Should my son have a regular bedtime?

Shannon - posted on 02/03/2009

Hi i have to say having your children in a routine is good for every1, but you should also do what is best for your family.. Our boys went into a routine from very early.  But with #1 it went out the window when i returned to work several nights a week.. But once i started maternity leave for the 2nd time i made sure that every1 stuck to the routine from early in the day.. we wake usually about 630-730am then drink, breakfast and play till about 10am then nap time, usually for about 2 hours.  when they wake from nap time its lunch and then playtime, dinner is at 530-6pm then bath and playtime till usually 7-730 then it is off to bed.. the only time that we are out of our routine is if we are out for the night and if we are needing to go out during the day then nap tim is as soon as we get home... Our routine works great for us, but as I said you need to make 1 that will suit your life and your baby will learn to adapt.. my 14 month old has had this routine since he was 4 weeks old.. works a treat..

hope this helps you

Elisha - posted on 01/28/2009

Quoting Lauren:

Should my son have a regular bedtime?

My son sleeps through the night 99 percent of the time and gets the right amount of sleep, but sometimes he's not sleepy 'til really late at night. Especially when we have guests, he'll just cry and cry if we try to put him down. Most nights lately he's not sleeping until 9:30 or so. I think he goes to sleep later when he has several naps. Does it matter what time he goes to bed? Is it important I set a specific bedtime whether he's tired or not?

Hi Lauren, my son is just starting to do the same thing.before he was a seven to seven baby on the dot without a doubt and now over the past couple of weeks he refuses to go to bed at 7pm, he is just not tired, lately ive had to hold him till he goes to sleep (which is only about 5min) which is about 8-8.30pm.he fights it so bad!!!he usually has a good 1 1/2 sleep inthe morning and 2hrs in the afternoon, im currently trying to cut back his morning sleep to a minimum of 45mins and letting him go to bed earlier in the afternoon so he wakes at about 2.30-3pm.it's only been acouple of days and he does really well during the day, but he still fighting the nights.i dont know if this will work for u lauren but u can always give it ago, im still trying so if u get any other ideas pass them on would be great!!!all i can say is im just glad that once he is asleep i dont hear from him till the morning and he is still a happy boy which i'm sure yours is too.good luck!!

Elisha

Billie - posted on 01/27/2009

I also have a son 14 months old and while we do keep a regular bedtime it is also around 9-9:30. He sleeps through the night, and has 1 2-4 hour nap at the same time everyday. All I have to say is "is it time for bed" and he picks up his blankie and heads for the stairs. The time you put him down I don't think is relevant but I do think a routine is. Children crave the familiar. As long as he is getting right number of hours of sleep in a day your doing just fine. Good Luck.

Stacey - posted on 01/27/2009

My daughter is on the "sort-of-schedule." Some nights she sleeps really well, sometimes not. She has eczema and bad food allergies, so she hasn't always slept well. My daughter goes to bed between 8:30-9:30 p.m.(sometimes later, sometimes earlier) It all depends on how tired she is! She likes to sleep in and go to bed later, that is just her. Most days we have to wake her up at 8 a.m. to get to work. She take one long nap in the middle of the day. If I think she is going to get tired early, I give her her bath earlier at night, and then we play for a little while. When I can tell she is getting tired, I make her bottle and we either read books or she goes right to bed after her bottle. I think that if your son is not tired until 9:30 p.m., there is no point in forcing him to go down earlier. If he wakes up happy and rested, and he is happy during the day, you have nothing to worry about.

Cynthia - posted on 01/27/2009

we've always struggled w/ "schedule". our dr. however, said as long as they're content and happy during the day, things should be okay. my daughter used to be a good sleeper as a newborn. now at 14 months, we do struggle w/ getting her to sleep since we co-sleep most of the time. on the most part, i try to get her to sleep by 9-ish. she's up usually by 7 when i work or i wake her up to get her ready. other than that, she could sleep until 8-9am! naps are a bit of a struggle too but she usually gets tired around noonish and is down for an hour.

Vanessa - posted on 01/26/2009

Our family has a crazy schedule, My husband works second shift and I take night classes, so my son doesn't have a great bedtime routine. Sometimes he's in bed by 7, sometimes not until 10. However, he sleeps, eats, take naps, and behaves and he's adapted to our busy schedule. Just do what works for your family.

Jennifer - posted on 01/26/2009

I found the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth to be very helpful. If I put Tyler down any later than 6:30 he will wake up extra early in the morning or he will wake up during the night. I say that a regular bedtime is the best, but it is ok to be flexible within an hour's timeframe.

Crystal - posted on 01/25/2009

I believe in child led scheduling. Babies know when they are hungry and tired and I don't believe in forcing my children to sleep or eat when they are not hungry or tired. That said, all three of my kids, 4 1/2, 3 and 1 all go to bed between 8-9pm every night. Having your kids on a really strict schedule will make it really hard for them to adjust to new things, but having them on no schedule can mess them up too. You just have to find the happy medium that works for your family.

Ilse - posted on 01/25/2009

I don't really care about routine or schedules. I put my daughter to bed when I see that she is sleepy. Somehow, this is usually at almost the same time every night, around 8pm. She sleeps 12hrs a night. Same with daytime naps, if she starts yawning at 11am, I put her to bed. If she doesn't want to sleep till 2pm, that's fine too. She is a very happy, easy girl so I believe this is the best way for us, but everyone has their own way of dealing with things.

Mary - posted on 01/25/2009

I'm a huge fan of routine so I would say yes but I think it really depends on what works best for you and your son.  Our little boy is 14 months now and he gets up around 7am, goes for a nap about 9 for approx 1 hour, then has another nap from 1 until approx 3. He goes upstairs at 6.15ish has his bath, bottle then bed.  He's usally in bed by 7 which is great as my husband & I get to spend a few hours together. I always said I wasn't going to have a routine but am so glad we do have one.  Its good for our little boy to know whats happening and when and its nice for us to know as well. It'll take time to get into a routine but is definitely worth the effort! Good luck!

Heather - posted on 01/23/2009

I think routine is a major necessity! I have had my son on a routine since he has been about 4 months. bedtime at 930 everynight. and a nap around noon. the same everyday and when you mess the routine up he is not a very happy camper.

Lynn - posted on 01/22/2009

I had this problem while back. I put my son on a schedule. only letting him nap during certain times and never after 3pm. that way he is ready for bed between 7:30 and 8pm.

Jane - posted on 01/22/2009

Hi, my son has also had a bedtime routine since the age of about 4 or 5 months old. I also heard that if they go to bed early they are more likely to sleep through the night and that has always been the case with my little boy. He has his dinner about 5pm then a bath at about 6.15pm, bottle at 6.45pm and then straight to bed for about 7pm. He sleeps through the night and wakes at about 8.00am. We obvsiously have the odd occasion when his routine is disrupted, but I always find if he goes to bed later, he will have a restless night. He has just started to cut out his morning nap and will sleep for about an hour mid afternoon. I like having a routine as it gives me time to myself in the evening after looking after him all day, but I dont think it is essential for them until they have to go to playschool or nursery and need a good nights sleep to keep up with the other kids! I think if you want him to go to bed early and can put up with a few evenings of crying they normally get the idea pretty quickly it you stay firm. Good luck what ever you decide.

Rachel - posted on 01/21/2009

We have had our son on a bedtime schedule with about a 7-7:30 bedtime (with bath and books) since he was about 3-4 months old. By that point he was taking an evening nap around that time and so we just started making it bedtime instead of a nap. But I know that not all children and not all families and routines are the same so please read my comments bearing that in mind. I had heard from a friend with children, before my son was born, that putting your child to bed earlier helped them sleep better and longer at night. Now you don't seem to be having a problem with him sleeping through the night once he gets to sleep but if you could start that routine he might get more sleep at night an not have to have so many naps through the day. My son just started the move to one nap a day. We had a few days where for whatever reason we had to miss his morning nap and he didn't break down like he used to, or start rubbing his eyes. Now that we just do one nap around 12:30 he sleeps for an hour and a half without waking up which is leaps and bounds better than the 2 half hour naps he used to take, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. Plus he is really sleepy at night and goes down much easier. I know that changing a routine is not easy but you might try a week or two of fewer daytime naps and hope that it makes him more tired at bedtime. And like someone else said he will test and test you and you will I am sure have lots of crying but if you are ok with that I would give it a try. I go back and forth about when and if I should just let my son "cry it out" and have decided that it is just a personal thing, whatever you feel comfortable with. Good luck!!!

Kristin - posted on 01/19/2009

I too believe in a good schedule. I know everyone has read that babies crave schedules...they really do and I've come to understand more ever since Hannah Grace was around 6 months old.

My husband and I are really good about getting setting her dinner time at 4:45, play time, bath at 5:30 and she's in bed by 6pm. She'll sleep until 6:10-15 the next morning straight. Now that she is 14 1/2 months she takes one nap and that may be the difference. She goes down at 11:40 until around 2pm.

Our pediatrician and some of our friends with more than one child thinks that children this age taking one nap helps them go to sleep for the night earlier and stay asleep.

I'm sure doing this new routine would take time but in the end it will allow you to keep your sanity, have a bit of time to yourself earlier in the evening and allow your child to get into a good, healthy routine that will last into his future.

Jennifer - posted on 01/19/2009

I am a very scheduled person and like to know what to expect, so I'm going to say yes.  However, I believe it depends on what is best for you and your son.  If it's working out not having a bedtime then I wouldn't worry about it. 

I will also say though, that I've heard children like similar routines.  From very early on, once my daughter started sleeping thru the night, we had a bedtime routine.  She would have her bath, bottle and I would rock her to sleep.  Once we cut out the bottle, she took her bath and we would just lay her in her crib to fall asleep on her own.  I'll admit, it wasn't easy listening to her cry but we stuck to our plan and it worked!  Within the week she was falling asleep on her own.  We made sure to do everything at the same time.  Now, she's on a wonderful schedule.  6 is dinner, after dinner we go play until about 8.  8 is bathtime and she is bathed, dressed and in her crib by 8:15-8:30.  We put some toys in there and she usually plays and falls right asleep within minutes.  Now of course, she will have her moments but I think the key is sticking with your plan.  Don't let your son test you and make you give in.  I guarantee you will have a much happier bedtime routine!  Best of luck!