school & work

Atiyah - posted on 03/27/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am a single mother trying to get back into the work field and go back to school to finish my degree.. I

n the town where I live I am all by myself my

closest family member is almost an hour away and my

parent are an hour an a half away and my parents offered to care

for my son for the year for me so I can go to school work full time plus get a part time job.

But I have ixed feelings about that because I dont wannabe with out my baby #1,

#2 how will he feel about that?, #3 though, since Im up here by myself then that means

besides school he will always be in daycare or such I mean if I am working two job and

going to school I will never see him besides if he is in daycare all the time then thats jus

more money im putting out...What should I do?

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Veronica - posted on 03/27/2009

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Is there any way that you could go to school online and limit your time away from home as much as possible.  I know it can be difficult sometimes to do this depending on your degree, but it is an option.  Good luck finding a job out there

Veronica - posted on 03/27/2009

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  YOur decision sounds like it would be a very hard one to make.  I have a few questions for you, How long would you be in school?  Where is the babys father or his family and if they are in the picture could they watch the baby while you are busy at school and work?  If not I think if school is going to bring you to a better place where you will only be working one job then I think you should look for a daycare that you love so that you would be able to see your child everyday and still do what you gotta do so that you can support you and ur baby in the longrun.  I don't think that I could be away from my daughter for longer than a week at a time so even though taking the baby to your parents or other family member may seem like a more feesible option you may not be able to do it.  Also have you asked your parents to possibly help you out with daycare payments until you are done with school?  Even if you dont think it is an option it never hurts to ask.  You'd be surprised what ur parents wouldn't spend on you as a child but what they will do for their grands!  I hope this helps a little and if you want to talk more give me a shout.

Atiyah - posted on 03/27/2009

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Thank you so much for your support!..Just the thought of giving up my baby to my parents for a whole year made me feel lik I was bad parent. But as it is already I just lost my job 2 months ago so Im looking for work again and I figured its already financially a struggle and daycare after school and at night would just be an extra burden on my pockets... I only have one child so I don't know what to do parenting doesn't come with a manual I just want to make the right decision..



 



Thanks for your response.

Veronica - posted on 03/27/2009

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  YOur decision sounds like it would be a very hard one to make.  I have a few questions for you, How long would you be in school?  Where is the babys father or his family and if they are in the picture could they watch the baby while you are busy at school and work?  If not I think if school is going to bring you to a better place where you will only be working one job then I think you should look for a daycare that you love so that you would be able to see your child everyday and still do what you gotta do so that you can support you and ur baby in the longrun.  I don't think that I could be away from my daughter for longer than a week at a time so even though taking the baby to your parents or other family member may seem like a more feesible option you may not be able to do it.  Also have you asked your parents to possibly help you out with daycare payments until you are done with school?  Even if you dont think it is an option it never hurts to ask.  You'd be surprised what ur parents wouldn't spend on you as a child but what they will do for their grands!  I hope this helps a little and if you want to talk more give me a shout.

Veronica - posted on 03/27/2009

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That's a lot to handle, but it's good to hear that you want a better life for you and your child. 



I'm not a single mom.  I'm an Army spouse.  My husband was deployed to Iraq and I was home alone with 2 small kids.  I didn't have to work, but I did and I went to school full time.  I was working on my bachelors, and pregnant with my third.  I my nearest family was 7 hours away and my parents 10 hours away. 



I had to leave my kids in daycare.  You on the other hand (and this is only a suggestion), can leave your baby with your parents during the week and go visit on the weekends or every other weekend. 



Your child, if he remembers your absence, will understand that it was all for a better future for both of you. 



 



In your situation, you have to sacrifice something.  You either deal with not seeing your baby everyday (you can always webcam if he's old enough) or you sacrifice your future.



It's hard to find good daycares, too.  You might have better peace of mind knowing that your parents or family will actually take care of your baby. 



 



Another thing is, that if you're working 2 jobs and going to school full time, will you be spending quality time with your baby or going from A to B like a robot.  Just something to think about.  It'll be less stressful for you to not have him, as bad as that may sound, while you concentrate on your future.



 



Good luck with your decision, I understand the difficulty.



 



Veronica



Mommy of 4

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