parents with young kids, and how they handle it. so to me if feels nice and more relax to know that parents do care how their mental illness effects their kids as they grow up

Kristie - posted on 11/06/2008

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I am no expert but I have studied the field of mental health extensively. One suggestiong would be to write doen or have another family member write down your specific mood changes. I know you have heard this before but communication is the key. If you can recognize patterns or things that spark your moods then you can slowly alter your habits. I have ADD and if I have to much sugar or caffine I hit the roof. Well, as simple as it seems I was having a rough time controling it. I stopped eating fruits with lots of sugar in it and do not drink caffine except an occasional tea and it is amazing how well I feel. Also, eliminate stressors in your life. I know you can not just quit a job or get rid of an annoying family member but create a schedule and limit stressors in your life. About being scared you will pass it on we all freak out that our children will inharit our bad habits. The best way to fix that is to change your habits and read up on ways to creatively run your life.

Jessica - posted on 11/06/2008

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thanks so much for your responds, i just get so tired of not being able to connect with people who are in the same boat as me, to be supportive. and i think that one thing that people need to do to be supportive of one another and if its not there than we are lost and loose control over ourselves and others around us. its not fair to them, but at the same time how would they understand that its a little harder for us to go through life always worrying about the day(s) that comes.

Michele - posted on 11/05/2008

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I know how painful it can be to suffer with a mental disorder. If it were something that everyone could see, or if you could print out medical stats with a graph others could see just how bad one can feel. However, people often suffer in silence. Great move to start this. Kudos girlfriend!

Jessica - posted on 11/05/2008

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3 years ago, i got diagnose with depression, and borderline personality disorder. i was loosing control of myself, and now i have a healthy well active child who is two and one on the way. their are days when i can't even take care of my own child let alone myself. it hard for me to get support when there is no one supportive of you. i feel all alone. i don't want my son to have the same thing and it worries me that it will because depression does run in my family.
yes i am in treatment, but it not steady like i wish it was. things around me makes me have to stop doing treatments at times. and get back on horse when i can. If i can't take care of my self how can i take care of a child. so i make the effort to get make in treatment even though there are months apart.
the other thing that really ticks me off is that my son's father also has mental health issues and refuses to seek treatment. so i don't know how to deal with him (another topic on its own) i feel like i'm a disappoint to people around me and everyone has to remind me of what i'm not doing and that i need to do this. they have to treat me as a useless child and it hurts. i don't know what to do anymore and everyday with the criticism i get the more i think about my childhood of how alone i feel and distance from everyone. i want to enjoy life with my family and not feel i'm a disappointment to them.

Diana - posted on 11/05/2008

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I am a single mom that suffers from Bi-Polarity. It is challenging because sometimes my family just doesn't understand my mood swings. They think it's me just flying off the handle and don't realize that I have no control over it most times. This is very frustrating for all parties. If you have this problem, how do you handle it yourself??

Heather - posted on 11/04/2008

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So true! My husband is very supportive and is even being a stay at home dad working on his writing while taking care of our 6 month old. I am working half time for our school district as a music teacher and things are tough all the way around. Sometimes it just comes to the point where I have to stop and say, "You need to take care of our son right now because I can't." It's okay to not be there all the time. It's harder when you don't have anyone right there to help though. That's what people like me are here for. To talk to and vent to or whatever you need to reduce the stress of caring for those precious little ones of ours.

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