Ready to stop co-sleeping

Brandi - posted on 06/09/2010 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My son is 19 mths and has been sleeping with us since birth. My husband and I are ready to get our bed back. He will not sleep in his bed he'll play in it but won't lay in it. If I place him in it after he falls asleep he may sleep an hour and wake up and won't go back to sleep until you take him out the room completely. How do I get him to fall asleep and stay asleep in his bed?

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Clara - posted on 07/09/2010

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You might be ready to stop co-sleeping, but he is not. At this stage they go through a second phase of separation anxiety, when their worlds are not ok without mommy, this is a special part of their lives and they learn the wonderful lesson of trust.

We trust our daughter and follow her needs.

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Karen - posted on 06/25/2010

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It might be worthwhile to wait a bit if you're wanting to make a gentle tearless transition. Most of my reading indicates kids tend to transition on their own between 2-3yrs. Could you enjoy the sleep-sharing for a while longer and then make the transition slowly?
And I agree with Emily, talk to him about it. You never know, if he got to choose a new paint colour or bedding or something, he could be all for sleeping in his own room.

Doneisha - posted on 06/25/2010

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I had the same problem with my then 13 month old. We have a crib but she would not sleep in it, now we have a 6 month old I'm going to start sleeping in his crib. But if you have other small kids, let him sleep with them. It worked for us! She now goes to bed on her own.

Emily - posted on 06/24/2010

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Talk with him about it. Kids his age can understand a lot more than we give them credit for. I just transitioned my 19mo old boy into a toddler bed and his 4mo old sister in the crib so they share a room. I was pretty hesitant, but I spent time explaining things to him. I told him that if he heard the baby at night it was ok and mama would come and take care of her, that he could just go back to resting. Miraculously it worked!! Try reassuring him through ways that he can understand.

Sheila - posted on 06/24/2010

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Put him in his room at night and shut the door. Let him cry it out. It could take a week to a couple of weeks.

Brandi - posted on 06/10/2010

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I have tried that, I have let him sleep in my shirt, with a blanket I sleep with for a few nights. I've even given him my pillow I've had since I got pregnant with him. I think its the physical contact he looks for but I don't know how to get him out of that.

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Hi! I agree with Zoe! He has had 19 months to get used to sleeping a certain way in a certain place. Make sure he has the same blanket he used in your bed and the same kind of "set-up". If he was on a blanket/under a blanket....Try putting him in the crib just for naps first. It may take some time to get in it full-time. We let our boys "cry it out". Going in and checking on them every 10 mins. or so. It is reassuring to them that you are still there. We also use some soft music in their room! Hope this helps :)

Zoe - posted on 06/10/2010

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He could be waking up because he can't smell you anymore so you could try putting something of yours like a blanket that you have recently used on his bed so it has your scent on it.

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