bed times

Maria - posted on 03/05/2009 ( 15 moms have responded )

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hi ive been wondering if im a terrible mother. any time i tell anyone what time my baby goes down for the night, i get weird looks, like "really? that's not right".



since he was 6 weeks old my son has been sleeping for about 7-9 hours a night. only thing is, he usually doesnt go down for the night until around 10-11 pm. i have tried putting him down earlier but he will just wake up and stay awake no matter what.

I am on a baby-led schedule, and i believe he will go to sleep when he is good and ready to go to bed.

Due to guilt i have tried to start putting him on a more parent-led schedule, giving him a bath and a book, then a feeding starting at 9 pm, to try to move him bedtime back a little, he has gone to bed a few times around 10:30 and once around 9:30, but it just doesnt seem to really work and i don't really mind

but should i try to impose an earlier bedtime?

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Jillian - posted on 03/07/2009

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There is no right or wrong. My twins who are now 5 months go to sleep between 9 and 10:30. It works for us. We are on the same schedule - baby-led. My younger twin usually starts her bedtime routine around 8:30 pm and once she is asleep I lay her down to sleep. The older twin starts between around 9:00 pm. My mom tells me that it is fine - especially if they sleep through the night. My mother-in-law does not approve but never watches them. I wouldn't worry about what anyone else says - this is your child and you should do what it is best for you.

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Diane - posted on 03/10/2009

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My daughter started a month ago sleeping from 6:30pm-till 7am 12 hrs at a time. I believe she sleeps thinks long b.c she just became a thumb suckers, so she is able to sooth herself back to sleep. Be4 she knew how to suck her thumb she would wake up and cry so i would give her a bottle. Now she doesn't need a bottle all she needed was to learn how to soothe herself.. I recommend reading the book 'Healty Sleep Habits, Happy Child'. It's a quick read, and very helpful.

Beth - posted on 03/10/2009

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My son is 5 months old, and he has been going to bed at 11:30pm (ish) since he was about 7 weeks. I believe if he is tired, he will sleep. I dont normally go to sleep until gone 12 anyway so I dont mind; plus he sleeps through until about 10 in the morning.

I tried bath, story bedtime - but I feel at this present time he is too young to understand.

If he seems happy then go for it - as long as both of you are well and sleeping fine then noone should worry !

Liza - posted on 03/10/2009

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I'm one of the VERY lucky ones as Mackenzie is usually in bed, and asleep by 7:30pm, and sleeps until 7:00 or 8:00am.  She'll wake up a couple of times to find her soother between 7:30 and 12:00, and will start the soother search around 6:30 or so, but usually doesn't actually wake up until 7:00 at the earliest.  She put herself on this schedule and is now (even with the time change) wanting to go to bed around 6:30, I keep her up until 7.

Dona - posted on 03/10/2009

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I am a stay up late, sleep in kinda person so my 5 month daughter goes to bed anywheres from 9 till 2 and she usually sleeps for about 12-13 hours waking up once or twice to eat. I personally don't think there is nothing wrong with it. Whatever works for you and your family.

Danielle - posted on 03/10/2009

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My son goes to sleep somewhere between 9-10:30 everynight. I don't think that there is anything wrong with letting him fall asleep when it works for him. Especially if he is sleeping through the night. I do the same thing. Keep it up!

Maria - posted on 03/09/2009

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thanks so much to everyone that replied. i feel much better about my choices after a little reassurance that im not alone...



i try to let looks and criticism roll off me, but sometimes it gets a little much, and you just wonder, you know?

Kassie - posted on 03/08/2009

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My son just turned 5 months and that is exactly like him most nights. I let him sleep and eat when he wants and it works for us. He didn't use to go to bed until 10-11 either. I would feed him right in that time frame and then he would sleep until like 6 sometimes 7. He is going through some schedule changes on his own right now,but if he works his way back to going to bed at 10 or 11 again I would be okay with that. I think it works so well for me because that is when I like to sleep to.

Sherree - posted on 03/07/2009

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LOL. My baby didn't get put down til 1 or 2 am for her first 3 months. Apparently it is common for them to have day-right reversal because in the womb they are awake while you are sleeping and sleeping while you are up moving around, rocking them to sleep. So my daughter was about half reversed. Over Christmas holidays, she somehow got going to sleep by 11 pm. I was so pleased. But now it seems to be getting later again - the past week I couldn't get her to sleep until 1 am again. I think it may be due to me trying to schedule her naps during the day and maybe making her nap too much and too close to bedtime. I personally am quite happy if she goes to bed at 11 pm because then she sleeps in til 9am and that is perfect for our lifestyle. I would hate to have to get up at 6:30 am with her - I hate rising early.

Brooke - posted on 03/07/2009

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If you want to change that, I was told to start waking up the baby, a bit earlier every morning till, hes on a earlier schedule.

Katie - posted on 03/07/2009

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I don't think you should worry what everyone else says, you should do whats best for you and your baby. I think a baby of 5 months cannot be expected to sleep from 7pm - 7am (although some lucky mums have babies that do!) Our daughter doesn't sleep through yet but she will sleep late afternoon till mid evening and then goes back to bed about 8.30 pm and wakes again about 11 - 11.30pm for a feed and again at about 2 or 3am. I think you are right to go along with your baby. At this age they are too young to put into too rigid a timetable.

Lisa - posted on 03/06/2009

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I don't think that is a bad thing that he goes to bed at 10 or 11, if he seems to be getting good sleep and sleeps through the night I don't see what the harm is. I wish my daughter slept through the night. She's almost 5 months old and she still wakes up 1-2 times a night. We are just the opposite of you, we have tried to keep her awake longer in the evening 1 so we can spend more time with her when we get home from work and 2.  so she would maybe sleep through the night and wake up when we have to get up for work, but no such luck, she wants a nap around 6pm when we get home and then she is up for ahwile and goes to bed about 9 or 9:30 and normally wakes up about 2 or so takes a bottle and goes back to sleep until around 6 or so.  I think evrey child is different and as long as they are happy and healthy and getting what they need I don't believe there is any set rule, or method that we as parents need to follow.

Denise - posted on 03/06/2009

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My daughter goes to bed anytime between 10 and 12. I thought the same thing but it works with my schedule and i think thats fine. im sure when she gets older I will get her to bed sooner.

Amber - posted on 03/05/2009

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If it works with your schedual I wouldn't worry. I'm always up that late anyway. My son gets very grumpy & he's ready for his bed at 9:30 on the nose, it's werid, and he's down till 8 the next morning. But that works with my schedual because after he's down I'm tring to get my toddler to chill out and go down too. You could try getting him up earlier in the morning or cutting a nap short so he's tired earlier in the evening, but he'll prolly get up earlier in the morning...

Heidi - posted on 03/05/2009

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If he's sleeping through the night i wouldn't worry about it to much. My 5 month old has about the same scheduale. When he's older he adjust to a more parent app bed time.

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