Mil

Denise - posted on 04/05/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My future mil isnt quite as bad as some that i have read on here but she drives me crazy none the less! it all began the first time i met her. this was 3 years ago when i was only 19 and her first question was when am i getting grandkids! that should have been a sign! well three years later i get pregnant and Future hubby and i are thrilled. the whole pregnancy she felt the urge to tell me what to do or not do. she is legally insane and has been hospitalized for her paranoia. the whole pregnancy all she could talk about is how she would be babysitting ect. i told the future hubby over my dead body will my child be left alone with her. well of course she got all mad when we did not call her as soon as we left for the hospital when i was in labor! we waited only because the doctors werent positive they were keeping me! we didnt call my family either! my aunt practically raised me and they helped us out a lot with getting ready for my son. they threw my baby shower bought our crib, my other aunt made me scrub tops to wear during my pregancy. i was always welcome for dinner if i didnt feel like cooking ect. his family did none of that. as a matter of fact a month before my due date his mil decided she needed to move up the road from us! whatever at least she doesnt drive i guess! well at the hospital i wanted my aunts to be the first ones in the room after to see my son. his mother barged in first! keep in mind my family is who brought cameras and things to take pictures for us! visiting hours were over in like 45 min at this time so the doctors were nice enough to allow everyone in at once because of this. now my family recongnizing that i was tired after being in labor all day and knowing that they would have to leave in a few min anyway left. plus they had to work unlike his family because they are on fixed incomes. well they say goodbye and i assume yay shes leaving! nope. somehow she got my room number before i knew where i was going and there she is waiting! of course the nurses then kicked them out becuse they had to go over a ton of medical stuff. so they came back in for 5 min before they had to leave. i was so annoyed by this. i made my future hubby call them and not let them come the next day untill he got there (he had to work so he could spend an extra day at home with me).

of course now that i have him she is always trying to guilt us into visiting her. this is after she bullied her way into hubbys grandmothers first visit with her great grandson. we stopped there on the way home from the hospital. during this visit while i was holding my 2 day old son she hit me on my arm hard enough to make hubbys uncle turn around and see what happened! i flipped out at that point! i outright told my future hubby that i do not trust her and i am not leaving him alone with her. he doesnt see all that i do. im at the point where i am not even really nice anymore.
lately thou i have to be because if i am semi nice hubby speaks up for me more often. !

sorry so long but i had to vent. she drives me nuts!! i know shes not as bad as some but i can only see it getting worse! she made me give my son to her when he was fussing because he had just gotten his shots and wanted me! of course he screamed and she didnt understand why! we had to go out to eat because it was her birthday. grrr!

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Chelsie - posted on 05/02/2010

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oh and the way i deal with the situation in my head while i am looking at her is a little something dr phil said, coz i only have to deal with her once or twice a year, he sez u can stand on ur head twice a year. its not that hard. so i know it sound stupid but when i start getting irate about having to deal with her i say outloud, i can stand on my head twice a year, my man thinks i am insane and is like ok u can stand on ur head thats good huni.........are u feeling ok> lmao. wotever helps

Chelsie - posted on 05/02/2010

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wow, sounds abit like mother in law. mine is also nuts, although she hasnt been admitted only bcoz she had 3 small boys whos dad had vanished nd no one else to look after em. she done pretty much the same thing as ur mil when i had my daughter. i didnt want her at the hospital AT ALL. so she barges up smelling of pot, booze and cigarettes with 2 sick kids in tow, snatches my baby off me and is goin on about how she will be having her lal the time, um dream on bitch. then after her son rings her nd tells her to not come back up she comes up again, and again with 2 sick kids. i had to giv my child her first bath bcoz she smelled of drugs and booze, i cried myself to sleep bcoz of that. so my child is now 19 months and omg i have had to deal with so much bullshit coz of this woman. me nd my partner have split about 7 times since i fell pregnant coz of her. (he is a bit of a mummys boy) when we told her about the pregnancy she yelled out how she was to young to be a g/mother, and what a huge mistake it is. yeah great i know. then i tell my man all thru the pregnancy that i dont want her at the hospital or to come anywhere near me for the first 2 weeks but neither was anyone else cept my mother coz i was very ill nd needed mum to give me injections. but no, she just keeps rocking up at rediculous hours yelling in my driveway that she needed her son to go buy her some drugs. bullshit ay. then when i told hubby i didnt want her near my child he went mental and we split up and spat all over me tellin me i was scum, fantastic isnt he. then we cam to an agreement, of once a month for half an hour if she abided by a set of rules and then went as soon as the half an hour was up. but she didnt do as she was asked so i limited it again to once every 2 months for half an hour, but again she didnt do as she was asked, so i stopped them all together. we split again on and off for about 9 months then when my daughter was 10 months old she sent me documents as an attempt to try and get weekly vistations for over an hour each time. so within 24 hours i had moved towns without my child father, i told him to get fucked and left.i moved in with my 2 brothers so him and his mother wouldnt try her shit. he came to his senses and moved to the same town as me and somehow i got him to agree to once a yr for only 1 hour visit or twice a yr for half an hour coz i cant deal with her and she is mental.and the visits are always to be in a public place. also, she never ever gets my address or my fone number. she has his mobil and that is it. i had to put my foot down he had to realise his mother is mental. and after about 5 months of living in different towns and him having to travel 300kms to see us once a week he realised that it was bcoz of his mother being a selfish bitch that he had to do that and had to live away from his girls. so he moved down here and we got another house, then his fucken sister moves in. i freaked out at 1st thinkin she was gunna be her insider then i told her that if anything from this house including fotos or gossip, EVER get to that woman i will kick her fucken arse out so quick she wouldnt believe it. now we are about to halves in a business and move to the upperclass side of town so things are looking up and even tho i hav to deal with her for like an hour in a few days and the steam will be pouring out my ears and it will take everything i hav to not rip her from limb to limb, i gotta just bite my lip coz in the end i have the upper hand and i am the one who will be living the good life in a few weeks and hav woteva, while she is still a single mum with 6 kids to 3 different men and the guy she has now hits her and she still bashes her kids and is a mental druggo but i will always have wot she wants. dont get me wrong tho, it has taken me fucken ages to get to this point and i think mine hurt so much coz we used to be really close then when me and her son moved in 2getha she freaked out and started rocking up at some ungodly hour while he was on graveyard shift, screaming in my driveway at what a slut i am and how she was gunna slit my throat. haha, good luck with yours but i would say put ur foot down, it was so hard for me but it had to be done for my little girl

Tracey - posted on 05/01/2010

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wow! seems to me like you have your hands full, but then again so do i. my MIL drives me crazy and the sad thing is i live with her. i also have a 5 yr old daughter and my son is due in July. like i have told many other wives with MIL problems, talk to your husband. i have had many upon many talks with my husband over the past few months and he has told me that when i talk to her to think it out. make sure i know what i want to say and think of what her responses might be. also for me to keep up with my stuff around the house and everything else that way i have more leverage. so lately i have been doing my list of chores even when i am feeling ill, i make sure if i cook in the kitchen that when i have finished eating that i clean up the dishes. i even clean up really everyones breakfast and lunch dishes. i have been making sure since i am a stay at home mom that i am on top of my stuff and then some. its been a lot of help for me, cuz when she goes off the deep end, she looks bad and i get defended.

i mean she has no right to expect you to allow her to babysit if she is nuts. plus what is up with hitting your arm while you are holding a 2 day old infant. hello that is way out of line. i mean MIL's are there to drive you nuts. but talk to your husband and really go over what is bothering you.

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