Andrea - posted on 01/04/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )
My daughter is just over 4 years old now. Whenever I arrive to get her from daycare or Grandma's house or wherever she is, she loses it. Huge tantrums. Screaming, crying, rolling on the floor, removing and throwing her shoes. At first, ignoring them worked pretty quickly. She would eventually get her shoes and coat on and we'd leave. But the fits started lasting longer and longer. Now, if the daycare provider and I ignore the tantrums, she progresses to spitting on or hitting or kicking other kids because she knows that behavior can't be ignored. I work full time outside the home, and picking up my two children (I also have a 2.5 year old son) in the afternoon has become a dreaded task for me, which is not right. Leaving work is more stressful than being at work because I know what I am going to walk into. And no matter who has been watching her says she's been wonderful all day until I show up, which just makes me feel great. :/
Her behavior is progressively getting worse and worse. There are much smaller kids than her, including a 7 month old at her daycare and I'm afraid she will hurt someone smaller than her. This behavior can no longer be ignored and I have to do something. So far I have not found a reward with enough value to keep her from acting out for more than a day, and consequences like losing a privilege or toy do not phase her at all. Any suggestions?