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Does anyone else find it difficult..........

Amy - posted on 08/10/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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We live in a fairly affluent town, where there are two major hospitals with many doctors who live in the area. An Ivy League school. And a good bit of old money floating around. One of the local YMCA's is where alot of these kids play sports. Our children also play at this Y, since it is the closest to our home. I found it difficult at first to relate with the parents, especially the mothers, since most of them are stay at home Moms with nannies and I am a working mother with 3 kids and a middle class artsy type life style. The kids are great and don't really seem to notice the "class difference". But alot of times, even though I am pretty out going, I seem to always be left out of the conversations regarding snack and games etc. The funny thing is I work with alot of there husbands at my job, at the hospital, and they are very kind to me and always speak to me during games and practice. But the wives seem to be very resistant to getting to know me.I have to be honest, it does hurt my feelings a bit, any suggestions on how to cope with this? Any suggestions on convo. starters or ice breakers with these women. Any advice would help. Thanks!!!

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2 Comments

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Jessica - posted on 11/06/2009

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36

It's not a professional opinion or anything, but being a Mom when you start talking about your kids and asking about theirs ("Do your kids do this, have they ever had/done this?") and whatnot is usually a great ice breaker with other Moms since every good Mom loves talking about their kid! Also, keep in mind they may think the same about you, or just be a little intimidated. I've been in both the stay at home and working mother situation and as a stay at home one feels their efforts may always go unrecognized because they don't get paid for it or their efforts are not seen in the public eye, and some may feel just because one stays at home that they are unchallenged in their environment or unfit in the workplace. As far as the working mother goes she may envy stay at home mothers and that envy may or may not be misunderstood by others. She sees herself as working all day long to make money for her family just to come home and continue on to her "2nd job" and never getting a break. Both sides can be intimidated by the other for different reasons, usually keeping them in separate cliques. I just say keep trying to break through the clique if you think they are worth knowing, show them your Mommy side and that you love your kids just as much as they do! Recognize where they are coming from being stay at home moms and they may just recognize your efforts as a working mom.

Good luck!

Cheri - posted on 09/10/2009

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Ha, maybe they're aren't worth knowing? I was a foster parent for 72 special-needs kids, adopted my first (tried unsuccessfully to adopt most of them), specialized in drug babies, and was discriminated against by the kid's families (therefore the kids were difficult), by my foster agency, by the county social workers, even by churches!!!

Until I found a great church who actually helped me with these kids and became famiy to us. I quit fostering and am currently trying to adopt again (because all 71 of my kids went back home to the same environments they had originally removed from!!!!

Now I write family-friendly parenting articles on kids arts & crafts, science & reading for toddlers, family activities, holidays and behavorial solutions for moms like us! Published on AssociatedContent.com search Cheri Majors, M.S.

I love everyone's input!

God bless,

Cheri

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